How to Spoil Your Boyfriend Based on His Love Language

Looking for sweet and unique ways to pamper the man in your life? We’ve got you. Spoiling your boyfriend can include doing things both big and small, and depending on his love language, he may want to be spoiled in a specific way. We’ve spoken with licensed marriage and family therapist Allen Wagner and relationship psychologist Dr. Sarah Schewitz to learn all the best ways to spoil your boyfriend based on his love language. We'll even share the top tips for spoiling your bf if the two of you are long-distance, too!

How to Spoil Your Boyfriend

To spoil your boyfriend, cater to his love language: buy him something that he's been wanting (gifts), write him a sweet letter (words of affirmation), do a chore he dreads doing (acts of service), plan a date for the two of you (quality time), or give him a massage (physical touch)

Section 1 of 7:

How to Spoil Your Boyfriend with Gifts

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1
Take him to see his favorite artist in concert. Check when your boyfriend’s favorite artist is coming to a venue near you and get him tickets to the show! Get hyped by listening to the artist’s favorite album while you’re on the way to the show, buy him drinks before the show starts and have a good time at the concert. Dance with your boyfriend and let him sing his heart out to help him feel like the most lucky guy in the world. ^{[1]
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- Unless you’re recording the show, try to keep your phone away and enjoy the moment.
2
Get him flowers. It tends to be rare for a guy to receive flowers, as it’s usually the other way around. For gifts, guys typically get functional things that they can use over and over, which is great, but flowers can help a man feel spoiled, as they are often meant to bring joy. To help your man feel spoiled and show him that you were thinking of him, grab him some flowers ! ^{[2]
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- Ask him what his favorite color is to determine what color to get him.
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3
Get him a new pair of shoes. Whether your boyfriend is a sneakerhead or is in need of new shoes, buying him a new pair of kicks is a great way to spoil him. Check the size of the shoes he wears the most, subtly ask him if there are any shoe’s he’s been looking at, and buy them for him! Gifting him a pair of shoes will help make him feel loved and appreciated.
- Licensed marriage and family therapist Allen Wagner says that rather than being materialistic, gift giving is “more about the significance of that person and the purchase and the gift itself, [which] shows the person that they’re loved.”
If your boyfriend is a gamer, get him his favorite video game. If he hasn’t been looking at any new games, get him a gift card for his console or buy downloadable content (DLC) for his favorite game. This will help make him feel spoiled and show him how thoughtful you are. ^{[3]
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Get him a gift card to his favorite store. If your boyfriend is a frequent shopper, surprise him with a gift card to his favorite store! It’ll help him keep money in his pockets and let him splurge with your help. When he’s in the store grabbing his goodies, the card will help remind him how much you spoil him.
- Be thoughtful when getting him a gift card. Make sure it’s for a place he frequents. ^{[4]
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Sneak his favorite snack into his work bag. This one is pretty simple, but it’s a surefire way to make him feel spoiled. The next time you’re out, grab his favorite snack without him knowing. Then, sneak it into his work bag the night before. When he arrives at work, he’ll likely notice the snack and wonder where it came from. Send him a text or leave a note to let him know it was you!
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Tuck a surprise gift into his suitcase. Get him a gift and sneak in his suitcase if he’s traveling somewhere so he opens it when he arrives and is reminded of you. Get him a sentimental piece of jewelry or a book that you know he’d enjoy so he’s fresh on his trip (both physically and mentally). ^{[5]
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Buy him his favorite scent. Whether your boyfriend is a cologne fanatic or you just want to treat him, buying him his favorite scent will make him feel loved and appreciated. You’ll also save him some money, which he’ll likely really appreciate. So show him love and make him feel spoiled by gifting him his favorite cologne or scented lotion.
- Gift him his favorite candle, wallflower, or room spray if he doesn’t prefer colognes.

