What Should Men Wear to a Funeral?

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Respectful funeral outfits for any weather or type of service
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Deciding what to wear is the last thing you want weighing on your mind when you’re mourning the loss of a family member or friend. When it comes to men’s attire for funerals, a subdued, dark suit with a white dress shirt, tie, and dress shoes is the standard go-to, but the most important thing to consider are the wishes of the deceased or their family. In this article, we’ll cover exactly what to wear to look respectful, (including if you don’t own a suit or if the weather is extra hot or cold), plus share a quick list of things not to wear so you never have to second-guess yourself during this hard time.

Appropriate Funeral Attire for Men

  • Wear a well-fitting black or dark-colored suit (navy, dark gray, dark brown, charcoal, etc.) with a white dress shirt.
  • Pair your suit with a solid black or dark-colored tie and black or brown dress shoes, depending on the color of your suit.
  • Choose simple, minimal accessories like a matching belt, watch, and cufflinks if you like (when in doubt, less is more).
Section 1 of 5:

Standard Funeral Attire for Men

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  1. It’s hard to go wrong with a muted, somber suit at a funeral, and it’s generally expected of you if you’re an immediate family member, close friend, or colleague of the deceased. A black suit is traditional, but other dark shades like dark gray, charcoal, dark brown, or navy are also appropriate (the key is to keep it dark and conservative). [1]
    • Both single-breasted and double-breasted jackets are appropriate, with single-breasted jackets being more popular among younger men.
    • If possible, choose a jacket that fits well (not too tight or creased around the abdomen and not too baggy or loose in the shoulders) to look put together and avoid drawing attention from mourners.
    • Press your pants to get rid of wrinkles and make sure they’re properly fitted (i.e., not skin-tight or so baggy that you need a tight belt to hold them up).
    • Go for a traditional suit over a tuxedo. Tuxes are considered celebratory and could send the wrong message at a somber event like a funeral. [2]
  2. Choose a crisp, clean, white dress shirt to go with your suit (this is the most formal and traditional shirt color for funerals). Other light colors, like blue or gray, may also be appropriate. Try to avoid loud, patterned shirts if you can (however, a subtle and muted design like stripes may be appropriate, too). [3]
    • A single cuff shirt is more appropriate than a double cuff, which looks extra fancy or celebratory.
    • Make sure to press your shirt ahead of time so it’s not wrinkled and distracting.
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  3. Choose a subdued, dark tie that complements your suit —a black tie pairs well with a black suit, while dark gray or blue can go with other colored suits. Avoid bright colors or eye-catching designs since they may seem offensive to some funeral goers. If you do want a pattern, something traditional like stripes or small dots is appropriate. [4]
  4. No matter the season or suit, dress shoes are the most appropriate footwear for men at a funeral. Wear black shoes with black suits, or your choice of black or brown shoes with other colors (whichever looks best for your suit). [5] Great options include Oxfords, loafers, or even dress boots if they’re sleek and have thin laces. [6]
  5. Generally, you want to keep your accessories minimal and conservative for a funeral. Go for a black or dark belt that matches your suit. [7] For accessories like watches, cufflinks, and other jewelry, choose something simple, clean, and not distracting (remember that funerals aren’t really the place to show off your personal style; when in doubt, go simple or opt to go without if you’re unsure whether a piece is too much).
  6. Besides your clothes and accessories, it’s important to look clean and polished in order to convey your respects to the deceased and their family. Shower beforehand and trim your facial hair (or go clean shaven), comb your hair, and put on a spritz of cologne (just make sure not to overdo it—an overpowering scent can be distracting).
    • Again, the idea is to look conservative, simple, and subdued. You might decide to get a haircut beforehand if your hair is getting wild, but don’t plan on debuting a bold new mustache or drastically different hair color at a funeral, for example.
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Section 2 of 5:

What to Wear If You Don’t Have a Suit

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  1. If you don’t own a suit and you’re not an immediate family member or pallbearer, it’s OK to dress slightly more casually. Go for dark-colored slacks (black, navy, dark gray, etc.) with a button-down dress shirt in a soft color like white, blue, or even a pastel shade. A dark, solid tie is preferred if you have one since an open collar might look too casual (but again, if you’re not immediate family or a very close friend, you’ll be alright if you skip it). [8]
    • If you have a sport coat or blazer that goes with your pants and shirt, feel free to wear it as well. You can also match suit separates in colors that go well together, like black pants and a dark gray jacket.
  2. Of course, if you want to look your best and most respectful, a suit is still the way to go. Look for an inexpensive, off-the-rack suit that fits well or consider renting one from a formalwear shop if you don’t need or want to add a suit to your wardrobe.
    • Consider checking thrift shops or second hand stores, too. You’re not guaranteed to find your size or a color and style that you like, but there’s a chance you can find a cheap suit that looks appropriate.
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Section 3 of 5:

