How to Get Any Guy You Want

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When you’re trying to attract a guy, it can sometimes feel like a puzzle that’s impossible to solve. However, it doesn’t have to be hard! Getting any guy you want is easy when you know how to do it. Keep reading to learn how you can broaden your horizons and master the dating world.

1

Maintain your confidence.

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  1. Guys love someone who can live their own life without them, but they also appreciate it if you aren’t a snob. As you talk to guys in your life, hold your head high and get the message across that you can handle anything. [1]
    • For example, let’s say your car breaks down. A confident person might handle it all on their own and then relay the story to a guy the next day. You’re showing that you can take care of yourself without bragging about it.
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2

Show off your intelligence.

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  1. Show the guys around you that you can hold your own in any conversation topic they throw at you. You don’t have to be a rocket scientist, but don’t be afraid to talk about things you know a lot about.
    • You might have heard that guys don’t like it when people are too smart. While this might be the case for some guys, you shouldn’t dumb yourself down for the sake of attracting someone.
    • Ask him questions about himself and talk less about yourself. Make it a real conversation about something you guys have in common. [2]
3

Make eye contact and smile.

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  1. If you spot a cute guy from across the room, glance in his direction, then give him a quick smile. For most guys, this is the signal that you want to be approached by them. [3]
    • Similarly, try to keep your phone in your pocket or your purse. If you have your head down and you’re staring at a screen, you won’t look very approachable.
    • Reader Poll: We asked 364 wikiHow readers if they thought putting away their phone enhances a date, and 89% of them said Yes. [Take Poll] If you're looking at your phone, you can't make eye contact!
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4

Ask for help.

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  1. If you’re having trouble starting a conversation with a dude, go over and ask for a small favor. It can be something as simple as, “Could you pass me a straw?” [4]
    • You could also open up about a challenging situation at work or a tough assignment you’re working on at school. Most guys love to offer advice.
    • While it’s okay to ask for help on the small stuff, save the bigger stuff for someone you’re actually in a relationship with.
5

Give him a few compliments.

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  1. If you want to make a guy think about you for a long time, simply tell him you like his shirt or that his hair looks nice. Chances are, he’s going to remember what you said (and who you are). [5]
    • It can be something as small as, “Wow, I really like that shirt. Looks good on you.”
    • Stick to 1 to 2 compliments per conversation. That way, you won’t overwhelm him or make him think you’re too into him.
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6

Talk about what you do for fun.

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  1. What do you like to do when you aren’t working or at school? Tell him tales of how you go rock climbing on the weekends or how you’re working on writing the next best-selling novel. Chances are, he’ll be interested enough to ask you more about it. [6]
    • If you do something on the weekends that’s a group activity (hiking, fishing, skiing, etc.) feel free to invite him along.
7

Act indifferent toward him.

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  1. Instead of fawning all over him, act like you just think he’s okay. If he texts you, wait a few hours before you respond. If he flirts with you, act like you don’t notice. Many guys like the “chase,” even if they won’t admit it.
    • This can be a tricky thing to balance out—you want to show a little interest so he doesn’t give up, but you don’t want to go too far and scare him off. [7] For instance, if he wants to take you out on a Saturday, you could tell him that you’re busy that night but free on Sunday.
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8

Put effort into your appearance.

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  1. Dress in clean, well-fitting clothes that flatter your body. Do your hair, and put on a little makeup if you’d like to. There’s no standard for what will attract guys, so as long as you feel good, you’re going to look great! [8] [9]
    • Guys usually don’t care too much about fashion or designer labels. Feel free to wear something expensive if you have it, but don’t worry too much about the latest trends.
9

Go out with a small group.

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  1. Oftentimes, guys find it intimidating when someone is in a large group of people. You’re more likely to be approached by a guy if you aren’t surrounded by others. [10]
    • Some guys have the confidence to approach you when you’re out with a large group, but they’re few and far between.
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10

Hang out where guys are.