Section 2 of 7:

How to Spoil Your Boyfriend with Words of Affirmation

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1
Write him a sweet letter. When you want to show your boyfriend that you care about him and make him feel spoiled, write him a love letter that expresses those things. Tell him about his qualities that you enjoy, commend him if he’s been a great partner, and express how much you respect and admire him. ^{[6]
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- Write something like “I really appreciate how well you’ve been taking care of me. You’re one of a kind, my love. You never fail to make me feel like royalty. I love you with all my heart <3”
- This is also a great way to spoil your long-distance boyfriend.
2

Show gratitude and remind him why you love him. Whether it’s a quick text expressing how grateful you are for something he did around the house or a dinner conversation where you talk about the qualities that keep you in love with him, showing gratitude is a great way to make your partner feel spoiled through words of affirmation. ^{[7]
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To make your boyfriend feel loved and cared for, dedicate something to him on social media, like an Instagram post or X Status. Caption the post with something like “Just wanted to give a shoutout to my amazing boyfriend! He’s always taking care of me and making sure I feel loved. He’s truly the most incredible guy I could ask for!”
4

Give him compliments when you see him. When you notice that he got a new haircut, has a new shirt on, or that you’re feeling appreciative, compliment him! Sex and relationship psychologist Dr. Sarah Schewitz says that “somebody whose love language is words of affirmation is going to find it really romantic to hear: I love you, or you’re beautiful or I don't know what I would do without you.”
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Text him a poem you wrote him. Write a poem for your boyfriend and text it to him to make him feel loved and spoiled. It doesn’t have to be Shakespearean levels of poetry. In fact, it can be a simple four line stanza. By putting together a loving, heartfelt poem for your partner, you’ll show him how deep your love is by expressing it through his love language.
- Include funny, humorous moments so your partner has a laugh while reading. ^{[8]
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Words of affirmation can be pretty simple. If you want to make your boyfriend feel loved and spoiled, remind him how proud you are of him and what he’s accomplished. Say something like “I just wanted to let you know that I’m so proud of you. You’ve been working so hard and it’s paying off” to show him that you’re rooting for him and happy with his accomplishments. ^{[9]
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Section 3 of 7:

How to Spoil Your Boyfriend with Acts of Service

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Acts of service aren’t just about serving your partner, but they’re also about helping take things off of their plate. If your boyfriend hates doing laundry, or despises filling the water dispenser, do it for him whenever you want to spoil him. ^{[10]
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Bring him breakfast in bed. After a long week of work or on a day that your boyfriend doesn’t have any immediate obligations or responsibilities, bring him breakfast in bed to make him feel special. Wake up earlier than him, tell him to stay in bed, prepare his favorite breakfast, and bring it to the room to spoil him during the waking hours. Make sure to use plates that can catch crumbs and don’t forget to include napkins! ^{[11]
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Pack his lunch for the day. Whether your boyfriend is the type to take a lunch to work with him everyday or he’s the type to always get takeout, packing him a lunch is a great way to spoil him. It will save him time in the day, make him feel appreciated , and show him that you care through your actions.
When you notice that your boyfriend’s car is getting dirty or that his gas tank is low, surprise him by taking his car out for a wash and filling his tank up for him. It’ll knock something off of his to-do list and show him that you care. ^{[12]
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Surprise him with dinner at the end of a long day. When your partner texts you about a long day at work or gets home in a bad mood, soothe his stress by making him a big dinner at the end of his day. He’ll likely go from down in the dumps to cheerful and loving. ^{[13]
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Fill the fridge with his favorite food and drinks. This may feel small, but it’s the little things that count! By filling the fridge with your boyfriend’s favorite food and drinks, you’ll make sure he has a pick-me-up whenever he needs it, and he’ll feel spoiled with the effort you’re putting into the relationship. ^{[14]
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If your boyfriend is always working late and always has to figure out what he’s going to eat for dinner, express that you care by ordering him food from a restaurant he likes and having it delivered to his job. Shoot him a text after you’ve ordered it to let him know the delivery details. It’ll make him feel spoiled and his coworkers may even get jealous! ^{[15]
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Section 4 of 7:

How to Spoil Your Boyfriend with Physical Touch

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Whether your boyfriend is tense from a long day at work or just generally exhausted, Schewitz says that giving him a massage is a great way to make him feel loved if his love language is physical touch.
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Hug him from behind. A quick hug from behind will help your boyfriend feel loved and close to you. If you want to make him feel spoiled, come from behind, wrap your arms around his hips, and lean into him for a tight hug. Hold the hug to really let the love simmer. ^{[16]
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Hold his arm or hand. Whether you’re out in public or at home laying in bed, holding onto your boyfriend’s arm or hand is a great way to make him feel loved, appreciated, and important. Spoil him and show him your appreciation by squeezing his arm and holding his hand, whether you’re out and about or chilling inside. ^{[17]
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Brush or braid his hair. Playing with your partner’s hair or taking care of it can make them feel extremely loved. Spoil him by gently running your fingers through his hair, braiding it for fun, or brushing it when you notice it could use a brush. ^{[18]
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If you guys are in the bedroom and getting intimate, spoil him by focusing on his pleasure. Rub his body, kiss his chest and neck, and ask him what he wants to do. Take time to learn his preferences and desires. By dedicating the moment to him and making sure he feels good, you’ll help him feel loved, appreciated, and definitely spoiled. ^{[19]
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Pull him into a kiss. When your boyfriend is standing somewhere, grab his arm and pull him in for a kiss . It doesn’t have to be prompted by anything, either. A simple smooch on the lips, cheeks, or even eyebrows can help your partner feel loved and spoiled. ^{[20]
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- Do your best to kiss him frequently, especially before you leave.
7

Hold hands or cuddle while you watch a movie. A simple way to spoil your partner is by holding his hands or cuddling while you watch a movie. Casually curl up next to him and grab his hand to show him that you want to be next to him. Throw in a few kisses on his hand or cheek to make him feel really loved and appreciated. ^{[21]
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8

Rest your head on him. Gently drop your head on his shoulder, arm, or chest to show him that you love you. If you’re in public, resting your head on his shoulder or arm can help keep things subtle while still expressing that you care. ^{[22]
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If your boyfriend is comfortable and in a good mood, playfully squeeze his butt when you walk past him. Say a joke as you pass him to add a humorous element to the interaction. He’ll likely appreciate having a partner who’s so funny and affectionate.

Section 5 of 7:

How to Spoil Your Boyfriend with Quality Time

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1
Make date plans and connect with each other. If your boyfriend is always the one who plans dates or gets fun activities prepared, return the favor when you want to spoil him. Set a reservation at his favorite restaurant, handle the bill and transportation, and dedicate the day to connecting with him! He’ll likely feel loved and spoiled.
- Schewitz says that “they’re going to really appreciate you planning an amazing date for them where everything's just handled and they don't have to worry about a thing.”
- Schewitz says that “you guys just have to sit there and connect with each other and have great conversation and in an amazing atmosphere.”
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Watch the sunrise or sunset together. Watching the sunrise and sunset is always a grounding experience. If your boyfriend values quality time, take him out to a beach or hill and watch the sunrise or sunset together. Not only will he enjoy being able to share the experience with you, but he will also feel loved and appreciated since you offered to spend your time with him.
3

Cook a meal or bake something with him. A great way to spend time with your boyfriend is by tackling new recipes with him. Taking on new challenges in the kitchen can encourage you two to work together, build on each other’s strengths and weaknesses, and make for exciting quality time with your partner. On top of that, you two will be able to share a delicious meal! ^{[23]
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Going on a hike is a great opportunity for quality time with your boyfriend. You two will create a shared memory, have lots of time to talk about what’s new, and explore the challenge of scaling nature together. If your partner’s love language is quality time, take him on a hike to make him feel spoiled. ^{[24]
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Visit a museum or art gallery. Heading to a museum or art gallery with your boyfriend is a great way to spend quality time together. Have conversations about the art, critique things and explain what you think an artist was trying to say with a piece. Not only will you and your partner be able to pick each other’s brains, but you’ll help make him feel spoiled with all of the time he gets to spend with you. ^{[25]
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6

