Using Tinder When You're Gay (& LGBTQ Tinder Alternatives)

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Find out if Tinder is worth your time, plus the top gay Tinder alternatives
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Whether you're a gay man, a lesbian, or somewhere else on the queer continuum, you've likely heard about Tinder. Tinder is wildly popular with the straight crowd, but is it the best choice for us? This wikiHow article digs into how Tinder works for people on the LGBTQ spectrum, getting the most out of Tinder when you're gay, and the best gay Tinder alternatives to explore.

Things You Should Know

  • Tinder's large user base makes it a valuable dating app for the LGBTQ community, even though it's not exclusively a gay app.
  • If you want to use a gay-specific version of Tinder, try apps like Grindr, Growlr, Adam4Adam, Scruff, and Her.
  • On Tinder, you can select and filter matches by gender identity, sexual orientation, and relationship preference.
Section 1 of 3:

Is Tinder a good dating app if you're gay?

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    As the most popular dating app worldwide, it seems like everybody is on Tinder , regardless of preference. [1] No matter who you're interested in, you will likely find someone who checks at least some of your boxes on Tinder.
    • Pros
      • If you're gay, bisexual, or otherwise queer-identified, you can easily filter your matches to show other people who match your gender and orientation preferences.
      • You can list the type of relationship you're looking for (e.g., polyamorous, monogamous, open relationship) and filter matches to only display users who seek that same relationship style(s). [2]
      • You can specify your gender, pronouns , and preference/orientation on your profile, and many options are available for each. [3]
    • Cons
      • Filtering by gender and orientation doesn't always keep straight people out of your matches. [4]
      • While you may find people looking for long-term relationships on Tinder, the app is better known for short-term flings and hookups.
      • If you're in the closet , Tinder's large user base may be intimidating, as people of any gender or preference can discover you.
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Section 2 of 3:

How to Use Tinder if You're Gay

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    There is no "gay version of Tinder," but you can use the regular Tinder app to find gay people easily. While it's not required to specify your orientation, it's pretty important if you're gay or queer and want to find the members of your dating pool. If you leave your orientation blank and just search by gender, you'll see plenty of straight people in your matches who may not be interested. Just choose the Edit Profile option, then choose the LGBTQ orientation that most closely matches how you identify. [5]
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    If your gender identity is something other than Man or Woman, you can select the Beyond Binary option in Edit Profile to specify another gender. [6] And because Tinder users can filter by gender, you may also want to add additional genders in the "Include you in searches for" section so you'll show up in relevant searches.
    • For example, if you're trans, there are multiple trans options that might be seen as similar (e.g., Transmasculine and FTM). If you identify as Transmasculine but also want to be seen by people who specify that they're looking for looking for "Male," "FTM," and "Transgender Man" on Tinder, you can select other descriptors here.
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    Tap the profile icon in Tinder, select Settings , and then scroll down to Discovery Settings to set preferences for who you want to see on Tinder—gender, relationship style, orientation, age range, and more. [7] As long as you limit Discovery to the genders and orientations you're interested in, you should only see accurate matches.
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Section 3 of 3:

Gay Tinder Alternatives

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    Grindr is a hugely popular gay Tinder alternative, sometimes called "Gay Tinder." The app caters mostly to gay and bisexual men, but because many other dating apps aren't trans-friendly, you can also find love (and hookups) on Grindr as a trans woman or non-binary queer person who is seeking men. Grindr displays your matches in order of distance, which is helpful when looking for a quick hookup. [8] And because Grindr is the most popular dating app for gay men, you're bound to find matches when traveling, in small towns , and just about anywhere.
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    In the app's early days, Scruff was considered "Grindr for bears, otters, and cubs," but the app is now more inclusive to other queer and masculine-of-center queer people—in fact, it bills itself as being "the top-rated and most reliable app for gay, bi, trans, and queer people to connect. [9] " Scruff can definitely be thought of as a gay Tinder , as its interface is similar and has both free and paid tiers. But unlike Tinder, Scruff is LGBTQ-owned.
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    Known as "the world's largest social network for the bear community," Growlr is a free gay Tinder alternative for the ruggedly masculine man. [10] You can even use Growlr to stream live real-time video at no cost. Picking up where the old Scruff left off, Growlr is a welcoming space with plenty of dating options for "bears, cubs, and chubs."
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    While the name of this Tinder alternative might make you think "lesbian only," Her is actually for anyone who isn't a cisgender man. If you're a lesbian , bi, queer, butch, femme, non-binary , gender non-confirming, trans, or fall anywhere else on the queer continuum (and not a cisgender man), Her is for you. [11] Her has a free tier, but you'll need to pay if you want to see who's online now or use the app incognito. Unlike Tinder, Her also gives you plenty of options to express your personality beyond photos, which makes it easy to strike up conversations .
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    Jack'd is one of the best gay Tinder alternatives for Black men and other masculine-of-center people of color. [12] Now owned by the same company who runs Scruff, Jack'd can help you find love, dates, and hookups all over the world. Most features of Jack'd are free, but you can upgrade to Jack'd Pro to browse guys anonymously and get more matches. [13]
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    Gay and bisexual men have been using Adam4Adam to find dates and love before Tinder, and the platform is still going strong. Because Adam4Adam is completely free (with a paid tier to get rid of ads and browse invisibly), it makes a great gay Tinder alternative for those who don't want to pay to send messages. [14]
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    If you're queer and want to get to know someone before arranging a date, OKCupid can be a great alternative to Tinder. OKCupid allows you to answer questions about yourself, what you're looking for, and aspects of your lifestyle and personality that can help you narrow down your matches to those you'll really jive with. While OKCupid used to be the go-to dating app for queer people (especially queer women), it's now far less active than Tinder.
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    Lex started as an Instagram account for lesbians and queer women called "Personals," which focused on bringing back the Craigslist W4W vibe of text-only dating ads. Lex had a viral moment in the queer community a few years back, but the hype has died down a bit since the final version of the app focuses less on dating and more on friendships and community. Unlike most other queer Tinder alternatives, Lex doesn't require payment for its features. Still, making new queer friends can lead to the best love.
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    Taimi is a newer LGBTQ Tinder alternative that started as an app for gay men. [15] Taimi now supports multiple genders and orientations and can be a great way to meet other queers across the world. The basic version of Taimi is free, but many of its features require a subscription. [16]
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    Billing itself as "the dating app designed to be deleted," Hinge is geared toward finding love. While it's not a specifically gay dating app, the platform has a large LGBTQ user base and dedicates itself to supporting the queer community. [17] Hinge is like Tinder in that you swipe through photos and can pay for upgrades, but unlike Tinder, they offer prompts to spark conversation and the ability to like parts of people's profiles before you match. [18]
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      References

      1. ↑ https://www.statista.com/topics/10082/tinder/#topicOverview
      2. ↑ https://au.tinderpressroom.com/relationshiptypes
      3. ↑ https://www.cnn.com/2019/06/04/tech/tinder-glaad-sexual-orientation/index.html
      4. ↑ https://www.nbcnews.com/think/opinion/looking-love-tinder-lesbians-must-first-swipe-past-parade-straight-ncna1047721
      5. ↑ https://www.help.tinder.com/hc/en-us/articles/15668360470669-Gender-Sexual-Orientation-
      6. ↑ https://www.help.tinder.com/hc/en-us/articles/15668360470669-Gender-Sexual-Orientation-
      7. ↑ https://www.help.tinder.com/hc/en-us/articles/115003517346-Profiles-don-t-match-my-gender-or-age-preferences
      8. ↑ https://help.grindr.com/hc/en-us/articles/1500012478721-What-is-Grindr-
      9. ↑ https://apps.apple.com/us/app/scruff-gay-dating-chat/id380015247
      1. ↑ https://www.growlrapp.com/
      2. ↑ https://weareher.com/
      3. ↑ https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/soloish/wp/2016/06/15/what-is-jackd-the-gay-dating-app-explained/
      4. ↑ https://support.jackd.com/hc/en-us/articles/360017716574-Jack-d-Pro-features
      5. ↑ https://adam4adam.zendesk.com/hc/en-us/articles/115001798409-What-is-the-VIP-ACCESS-membership-
      6. ↑ https://www.thepinknews.com/2018/05/04/new-dating-app-taimi-aims-to-build-biggest-and-safest-gay-dating-community/
      7. ↑ https://taimi.com/support/answer/193
      8. ↑ https://hinge.co/press/2023-DATE-report
      9. ↑ https://hingeapp.zendesk.com/hc/en-us/articles/360007906593-Liking-and-Commenting-in-Discover

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