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A relationship guide for “Virtuosos”
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Practical, spontaneous, and easygoing—what’s not to love about an ISTP? Also known as the “Virtuoso,” this Myers-Briggs personality type is fearless and an independent problem-solver. ISTPs aren’t afraid to take on a new problem or adventure, but how are they in relationships? Who are they destined to be with? In this article, we’ll tell you everything you need to know about an ISTP’s compatibility, from their best to worst romantic matches.

Things You Should Know

  • ISTPs are the most compatible with other analytical and problem-solving types, like ESTJs, ENTJs, and ENTPs.
  • ISTPs match well with extroverted personality types because their partner’s outgoing nature helps them step outside their comfort zone.
  • ISTPs have a hard time opening up emotionally and value freedom in a relationship, making them the least compatible with INFPs, ENFPs, INFJs, and ENFJs.
Section 1 of 6:

Best Matches for ISTP

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  1. The ultimate match for an ISTP is an ESTJ. Both of these personality types are analytical and perceive the world through a matter-of-fact lens. They process things logically and don’t rely heavily on their emotions, making them a perfect romantic pairing.
    • To bond: Take things one day at a time. Both personalities value the gradual process of dating. [1]
    • Be careful with: Getting to know each other. ISTPs and ESTJs can both be strong-willed and may struggle to open up emotionally.
  2. ISTPs and ENTJs balance each other's faults. Although it may seem opposing on paper, an ENTJ and ISTP make a compatible pair. An ISTP’s ability to listen adheres to an ENTJ’s love for talking. Both are efficient and organized workers who aren’t afraid to get the job done.
    • To bond: Play 20 questions to get to know each other at a surface level.
    • Be careful with: Communication. ISTPs prefer to listen, while ENTJs like to talk—remember to switch roles to get the most out of the relationship.
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  3. An ISTP and ENTP’s combined curiosity is certainly a force to be reckoned with. This relationship pairing is perfect for problem-solving and forming new ideas. Although ISTPs and ENTPs may differ in how they socialize, their love for anything creative ultimately brings them together.
    • To bond: Swap fun facts. ISTPs and ENTPs love blowing people’s minds.
    • Be careful with: Setting boundaries . ISTPs value their time alone, while ENTPs don’t mind being in a crowd. Over time, this could cause conflict.
  4. At the end of the day, ISTPs make suitable pairs for each other. They get each other inside and out, making them ideal companions. They understand each other’s need for alone time and value hard work and creativity. [2]
    • To bond: Live in the moment together. ISTPs value making the most of the day, so jump on every wild and spontaneous date idea.
    • Be careful with: Being too analytical. ISTPs are notorious for being emotionless in decision-making. While this can sometimes be a blessing, it can also be a curse.
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Section 2 of 6:

Worst Matches for ISTP

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  1. Although they’re both introverts, ISTPs and INFPs clash romantically. While ISTPs are analytical and practical, INFPs are idealistic dreamers. An INFP craves romantic intimacy and dreams of a happily ever after. [3] On the other hand, an ISTP values space and freedom. [4] This difference in romantic preference can be a big deal breaker for these personality types.
    • To bond: Do a creative activity together, like painting, writing a story, or going to a museum.
    • Be careful with: Mutual respect. If given enough time, INFPs can make an effort to respect an ISTP’s need for freedom, even if it goes against their ideal version of a partner.
  2. An ENFP’s romantic and hopeful energy can irritate an ISTP. These types are far from compatible because they need different things from their partners. ENFPs want partners they can explore the world and share every waking moment with. [5] On the contrary, ISTPs need a partner who can give them space to grow and thrive on their own. [6]
    • To bond: Do something active together, like hiking or rock climbing.
    • Be careful with: Physical intimacy. Unlike ENFPs, ISTPs need time to warm up to a relationship and value being the one to instigate physical affection.
  3. INFJs value emotional intimacy, while ISTPs don’t. Although both personality types are introverted problem-solvers, they need different things from a romantic partner. INFJs are attracted to core values and emotional connections over physical appearances. [7] ISTPs, on the other hand, struggle to open up emotionally. Physical intimacy is usually the closest they’ll get to an emotional connection in a relationship. [8]
    • To bond: Do a puzzle-solving activity together, like a puzzle or escape room.
    • Be careful with: Asking too many questions. ISTPs have a hard time opening up to people and may put up thicker walls to protect themselves from seeming vulnerable.
  4. An ENFJ’s commitment may be overwhelming for an ISTP. When ENFJs fall in love, they fall in love hard. They’re not afraid to show their emotions and make the first move, and although this may excite an ISTP, it may also terrify them. ISTPs aren’t against sudden romances, but the intensity of an ENFJ’s passion may throw them for a loop. [9]
    • To bond: Do something fun and spontaneous together. ENFJs and ISTPs love a good adventure.
    • Be careful with: Moving too fast. ISTPs aren’t opposed to quick-burning relationships, but they’re unwilling to express their emotions immediately.
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Section 3 of 6:

