How to Convince Your Parents to Buy You a Car

Co-authored by Moshe Ratson, MFT, PCC

Last Updated: December 5, 2024 References

Cars are expensive and dangerous, but they can be the difference between Friday nights stuck alone at home and an active social life. Thus, they are one of the most important, but also most difficult asks of your teens. To get your car, you will need to spend a lot of time proving that you are mature enough for it. You will also need to make a pitch that is responsible and appreciative.

Part 1

Part 1 of 2:

Proving That You Are Mature

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1
Sign up for a driver’s education course. Before you ask for a car, research driver’s education courses. When you find one that is convenient for you, ask your parents if you can get the money to sign up. If they say no, ask if they will start giving you lessons. ^{[1]
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- If your parents aren’t eager to give you lessons, emphasize that it will be a good bonding experience. Tell them that it’ll be a good opportunity to spend more time together. Say that you’ll always remember how they taught you how to drive.
Do some online research for cars you might like and identify what you like about them. You might be drawn to flashy, fast cars, but you are more likely to demonstrate that you are mature if you emphasize responsible features. These include features like affordability, safety, and fuel-efficiency. ^{[2]
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If you’re breaking your leg doing stunts on your bike, your parents probably aren’t eager to see what you’ll do with a car. If they catch you with alcohol, they be afraid that you will drink and drive when get a car. Don’t get in trouble at school. ^{[3]
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Do your chores to win your parents' favor. Do more than they ask you to do, from time to time. When your siblings fight, try to make peace. ^{[4]
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Having a job will prove that you are responsible. You’ll be able to earn money to offer to help pay for the car. Having a job is also a good excuse for why you need a car.
Parents like the world to think that they are good at what they do. Whenever other adults are around, socialize politely and be on your best behavior. They’ll appreciate it. ^{[5]
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Part 2

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Making Your Pitch

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1
Be appreciative. When your parents give you things, show that you appreciate it. Then, when you are ready to ask for a car, reemphasize that you really appreciate all the things they do for you. Don’t act as if you are entitled to a car; this can make them angry.
- When your parents give you things, say thank you and act excited. Considering getting them a thank you card or making a nice homemade present whenever they get you something. Clean the whole house after they get you something big. This will encourage them to buy you more things, including a car, in the future.
- If you seem entitled and say things like “my friend John has a car,” parents will get upset that you expect to have a car.
Ask when your parents aren’t rushed, busy, or upset. The best time to ask is when your parents are happy with you, after, for example, a good report card or after you get a job. ^{[6]
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Start your pitch by saying “I want you to consider this for a day before you answer me.” This will make them feel less pressured and will give you more time to make your case. ^{[7]
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Emphasize your accomplishments and responsibilities. Talk about what you have accomplished around the house, in school, and in extracurricular activities. Talk about responsibilities that you would be better able to handle if you had a car. ^{[8]
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- Talk, for example, about your job, and how you could work more hours if you could drive yourself to work: “If I had a car I could drive to work on Thursdays, when you are busy.”
- Talk about clubs that you are involved in or clubs that you would be involved in if you could drive yourself around.
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Offer something in return. Promise to raise your grades, or anything that will attract your parents attention. Offer to do more chores around the house. Make a big promise that you can fulfill. Your parents might not believe that you can meet a big promise, but, if you do, they’ll feel obligated to follow through. ^{[9]
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- ”I promise to make all As this semester, if you promise to get me a car.”
- I promise to clean the whole house once a week for six months, if you promise to buy me a car.”
Tell your parents that you are willing to use your money from work to help pay for the car. Be realistic though about how much money you will have left over. After you get the car, you’ll have new expenses, like gas. ^{[10]
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Tell them that it will help build your credit. If you and your parents co-sign on the car loan, you will be able to take out a loan in your name. Paying the loan regularly will increase your credit score, so that in the future you will be able to take out loans at better rates. Emphasize that this can be a huge advantage to your future economically.
- Say something like “This will be a good opportunity to prove that I am financially responsible and to increase my credit score. ^{[11]
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- Emphasize that if you don’t start building your credit history it will be harder to buy a house in the future.
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Draw up a driving agreement. A driving agreement is a promise to follow certain safe behaviors on the road. Before asking them about the car, draw up the agreement. Offer to sign it if they buy you a car. You can include in the agreement promises like:
- ”I will not drive under the influence of drugs and alcohol.”
- ”I will not use the phone while driving.”
- ”I will not eat while driving.”
- ”I will never drive faster the speed limit.”
- ”I will not drive in rain or snow.
- ”I will not drive after 9 pm.” ^{[12]
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Bring your parents into the decision-making process. Present your parents with some of your research about cars. Show them that you have put real thought into buying a car and want to help give them the necessary information. But make it clear that it is their choice and you are just trying to help them. ^{[13]
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- Consider presenting information about cars in a PowerPoint or letter to keep all your information organized and make you look responsible.
- Consider, for example, presenting a list of reasonably prized cars. Research how much the insurance and gas is likely to cost and include this in the presentation.
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Ask why they say “no.” If your parents don’t agree to get you a car, ask why. Don’t seem upset, instead emphasize that you want to learn how to do better. Try to figure out if the issue is money or trust. If they say that they aren’t mature enough, ask them for some advice about how you could improve. ^{[14]
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- Don’t be aggressive or whinny. Say something like “Could you explain what I could do to make you feel better about buying me a car?”
Once you figure out why your parents said “no,” spend some time changing their minds. Stop any behaviors that they said proved that you were immature. Do more around the house to win their favor. If the reason they gave was money, spend some time researching cheaper cars. Try to save up some more money from work.
Give yourself some time to prove your parents wrong. When your parents seem happy again, ask them if you are acting more mature now. Tell them how much more money you have raised or about the cheaper car you have found. If they sound approving, ask them again if they are ready to buy you a car.