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Sharp & snappy pickle jokes to share over your next jar
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Sweet, spicy, salty, or sour, pickles make the perfect punchline for a variety of jokes and one-liners. In this article, we’ve jarred up the funniest pickle jokes and puns to get the giggles going (and leave you craving more). Ready to crunch into a world of pickle humor? Read on!

Dill-lightful Pickle Jokes: Top Picks

  • Who’s a pickle’s favorite artist? Salvador Dilli.
  • Why do gherkins giggle a lot? They’re picklish!
  • Where is the Liberty Dill found? In Phila-dill-phia.
  • Why did the pickle blush? It saw the salad dressing!
  • When can you put pickles in the door? When it’s ajar.
  • What’s a baby gherkin’s favorite TV channel? Pickleodeon.
  • How does a cucumber become a pickle? It goes through a jarring experience!
Section 1 of 4:

Pickle Dad Jokes

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  1. Whether you prefer dill, half-sour, bread and butter, or gherkins, there’s a pickle—and pickle-related joke—for everybody! Here are some briny and brilliant dad jokes to keep in your back pocket:
    • What do you call a genius pickle? A brine-iac.
    • How do pickles enjoy a day out? They relish it.
    • Where do pickles go on dates? The salad bar!
    • Why do gherkins giggle a lot? They’re picklish! [1]
    • Who is a pickle’s celebrity crush? Picolas Cage.
    • What’s green and swims in the sea? Moby Pickle.
    • Why do pickles wear glasses? They’re legally brined.
    • Why did the pickle blush? It saw the salad dressing!
    • What is a pickle’s favorite type of workout? Crunches.
    • When can you put pickles in the door? When it’s ajar!
    • What business does a smart pickle open? A dilly-catessen.
    • What’s cold, green, and hangs from the roof? An ice-pickle!
    • What woodwind instrument do cucumbers play? A pickle-o!
    • What do you call a pickle who is a bad loser? A sour pickle!
    • Why are pickles in sandwiches so polite? They’re well-bread!
    • What do you say to a pickle in the morning? “Rise and brine!”
    • What did the pickle say to the lemon? “I relish our time together.”
    • Why are bananas better than pickles? Because they have a-peel.
    • Why did the cucumber need a lawyer? Because it was in a pickle!
    • What’s crunchy, green, and lives in an aquarium? A trop-pickle fish!
    • What happens when you confuse chutney and pickles? You chuckle.
    • What did one cucumber seed say to the other? “We’re in a bit of a pickle.”
    • What did the pickle say to the cucumber? “Come on in, the water’s brine!”
    • What would happen if you got vinegar in your ear? A case of pickled hearing.
    • How does a cucumber become a pickle? It goes through a jarring experience!
    • Why did the gherkin go to school? Because it wanted to be a pickle of all trades!
    • Why shouldn’t you shoot pool using a pickle? Because you’ll find the cue-cumbersome.
    • Why did Costco stop selling 5-gallon jars of pickles? Shelving them was cucumbersome.
    • What did the pickle do when it won the championship? He just stood there to relish the moment.
    • What’s the difference between a pickle and a therapist? If you don’t know, you should stop talking to your pickle!
    • How are a bunch of soon-to-be pickles and a heavy pool stick similar? You either have some cucumber or a cumbersome cue.
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Section 2 of 4:

Dill Pickle Jokes

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  1. These sharp and snappy pickle jokes are kind of a big dill. Crunchy, briny, and full of flavor, dill pickles are the perfect subject for a plethora of jokes. Here are some silly options you’ll absolutely relish in:
    • Who’s a pickle’s favorite artist? Salvador Dilli. [2]
    • What is a pickle’s favorite show? Dill or no Dill.
    • What do you call a pickle doctor? A dill pusher.
    • Where is the Liberty Dill found? In Phila-dill-phia.
    • Where do pickles go to buy a car? The dillership.
    • What’s a pickle’s favorite book? To Dill a Mockingbird.
    • What’s a pickle’s life philosophy? Never a dill moment.
    • What’s a pickle’s favorite type of fish? A dill-icious one!
    • What did the arrogant pickle say? “I’m kind of a big dill.”
    • What’s a dill pickle’s favorite holiday song? Dill the Halls!
    • What do you say to a pickle that’s freaking out? “Just dill.”
    • On what radio station would you hear Bob Dill-on? Vlasic rock.
    • What do you do when a pickle wants to play cards? Dill ‘em in.
    • Why are pickles so cool about everything? They just dill with it!
    • What do you call a pickle you buy at a great price? A sweet dill.
    • What do you call a pickle that got run over on the road? Road dill.
    • What do you call a pickle from the southern backwoods? A hill-dilly.
    • Where’s a pickle’s favorite place to go in London? Pickle-dilly Square.
    • What did one dill pickle say to the other at the gym? “Let’s get shredded!”
    • What do you call a pickle that always knows the score? A dill-igent observer.
    • What do you call a pickle that always cares for its work and duties? Dill-igent!
    • Did you hear about that crazy pickle who thought he was a flower? What a daff-o-dill!
    • Why do dill pickles make great detectives? They always know how to get out of a pickle!
    • Why do dill pickles make great comedians? They know how to give you that classic crunchline!
    • What did the pickle say when he walked into the casino and sat down at the card table? “Dill me in.”
Section 3 of 4:

Pickle Jokes for Kids

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  1. Make everyone laugh with these fresh and kid-friendly pickle jokes. Looking for a pickle joke for your real-life baby gherkin? These kid-friendly jokes are sweet, sour, and sure to get the giggles going:
    • What is green and flies? Super Pickle!
    • What’s a pickle’s favorite sport? Pickleball!
    • What’s green and has 2 wheels? A motorpickle.
    • What is green and pecks at trees? Woody Wood-pickle.
    • What’s a baby cucumber’s favorite toy? Pickle Me Elmo.
    • What’s a baby gherkin’s favorite TV channel? Pickleodeon. [3]
    • When did the pickle cross the road? Because it was green.
    • How do you make a pickle laugh? You tell it a dill-ightful joke!
    • Why are pickles so jealous? They are always green with envy.
    • What do you call a pickle lullaby? A cucumber slumber number.
    • How do you know if a pickle is happy? It’s all smiles…no spears!
    • What did the pickle say to the cat? Nothing. Pickles can’t talk, silly!
    • What do you get when you cross a pickle with an alligator? A crocodill.
    • What’s red, green, and guides Santa’s sleigh? Rudolph the red-nosed pickle!
    • What happens when life gives you pickles instead of lemons? You dill with it.
    • What’s black, white, green, black, and white? Two skunks fighting over a pickle.
    • Why do pickles hate running races? Because they always get bread and buttered!
    • What did the hamburger say to the pickle when they met? “You are absolutely dill-icious.”
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Section 4 of 4:

Pickle Puns

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  1. If there’s an opportunity to incorporate pickle-related humor into your daily conversation, take it! The following lines put a sweet and salty spin on classic phrases and idioms you love. Here are some dill-lightful options:
    • Let’s make a dill. [4]
    • You are such a dill-light.
    • Dill me in on the details.
    • Brine your own business!
    • I’m dill-lighted to meet you.
    • It’s time to dill with the facts.
    • Brine over matter every time.
    • That’s a tough dill to swallow.
    • Pickle it up! We’re running late.
    • Hey you, you’re kind of a big dill!
    • Don’t forget to relish the moment!
    • You brine so much joy into my life.
    • I’m feeling totally spear-itual today.
    • That one condition is a dill-breaker.
    • Dill you believe it? I found the answer!
    • You mean the whole brine world to me.
    • Quit gherkin around and get back to work!
    • I can’t pickle a favorite—they’re all so good!
    • Why don’t you pickle someone your own size?
    • Cucumber is one vegetable that is always in a pickle.
    • I had to choose between a gherkin and Vlasic. I was in a dill-emma.
    • A gas station was selling pickles two-for-one—it was the dill of the day.
    • I once tripped on a pickle. I’m over it now, but it was a big dill at the time.
    • I watched a documentary last night about how pickles are made. It was jarring.
    • I accidentally dropped a pickle in my Hawaiian punch. I guess it’s trop-pickle now!
    • Every day, the pickle sees a green vegetable at the jar who is always waiting for his turn. It must be a queue-cumber.
    • Brining pickles makes them last much longer than fresh cucumbers, but packing them in an air-tight container—that’s what really seals the dill.

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      • To come up with your own creative joke , experiment with pickle-related terminology. You could replace a word in a common phrase with “dill,” “brine,” “gherkin,” “spear,” or “cucumber,” or use these terms as puns or play on their double meanings.
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