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  1. If you’re trying to get a guy, you probably want to head to a bar or a club on a Saturday night. There will probably be lots of dudes to choose from, and you’re more likely to stumble across someone you like. [11]
    • Clubs and bars are usually your best bet since people are more likely to approach you for a conversation there.
    • If bars or clubs aren’t really your scene, try going to a coffee shop or a bookstore instead.
    EXPERT TIP

    John Keegan

    Dating Coach
    John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.
    John Keegan
    Dating Coach

    Try using activities you love to meet guys. Don't be afraid to put yourself out there and share new experiences with guys in a way that's meaningful to you. Investing energy into these new experiences can really pay off!




Join the Discussion...

How do you get a boyfriend?
WikiChinchillaCaster400
WikiChinchillaCaster400
I'm ready to get into the dating pool and find a good guy that's right for me...I just don't know where to get started lol. I feel like you can't just bump into people like in the movies, so where do I even go to find a potential boyfriend these days? Any tricks to make a guy notice me and keep chatting with me? I want to hear it all!
Sarah Schewitz, PsyD
Licensed Psychologist
There’s always online dating, which is probably one of the more convenient ways. It's nice that you can sit on your couch and not have to go meet somebody for that initial kind of connection, but some people find dating sites really draining. There are other ways that are great for many people, such as just living your life and doing what you love. Put yourself out there, find hobbies that bring you joy, and you may find someone that has some similar traits as you.

As a woman meeting a man, you're kind of assessing if he's safe, if he's kind, if he's the type of person you want to be with. Those are the people you want to look for. I think for a man to come off super aggressive and really forward can actually be a little off putting, as far as first impressions go.

When you're feeling like someone is a good fit, just say hi. It doesn’t have to be anything spectacular! I think, as a woman trying to start a conversation with a man, it's nice to just smile, ask how they're doing, and just open that door for conversation.
WikiPandaTamer982
WikiPandaTamer982
Tbh as a woman, a little bit of initiative can go a long way in the dating scene. Men are used to being the one doing the courting and asking out, so if you take initiative and ask out guys instead, there's a good chance that it can go in your favor and you have more control over the guys you go after because you're going to them instead of having them come to you.

I'm a woman and I asked my current boyfriend out. At first he seemed a little surprised, but in like a "whoa I didn't realize you liked me and would ask me out!" kind of way, and then a split second later he was over the moon saying yes and getting excited to go on dates with me.

I know before you can ask a guy out, you have to meet one first. Consider joining hobby or meetup groups to find people who have similar interests as you. You can also sign up for a class, volunteer, or become a regular and some local establishments. And then once you find a guy, to get his attention you can strike up a conversation with him, be friendly and complimentary and genuinely interested in what he has to say. Good luck!
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    How do you get a guy to fall for you if they have a girlfriend?
    Hannah Madden
    Community Answer
    Trying to attract someone who already has a girlfriend probably isn't a great idea. You never know what's going on in their relationship, and you don't want to be the cause of a breakup. Try setting your sights on someone who's single for a lot less drama.
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      References

      1. ↑ https://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/news/a30439/things-guys-notice-when-you-first-meet/
      2. ↑ Judith Gottesman, MSW. Matchmaker & Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 19 October 2021.
      3. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201305/how-get-guys-or-gals-attention
      4. ↑ https://www.today.com/health/what-men-find-sexy-simple-ways-get-him-notice-you-t100399
      5. ↑ https://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/6-kinds-of-compliments-men-would-love-to-hear-more-often-jgc/
      6. ↑ https://www.today.com/health/what-men-find-sexy-simple-ways-get-him-notice-you-t100399
      7. ↑ Judith Gottesman, MSW. Matchmaker & Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 19 October 2021.
      8. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/bias-fundamentals/202003/what-makes-someone-physically-attracted-you
      9. ↑ Judith Gottesman, MSW. Matchmaker & Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 19 October 2021.
      1. ↑ https://www.today.com/health/what-men-find-sexy-simple-ways-get-him-notice-you-t100399
      2. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/bias-fundamentals/202003/what-makes-someone-physically-attracted-you

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