Have a phone-free day. Spending the day with your phones off forces you and your partner to spend quality time with one another, which will help make him feel appreciated if his love language is quality time. Stop doomscrolling, turn your phone off, and encourage your partner to do the same. Then, dedicate a day to doing things together so he feels loved and spoiled.
7
Go on a road trip. A road trip practically forces you and your partner to dive deep into conversation. After a while, you may not have any casual, surface level topics to talk about, which is the perfect opportunity to go deep and spend some time getting to know your partner inside and out. Plus, you get to take on the road together. So, head on a road trip to spoil your partner with some quality time.
- As you pass towns and landmarks, have conversations with your boyfriend about exciting things you notice.
To really spoil your boyfriend with some quality time, plan a romantic getaway from just the two of you. Book a hotel in a state or country you both have always wanted to go to, prepare an itinerary with time to explore the local sights and time for just you two, and have a fun romantic vacation. Do your best to keep your phones away so you have more time to connect. ^{[26]
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Section 6 of 7:

How to Spoil Your Boyfriend Without Money

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To spoil your boyfriend without money, grab some paper and art supplies from around the house and make him a heartfelt, handmade card . In the card, talk about shared memories, things you love about him, and include pictures of you two. Whether the card or for a special occasion or just because, it’s bound to make him feel loved and special. ^{[27]
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Plan a picnic with him. Pack some sandwiches and snacks, a few drinks, and a blanket, then take your boyfriend on a picnic to spoil him! Plan it for a sunny day and talk to him to see what days work best with his schedule, then head down to an open park or field and enjoy a picnic. Pack some food from home to avoid breaking the bank. ^{[28]
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Take a walk through town. Sometimes, all your boyfriend needs to feel spoiled is your company. When the weather permits, take him out for a walk across town and catch up on life. If you guys are already caught up, make conversation about your town’s architecture, passing restaurants, or cool-looking stores. ^{[29]
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- Add a flair of romance to your walk by taking a visit to the beach on a moonlit night.
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Snuggle and watch a movie of his choice on a rainy day. If the clouds are overhead and rain is pouring down, one of the best things to do to spoil your partner is simply curl up next to him and watch a movie inside. To make him feel spoiled, let him choose the movie and make his favorite snacks. ^{[30]
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If your boyfriend deleted TikTok or isn’t active on social media, making him a collection or compilation of videos that you think he’d enjoy is a great way to spoil him and make him feel appreciated. Send videos to his old TikTok account or compile videos from different websites together and show him when you’re together.

Section 7 of 7:

How to Spoil Your Long-Distance Boyfriend

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1
Send him a “just-cause” gift. You don’t need a special occasion to send your boyfriend a gift. If you want to make your boyfriend feel special, send him a “just-cause gift.” Include a T-shirt that matches his style, a pair of shoes he’s been talking about, or a gadget that he’s been talking your ear off about. ^{[31]
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- Include a personal, hand-written note to make him feel really appreciated.
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Make him a care package. Make your long-distance boyfriend a care package of goodies to really make him feel special. Over time, grab items that remind you of him or that you’d think he’d love. Make him a scrapbook of shared moments, grab some nonperishable foods (or baked goods if your partner is close enough), put everything into a package with a heartfelt note and send it over! ^{[32]
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Make him a special playlist with songs that remind you of him. When you want to spoil your long-distance boyfriend, one of the best things you can do is make him a playlist with songs that remind you of him. Add some of his favorite songs, too! When he’s having a rough day, he can listen to your playlist and remember all of the good times you two share. ^{[33]
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- Make a collaborative playlist so both of you can add songs.
4

Watch movies online together. To spoil your long distance boyfriend, watch movies together while on the phone, over a video call, or using programs like Teleparty or Netflix Party. Decide a date and time and schedule a movie night to make your boyfriend feel spoiled and strengthen your relationship . ^{[34]
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Set up a video date. Find a day where both of you are free, order some food to your house and his house, then hop on a video chat for a virtual date . If you really want to take it to the next level, set up a candlelit dinner at your dining room table for an added element of intimacy. By aiming to make the date special and memorable, you’ll help make your boyfriend feel cherished and spoiled. ^{[35]
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Drop subtle hints that you want to see him, figure out his schedule, and plan a day to surprise your long distance boyfriend with a visit. It will help express your love and leave a smile on his face. You’ll need to be careful not to reveal that you plan to visit, though. Figure out when he’ll be free by asking from his friends and family to be extra safe. ^{[36]
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How to Spoil Your Boyfriend Based on His Love Language