ISTPs in Love

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  1. These individuals walk to the beat of their own drum. They’re natural problem-solvers and don’t technically need a partner to help them get the job done. Even so, they enjoy having a partner to work with—if only because a relationship gives them more problems to solve. [10]
  2. At their core, ISTPs are analytical and logical. They’re rarely emotional and follow their head over their hearts. Because of this, it can be hard for an ISTP to show affection (even with a significant other). Their love language is acts of service, and they prefer doing hands-on activities together rather than having small talk. [11]
  3. Because of their independent and introverted nature, ISTPs need flexibility in a relationship. While they’re not likely to go off and play the field, they need time alone. An ISTP wants to be able to go places alone and do their own thing. Because of this, they need a partner who’ll trust that they won’t flirt with others behind their back. [12]
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Section 4 of 6:

ISTP Strengths

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  1. Unlike other personality types, ISTPs aren’t afraid to take the next step with their partners. Some might say they move too fast, but in an ISTP’s eyes, they’re taking advantage of a great opportunity! [13]
    • Similarly, ISTPs don’t stick to tradition—they like to mix things up. This may look like moving in or having kids before marriage, or kissing someone on the first date.
  2. Anger rarely comes to an ISTP. This personality type is generous, caring, and accepting, making them ideal partners when it comes to arguments. They respond to conflict analytically and don’t let their emotions get the best of them (even if they disagree with someone). [14]
    • Along with this, ISTPs are excellent problem-solvers. Their practical approach to life lets them see things how they are, and their creativity helps them uncover solutions in any situation.
  3. An ISTP’s creativity isn’t just reserved for their career and hobbies—they also like playing in the bedroom! They may experiment with different positions and toys (as long as their partner is comfortable doing so) to keep their sex life exciting.
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Section 5 of 6:

ISTP Weaknesses

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  1. Because of their practical approach to life, ISTPs are often brutally honest and blunt. They prefer the cold hard truth, and they can sometimes forget others might not. This may cause communication conflicts in relationships as an ISTP partner might feel like their feelings are being dismissed. [15]
  2. An ISTP will likely struggle in a relationship because they value and crave time alone. They’re not a clingy partner and need a partner who trusts them enough to give them space. Because of this, ISTPs can often come across as reserved or secretive. [16]
  3. Although devoted to their partners, ISTPs need space to do what they want to do. They can quickly become restless and may act out on a selfish impulse to satisfy their needs. [17]
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Section 6 of 6:

ISTPs as Parents

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  1. This personality type is all about physical, hands-on learning. They love teaching their children mechanical skills with fun, engaging demonstrations. All in all, an ISTP parent will jump right into showing their kid how to do something. [18]
    • Because of this, ISTP parents are more likely to give their children building blocks, crafts, puzzles, and other hands-on activities during playtime.
    • ISTPs can easily become distracted when playing with their children and may lose track of other responsibilities for the sake of a learning experience or adventure.

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