Funeral Attire for Summer or Winter

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  1. A suit is still expected in hot weather, but for your comfort, go for a light material like linen or cotton that’s breathable. It’s also acceptable to remove your suit jacket for hot outdoor ceremonies—just make sure your pants and dress shirt fit well and aren’t wrinkled, your belt matches your pants, and that your shirt is tucked in neatly. [9]
    • Sunglasses are OK if you’re outdoors in summer, but normally they’re considered too casual for funerals.
    • Bring your suit jacket with you, even if you plan to remove it for the heat. Unless the ceremony is outdoors, you likely won’t be outside that much (and the church or funeral home may be cold inside).
  2. If it’s cold or the ceremony is outside in winter, wear a fine knit black or dark gray sweater over your dress shirt and tie. Avoid chunky cable knits, bright colors and patterns, or sweaters that are extra loose or baggy. Crewnecks half-zips, V-necks, and turtlenecks are all appropriate options. [10]
    • Or, opt for a dark overcoat to wear over your suit jacket if you’ll be outside or just need another layer. You can leave it unbuttoned if it’s not too cold, or button it up if it’s frigid.
    • Scarves, gloves, and other warm accessories are also appropriate if you’re outdoors. [11]
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Section 4 of 5:

Other Considerations for Men’s Funeral Attire

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  1. A somber suit is the funeral go-to, but it’s also important to respect the wishes of the deceased or their family members—the point of the funeral is to pay respects to them, after all. Double check the funeral information to see if there’s a requested dress code and plan your outfit accordingly.
    • For example, some families may prefer to host a “celebration of life” and ask attendees to wear bright colors or the favorite color of the deceased. Follow their wishes but try to keep it a bit toned down unless they really ask you to go overboard and wear something like a Hawaiian shirt, for example. [12]
    • Some invitations may only specify “no black.” In that case, stick to another dark or subdued color like navy or gray. Keep the look formal (a suit is still your go-to).
  2. While a black suit and tie is standard in Western, Christian cultures, other faiths and cultures may have additional or different requests for attire. For example, men are typically expected to wear a yarmulke while attending Jewish funerals , while mourners at many Hindu funerals wear white instead of black. [13] If you’re attending a religious funeral, do your best to follow traditional customs. If you’re unsure what to wear, reach out to the funeral director for more information. [14]
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Section 5 of 5:

What Not to Wear to a Funeral

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  1. While you’re putting together your funeral outfit, check this list of items not to wear to make sure you look conservative, put together, and somber:
    • Jeans
    • T-shirts, short-sleeved shirts, sweatshirts, athletic wear, or pajama clothing
    • Caps, beanies, or hats in general (unless requested by the family or required by a religious ceremony)
    • Sneakers, flip-flops, or casual shoes [15]
    • Anything that goes against the wishes of the family or deceased
    • Bright colors, vibrant patterns, big logos and brand names, or anything currently trendy
    • Glaringly ill-fitted, wrinkled, or worn out clothing [16]
    • Sunglasses (unless you’re outside for part of the service)
    • Anything tight, revealing, or suggestive
    • Extra scruffy or ungroomed facial hair or head hair

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      References

      1. ↑ https://www.thegardens.com/men-funeral-attire/
      2. ↑ https://blacklapel.com/thecompass/what-to-wear-funeral-attire-etiquette/
      3. ↑ https://www.thegardens.com/men-funeral-attire/
      4. ↑ https://www.thegardens.com/men-funeral-attire/
      5. ↑ https://www.thegardens.com/men-funeral-attire/
      6. ↑ https://www.fashionbeans.com/article/what-to-wear-to-a-funeral/
      7. ↑ https://www.thegardens.com/men-funeral-attire/
      8. ↑ https://www.thegardens.com/men-funeral-attire/
      9. ↑ https://www.funeralpartners.co.uk/help-advice/attending-a-funeral/what-to-wear-to-a-funeral/
      1. ↑ https://www.fashionbeans.com/article/what-to-wear-to-a-funeral/?http://ignorenitro=2b4a5a94da74b41c3c98a75a46f8d57a
      2. ↑ https://www.funeralpartners.co.uk/help-advice/attending-a-funeral/what-to-wear-to-a-funeral/
      3. ↑ https://funerals.uk.net/news/what-to-wear-to-a-no-black-attire-allowed-funeral/
      4. ↑ https://www.asianindianfuneralhome.com/blog/blog/dos-and-donts-attending-a-hindu-funeral-for-the-first-time
      5. ↑ https://www.signaturememorialfc.com/funeral-etiquette
      6. ↑ https://www.funeralpartners.co.uk/help-advice/attending-a-funeral/what-to-wear-to-a-funeral/
      7. ↑ https://www.gentlemansgazette.com/things-never-wear-funeral/

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