If you’re suspicious of your partner cheating, it’s easy enough to find out what’s really happening if they use an iPhone. You can check their device for any new dating apps, flirty messages, or suspicious browsing history, or use features like Find my iPhone to monitor their location without installing possibly illegal spy apps. We'll explain these (and more) ways to catch a cheating partner on an iPhone. Plus, we spoke with professional therapists and counselors about how to recognize cheating behaviors and talk to your partner about them.
Things You Should Know
- Check your partner’s iPhone for dating apps or any suspicious dating sites in their browsing history to see if they’ve cheated.
- Scroll through their texts, calls, direct messages, and pictures for anything flirty from someone you don’t recognize.
- Use the Find My iPhone feature to track your partner’s location and frequently visited places. Avoid using true spy apps without your partner’s consent.
Steps
Confronting a Cheater
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Address your partner calmly about your concerns. If you want to get to the bottom of your partner’s behavior, Allen Wagner, MFT, MA agrees that confronting them directly and asking for full transparency is the best option. When you have a quiet moment, sit down with your partner and tell them how you’re feeling.
- Example: “Hey, I noticed that you’ve been a lot more private with your phone lately and it’s making me feel a little unsure of the relationship. Is there something we need to talk about?”
- Example: “I noticed that you’ve been texting another guy a lot lately, and I feel a little uneasy about it. Can you tell me more about who they are?”
- According to Tara Vossenkemper, PhD, LPC, if a partner isn’t guilty of cheating, they will usually act concerned or worried about the accusation. If they start acting defensive, then it may be a sign they’re guilty.
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Listen to your partner’s side of the story. Supatra Tovar, PsyD, RD says to truly listen to your partner explain themselves even if they’re saying things you don’t want to hear. Stay calm and let them speak without interruption so you have a productive conversation.
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Consider couples counseling if you want to stay together. Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW says that couples therapy is a great choice “so that you have a really safe space to explore all that is going on.” Supatra Tovar, PsyD, RD agrees that therapy can help someone understand why they cheated and “can go a long way towards making lasting change for the better.”
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Choose to end the relationship if your trust has been broken. Supatra Tovar, PsyD, RD states that “if you feel strongly that the trust is broken forever, sometimes the best thing you can do is walk away.” While the decision may be tough, getting space from your partner may be the best course of action.
- Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW says that the time apart can be an opportunity for you to grow and feel whole again. She recommends doing things that help boost your own self-esteem and make you feel better about yourself.
- Reader Poll: We asked 976 wikiHow readers, and 61% said that if they found out that their partner was cheating, they’d choose to end the relationship immediately. [Take Poll]
- So, if you don’t think you’re able to work through the infidelity, then you’re not alone. Most people who’ve been in the same situation feel the same way you do now!
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Practice self-care to help you heal . Whether you decide to stay together or break up, prioritize taking care of yourself and your own well-being. Talk with your friends and family members for support, do relaxing activities like listening to your favorite songs and taking long baths, and pour yourself into your hobbies. [11] X Research source
- Avoid blaming yourself if your partner cheats on you. Your partner made their own choices and they’re the only one at fault for betraying you.
Expert Q&A
Video
Tips
- Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW says that it takes time and patience to recover from cheating, so don’t try to rush into trusting your partner again. Instead, she says to really pay attention to the actions your partner takes to rebuild your trust.Thanks
- Moshe Ratson, MFT, PCC says that it’s normal to feel betrayed, anxious, or ashamed after a person has cheated on you. Just take as much time as you need to heal and remember that you’re worthy of a strong and loving relationship.Thanks
Expert Interview
Thanks for reading our article! If you’d like to learn more about relationships, check out our in-depth interview with Supatra Tovar, PsyD, RD .
References
- ↑ https://support.apple.com/en-al/102432
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/friendship-20/201405/6-signs-your-partner-is-facebook-cheating
- ↑ https://support.apple.com/en-kw/guide/iphone/iph16ecebf48/ios
- ↑ https://pvteyes.com/private-investigator-tips-on-how-to-catch-your-cheating-spouse/
- ↑ https://support.apple.com/en-ke/HT205891
- ↑ https://support.apple.com/en-mn/guide/iphone/iph32b15b22f/ios
- ↑ https://www.apple.com/icloud/find-my/
- ↑ https://www.griffithslawpc.com/blog-articles/cheating-spouses-beware-of-sharing-apple-devices/
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/love-and-sex-in-the-digital-age/201812/10-signs-your-spouse-is-cheating