How to Ask a Friend to Hang Out

PDF download Download Article
PDF download Download Article

If you’ve recently made a new friend, you might be considering asking them to hang out one on one. While it can feel like a big step to take, it doesn’t have to be super nerve-wracking! Read through these tips to learn how you can ask someone to hang out with you in a cool, casual way.

1

Gauge their interest with an open-ended invitation.

PDF download Download Article
  1. An open-ended invitation is a little less specific than a fully fleshed out plan. You can use this on newer friends to get a read on how interested they are in hanging out with you. Try saying something like: [1]
    • “Do you want to go for a bike ride sometime soon?”
    • “We should go check out that new coffee shop.”
    • “What days are you usually free? Wanna hang out sometime?”
    2. Advertisement
2

Keep your phrasing casual.

PDF download Download Article
  1. Instead of saying, “I’d like to invite you out on Saturday,” stick to something like, “Wanna come see the game with me this weekend?” You’ll sound more inviting, and your friend will be more likely to accept your offer. [2]
    • Start your conversation with a friendly greeting like, "Hey Billy, how are you doing? I hope you're doing well," to lead into the conversation.
    • Stay away from anything self-deprecating, too. Something like, “I have such a hard time making friends… Wanna hang out?” can be a little off-putting, and it could put unnecessary pressure on your friend.
3

Ask what they’re up to on a certain day.

PDF download Download Article
  1. This works well for things like concerts or activities that you need to buy tickets for. Be sure to follow up with the specific activity you had in mind so your friend knows why you’re asking. For example: [3]
    • “Do you have any plans next weekend? I was thinking of getting tickets to the new exhibit at the museum downtown.”
    • “What are you doing Thursday after work? I’m going to see my favorite band, and tickets are pretty cheap. Wanna come with me?”
    Kyler Shumway, Friendship Expert and Bestselling Author

    When asking a friend to spend time together, frame the invitation around a specific shared interest or activity you think they'd enjoy. This shows you value their company and interests. Give them flexible options on the timing and be graciously understanding if they can't make it.

    2. Advertisement
4

Invite them to a short, low-key outing.

PDF download Download Article
  1. Instead of inviting someone out for a multi-day camping trip, start with drinks after work or a session at the gym. Your friend will be more likely to accept if they know it isn’t something huge, especially if you two have never hung out before. [4]
    • If you’ve hung out a few times already, feel free to invite your friend on a larger hangout, like a boating trip or an afternoon of rock climbing.
5

Lock down a time, date, and place.

PDF download Download Article
  1. While it’s fine to say you’re going to hangout “soon,” that doesn’t really mean much. If you actually want to hang out with your friend, get an idea of when and where you’re going to meet up so you know it’s actually happening. [5]
    • You can confirm your plans by saying something like, “Okay cool, so drinks after work on Friday? What time do you get off?”
    • Or, “I’ll see you on Saturday to watch the game. What time should I head over?”
    • If you don’t already have your friend’s number, now would be a good time to jot it down. That way, you can text or call them if you need confirmation or directions.
    2. Advertisement
6

Include them in group plans you already have.

PDF download Download Article
  1. If you’re already heading out with a group of people, ask them to tag along if they want to. That way, if they can’t go, they don’t have to feel super bad about it. [6]
    • Say something like, “Hey, me and some buddies were gonna watch the game at my place on Sunday. Feel free to stop by if you want to!”
    • Or, “I’m meeting some friends at the river this weekend, I’d love it if you joined us.”
7

Let them contact you if they seem unsure.

PDF download Download Article
  1. Let them know when you’re free and make sure they have your number. Tell them to call or text you if they want to hang out at any point, or ask them to meet you somewhere specific. Try something like: [7]
    • “I’m free all day Saturday, so just give me a call if you want to hang out.”
    • “Feel free to text me once you get off work on Monday. I have the day off, so I won’t be doing much.”
    • “I’ll be at the mall later if you want to meet up. Text me if you decide to come!”
    2. Advertisement
8

Don’t push it if they say no.

