How to Be Single and Happy in Your 30s

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When you’re not in a relationship, it can feel like everyone you know has partnered up, especially as you hit your 30s. Being single isn’t a bad thing, though—in fact, it comes with a lot of perks! You get to experience freedom at a time in your life when you know what you want. On top of that, you can focus on yourself and pursue the things you’ve always wanted to do but never had the time for! It’s totally possible to appreciate the single life for what it is.

Here are 10 tips to help you embrace being single in your 30s.

1

Enjoy your freedom.

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  1. If you want to take the day off and head to the beach, you can! People who aren’t single have another person’s schedule to worry about, but you can do whatever you want whenever you want. Enjoy it! [1]
    • It’s always good to tell at least one person where you’re going, especially if you’re alone. Shoot your mom or a close friend a text before you head out into the woods for the weekend, just to be safe.
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2

Appreciate your living space.

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  1. If you hate dishes stacked in the sink, take it upon yourself to clean them early. Or, if you don’t mind a bit of clutter, leave the house a bit messier. It’s up to you to decide how you decorate and exist in your space. [2]
    • Plus, when you’re single, you can probably get a smaller place (and a smaller place means less cleaning for you!).
3

Date yourself.

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  1. If there’s a new restaurant you’ve been dying to try out, go for it! If you want to see a new movie, head to the theater and do it! You can do anything you want on your own time. [3]
    • Another benefit to being single is that you don’t have to compromise with anyone. If you don’t want tacos, then you don’t have to get them. If you prefer action movies, you never have to watch a chick flick.
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4

Dive into your career.

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  1. You don’t have to be a workaholic, but you can take advantage of the fact that no one’s going to be mad if you get home late. Attend seminars, take extra classes, and work your way up in your field to get fulfillment out of your job. [4]
    • If you don’t like the career you’re in now, change it! It’s never too late to go back to school or take some vocational classes to switch your field.
Quiz

wikiHow Quiz: Why Am I Single?

Have you been single for a while, maybe even longer than expected? When you go through a long period of singledom, the reasons why aren’t always super obvious—but that doesn’t mean you should lose hope! Take our quiz to answer the question: Why am I single?
1 of 12

How do you feel about making new romantic connections?

5

Take time to travel.

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  1. [5] If you’ve always wanted to go abroad but you’ve never been, book a flight! You can invite a few friends with you or simply go on your own. When you travel alone, you can do anything whenever you want on your own schedule. [6]
    • If heading overseas sounds a little daunting, try taking a road trip instead.
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6

Explore a new hobby.

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  1. Maybe you could dip your toe into doing roller derby or softball. Or, you could buy a drone and practice flying it around the park. Use your free time to learn a new skill or try something fun that you haven’t had a chance to. [7]
    • Try joining a club or a hobby group to meet other people who share your similar interests.
7

Give back to your community.

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  1. Use your free time to give back to the members in your community who may be less fortunate. Volunteering can help you feel fulfilled and even make you happier in your daily life. [8]
    • If you have the space, you could even foster a pet until they find their forever home.
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8

Strengthen your friendships.

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  1. Focus on bonding with the friends you already have and making new friends to feel fulfilled. Go out to dinner, have a fun weekend with friends, and work on fostering strong relationships with people that you love. [9]
    • Focusing on your friendships can help distract you from the desire to have a partner. If you hang out with cool people that you love, you’re less likely to feel lonely.
    • If you don’t have kids yet but your friends do, see if you can babysit for them. It will be a good way to spend some time with children if you don’t have any of your own.
9

Get some quality sleep.

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  1. Invest in a nice, comfy bed with as many or as few pillows as you want. You can lie sideways, diagonal, or even straight down the middle! Take advantage of sleeping on your own by appreciating it while you have it. [10]
    • Another perk of being single: you can go to bed whenever you want! No more fighting about going to sleep too early or sleeping in too late.
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10

Stay physically active.

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  1. [11] Research shows that single people tend to be in better shape than their married counterparts. Use your free time to hit the gym, go for a jog, or swim some laps. Your body will thank you! [12]
    • Try joining a hiking group to get some exercise out in nature.

Join the Discussion...

Why am I still single?
WikiWombatCaster809
WikiWombatCaster809
I'm in my late 20s and have never been in a serious relationship. I'm just tired and frustrated. I don't know where to meet people and I'm not good at talking to new people. Should I just give up even trying?
Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW
Psychotherapist
Being single doesn't mean you're doing anything wrong! Being single gives you a chance to really love yourself so that, when you're ultimately in a relationship, you're not dependent on the other person to make you happy. It's of prime importance that you really be happy with yourself. That might look like embracing the things that you've wanted to do, going back to some hobbies, or writing a gratitude list every day about what you love about yourself. All the things that go into loving yourself and being happy with yourself are really key.

However, there are two sides to every coin. A lot of people who are single don't want to be single. And that's fine. It's just where you are now, so how can you embrace it? Think about how there are things that you can do as a single person that you can't do as part of a couple, and embrace those types of things. For example, if you'd like to travel alone, do it! Look at all the positives, and enjoy the single life while you can. You'll get into a relationship when the right person comes along!
John Keegan
Dating Coach
The number one reason is that there are more distractions than ever. There are apps like TikTok, Instagram, Twitter...there's a lot of nonstop distractions pulling people's energy in a million directions. Also, these apps make you feel like you're doing something for your social and dating life. They make you feel like you're being social when swiping or messaging, but you may never meet up with that person. It just doesn't come together.

Also, there are unrealistic and over-sexualized videos that give us the wrong idea of how life should be when we should really just focus on enjoying the simple things, like meeting someone who understands you, having a good conversation, taking a walk and having a coffee together, planning your future, and just doing things that aren't as involved now as they used to be.

I think society has shifted in many ways where a lot of people don't have to live a traditional life. For example, you don't need to live in only one location. But if you can travel the world and make money, relationships can be harder to manage with that nomadic lifestyle. One of the biggest issues, though, is the amount of distraction and the feeling that there are just so many options out there. A very beautiful girl could be getting many offers to go travel the world just because of the pictures she has up online. So then once she meets a real guy in a real situation, it's a lot less likely to come together because she has so many options pulling her attention away from having that kind of a relationship. And also, that kind of relationship may not even appeal to her anymore because now she has a lot of different options to have many different kinds of experiences.
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      References

      1. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/living-single/201901/the-single-life-may-get-even-better-age
      2. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/not-born-yesterday/201308/whats-so-good-about-being-single
      3. ↑ https://health.clevelandclinic.org/how-to-be-ok-with-being-single/
      4. ↑ https://www.cosmopolitan.com/uk/love-sex/relationships/news/a43578/why-its-okay-single-in-your-30s/
      5. ↑ Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW. Psychotherapist. Expert Interview. 27 October 2021.
      6. ↑ https://www.nytimes.com/2020/08/07/style/modern-love-when-marriage-is-just-another-overhyped-nightclub.html
      7. ↑ Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW. Psychotherapist. Expert Interview. 27 October 2021.
      8. ↑ https://health.clevelandclinic.org/how-to-be-ok-with-being-single/
      9. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/not-born-yesterday/201308/whats-so-good-about-being-single
      1. ↑ https://www.cosmopolitan.com/uk/love-sex/relationships/news/a43578/why-its-okay-single-in-your-30s/
      2. ↑ Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW. Psychotherapist. Expert Interview. 27 October 2021.
      3. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/not-born-yesterday/201308/whats-so-good-about-being-single

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