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If you’ve been single for a while, you might be wondering how you can land a girlfriend—and fast. While there’s no miraculous way to make a girl fall in love with you, there are a few ways you can put yourself out there and set yourself up for success. Keep reading to learn where you can meet potential dates and how you can approach them to ask them out.

Things You Should Know

  • Dating apps, mutual friends, clubs, and social media are all great ways to meet new people (like future girlfriends, for instance!).
  • If you hit it off with a girl, ask her on a date. Keep building your connection and when you feel ready, ask her to be your girlfriend.
  • If it doesn't work out, don't get discouraged. Instead, get back out there and try again.
2

Talk to people on social media.

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  1. If you see someone cute on Instagram, Facebook, or Twitter, try reaching out via DM to start a conversation. As you two chat, you might be able to get her number and then eventually ask her out. [2]
    • If you already know her, try starting the conversation with something like, “Hey! Remember me? I think we had English class together in high school.”
    • If you don’t know her, try something like, “Hey, you seem really cool! I love that new pic you just posted.”
3

Try dating apps.

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  1. Try downloading Tinder, Bumble, Coffee meets Bagel, or Hinge to start conversations with girls in your area. If you see someone that you like, send them a message to get a conversation going. [3]
    • You can get a good conversation going on a dating app by talking about something they put in their profile or their bio. If you see that they’ve been skydiving before, try something like, “I’ve always wanted to go skydiving! Was it super scary?”
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4

Join a new group or club.

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  1. If you have a hobby, try searching for clubs or meetup groups for your specific activity. Or, try out something new by joining a club you’ve never heard of before. You’re sure to meet some cool people, and you’ll at least make new friends out of the experience. [4]
    • Try looking for groups like this on Facebook or NextDoor.
    EXPERT TIP

    John Keegan

    Dating Coach
    John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.
    John Keegan
    Dating Coach

    Shared experiences are a great way to forge bonds. Investing energy into building real connections will pay off!

5

Approach girls in public.

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  1. If you spot a cute girl out in public, feel free to go up to her and start chatting. If you aren't sure what to say, try commenting on something around you. Then, let the conversation flow from there. [5]
    • For instance, if you’re at a coffee shop, you might say, “I always get the same vanilla latte. What’s your drink order? I’m thinking of mixing it up.”
    • Some women might not want to be approached in public, which is fine. If the girl you’re talking to isn’t responding or looks uncomfortable, don’t push it.
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6

Use open body language.

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  1. Instead, stand with your arms down by your side and your head held high. Maintain good posture and make eye contact with people, and smile as you pass them by. [6]
    • Open body language suggests that you’re open to chatting with new people.
    • Try to avoid looking down and crossing your arms, since that signals you don’t want to talk to anyone.
    • If you like a girl, try using your body language to flirt with her. Look into her eyes a little longer than you normally would, lean in closer to her, or touch her on the arm or elbow, for instance. [7]
8

Get to know the girl on your date.

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  1. When you hang out on your date, talk about your interests, your friends, and what you want to do in the future. If you’re both having fun, then that means you two should probably keep seeing each other! If you’re not having such a great time, it probably means you two just aren’t meant to be. [9]
    • Bad dates might happen, and that’s okay. Going out on dates is the only way to figure out if you want this girl to be your girlfriend or not (and if she wants to be yours).
    • Reader Poll: We asked 375 wikiHow readers who've asked someone on a date, and 51% of them agreed that the best way to approach it is by taking things slow and getting to know them. [Take Poll]
10

Figure out if you’re a good fit.

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  1. Just because you guys go on a few dates doesn’t necessarily mean you two would make a good couple. If you have a fun time with her, are able to talk about a wide variety of topics, and think she’s a good person, then you’re probably a good match. [11]
    • On the flip side, if you two often run out of things to talk about, argue, or don’t really have a good time together, it might be time to set your sights elsewhere.
    • If you aren’t a good fit, let her know that the spark just isn’t there and you don’t think you guys are going to work out.
11

Ask her to be your girlfriend when you’re ready.

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      Tips

      • Try not to focus too much on getting a girlfriend, and instead focus on meeting cool new people. It will put less pressure on you and set you up for success.
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