PDF download Download Article
  1. It doesn’t mean they don’t like you—they might just be super busy or not interested in the activity you had planned. If they say they’re not up for it and they don’t propose a different idea, it’s best to just drop it and wait for your friend to suggest something else. [8]
    • Sometimes, people will say no indirectly. They might say, “I’m just super busy right now,” or, “I don’t have a lot of free time.”
    • However, if your friend says, “I’m busy tomorrow, but what about next week?” that means they actually want to hang out soon. Try to work around their schedule to make time for them.

Expert Q&A

Search
Add New Question
  • Question
    How do you ask to hang out without seeming desperate?
    Ebony Eubanks, MSW, ACSW, CAMS-II
    Therapist
    Ebony Eubanks is a Therapist, and Founder and CEO of Peaceful Living Counseling and Professional Services of Philadelphia, PA and in Hockessin, DE. With over a decade of experience providing counseling and coaching to individuals, couples, and groups, she specializes in depression, anxiety, couples work, life guidance coaching, and anger management. Ebony holds a Master’s in Social Work from Temple University and is a member of the Academy of Certified Social Workers. She is a Certified Anger Management Specialist-II, Level II trained Gottman Couples Therapist. and Certified Gestalt Therapist. Ebony also holds additional certifications in Advanced Clinician Training.
    Ebony Eubanks, MSW, ACSW, CAMS-II
    Therapist
    Expert Answer
    Focus on reconnecting with them. You might say something like: "Hey Billy, I was just thinking about you! I hope you're well—we haven't connected in a while, and I really miss talking to you. I wanted to know if you'd like to hang out at this date, or what your availability was."
    Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
    Thank you for your feedback.
    If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow
    Yes No
    Not Helpful 46 Helpful 14
  • Question
    ive just started secondary school and am having trouble asking anyone to hang out. I'm a month in and have started to be friends with someone, but it's a bit awkward to ask them to hang out.
    Miles Anderson
    Community Answer
    focus on finding friends in the classes that you have for the full year. You’ll get to know these people better, and an opening might come up to invite people to hang out. Also, ask your friend where they are going for their free period. You can ask them if you can come. If they say yes, you have an opportunity to ask them to hang or at least get to know them better.
    Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
    Thank you for your feedback.
    If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow
    Yes No
    Not Helpful 2 Helpful 8
Ask a Question
200 characters left
Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered.
Submit
      Advertisement

      Video

      Tips

      • If you feel nervous about asking a friend to hang out, try texting them or asking them in private.
        Thanks
        Helpful 4 Not Helpful 2
      Submit a Tip
      All tip submissions are carefully reviewed before being published
      Name
      Please provide your name and last initial
      Submit
      Thanks for submitting a tip for review!
      Advertisement

      You Might Also Like

      How to
      Ask Someone to Hang Out
      How to
      Make Friends
      How to
      Invite People to a Party
      How to
      Ask a Girl to Hang Out
      What to Do if You Don't Have Close Friends
      How to
      Ask a Girl Out
      How to
      Ask a Girl Out Over Text
      How to
      Ask a Girl to Be Your Girlfriend
      How to
      Give a Guy an Answer when He Asks You Out
      How to
      Ask Someone Out in Person or over Text
      How to
      Invite a Girl over to Your House (Move a Date to Your Place)
      How to
      Ask Someone Out Using a Text Message
      How to
      Ask Someone if They Like You as a Friend or in a Romantic Way
      How to
      Tell a Girl You Like Her over Text
      Advertisement

      References

      1. ↑ https://www.scienceofpeople.com/how-to-ask-someone-out/
      2. ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships-communication/dealing-with-loneliness-and-shyness.htm
      3. ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships-communication/making-good-friends.htm
      4. ↑ https://psychcentral.com/relationships/finding-new-friends-after-40
      5. ↑ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3508761/
      6. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/lifetime-connections/201503/the-13-essential-traits-good-friends
      7. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/romantically-attached/202109/55-reasons-why-people-end-friendships
      8. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/romantically-attached/202109/55-reasons-why-people-end-friendships

      About This Article

      In other languages
      Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 90,018 times.

      Did this article help you?

      Advertisement