Q&A for How to Apologize to a Girl

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  • Question
    Is it good to apologize to a girl?
    Maya Diamond, MA
    Relationship Coach
    Maya Diamond is a Dating and Relationship Coach in Berkeley, CA. She has 15 years of experience helping singles stuck in frustrating dating patterns find internal security, heal their past, and create healthy, loving, and lasting partnerships. She received her Master's in Somatic Psychology from the California Institute of Integral Studies in 2009.
    Relationship Coach
    Expert Answer
    If you screwed up, it's probably a good idea to apologize! Come from a place of open vulnerability and apologize when the both of you are calm. This is the best shot you have at getting her to accept your apology.
  • Question
    What did the guy do to the girl to make him have to do all this stuff?
    Community Answer
    It can be anything, from being mean, embarrassing her, anything that truly upsets her. It's better to apologize than not to apologize at all.
  • Question
    How can I explain my interest to stay with a girl when we're in a fight?
    Community Answer
    Still send goodnight texts, good morning text, and show her you still care about her well-being. Even if it's just "Night," through a message, it still shows you care even if you don't want to talk.
  • Question
    If I have ignored her for 10 days without any reason and now she wants an apology, what do I do?
    Community Answer
    You should go to her and pull her aside just to get the two of you alone and just apologize for ignoring her. Admit that you were being an idiot and that you will never do it again.
  • Question
    How should someone pick a good outfit for apologizing?
    Community Answer
    Don't wear colors that the person receiving the apology doesn't like. Wear an outfit that shows who you are and flatters your body.
  • Question
    How can I say sorry to a girl without touching her?
    Community Answer
    You don't have to touch her to say you're sorry. You can -- and probably should -- maintain your distance, keep eye contact and apologize like you mean it. If she's really mad at you, touching can make her more angry at you.
  • Question
    What if my crush never forgives me?
    Community Answer
    Get her some roses and tell her you really want to make things straight again. Give her time to think it over and ask her to give you a second chance to earn her trust.
  • Question
    How do I tell someone sorry after calling her fat?
    Community Answer
    Apologize and say it was inappropriate.
  • Question
    How can I say sorry if I make her feel uncomfortable?
    Community Answer
    Apologize immediately when you do something wrong and then give her space. Let her call the shots for awhile. If you make her feel uncomfortable, then continuing to pressure her into talking to you is only going to make the issue worse.
  • Question
    I made a girl I'm interested in feel uncomfortable by giving her a bottle of perfume. How can I change her feelings about me?
    Community Answer
    First, I would apologize for crossing a line and making her feel uncomfortable. Explain to her that it was not your intention to upset her. Then, ask if she would still be okay talking to you and developing a friendship. If she says yes, then take things slow and hold off on any more gifts or showy displays of affection. Don't try to rush her into anything romantic.
  • Question
    How do I apologize or regain her trust if she does not want to be alone with me?
    Community Answer
    You don't have to be alone with someone to apologize. But if she doesn't want to talk to you at all, write her a letter telling her how sorry you are, and/or send some flowers. Make sure to let her know that you will give her space, but you'd like to talk things over and apologize in person if she is comfortable with that.
  • Question
    My crush blocked me on WhatsApp and is irritated with me - what shall I do?
    Community Answer
    You should just let her/him be. Give her/him a few weeks to cool off.
  • Question
    I have ignored her, how should I apologise?
    Community Answer
    Say you're sorry that you ignored her and let her know that it won't happen again in the future. Promise that you will make an effort to be more attentive.
  • Question
    Should I apologize to the girl after I told a girl that I want to be her friend and she does not reply back?
    Community Answer
    No, because you said what you had to say. Just like she would want you to respect her decisions. She should respect it as well.
  • Question
    How can I say sorry to my crush for being weird and obsessive? She doesn't want to talk to or interact with me at all. I just want to be friends with her, but she's mad at me. What should I say?
    Community Answer
    If you can get her to talk to you briefly, apologize for whatever you did that made her uncomfortable. Don't make excuses for yourself. If she really doesn't want to talk to you, that is her right and you need to respect it. Nobody owes you their friendship or attention, especially not someone who you've already upset with your behavior. Give her a brief, simple apology and tell her that you'd like to be friends, but it's her choice and the ball is in her court.
  • Question
    I said something bad about my crush. I don't really know what to say to her because she doesn't want to talk to me and I can also tell that she wants nothing to do with me. What should I say to her?
    Community Answer
    You should wait a couple days and let her cool down. After that, you should apologize in person, because apologizing any other way could seem like a cop out.Try to explain why you did it without making it seem like an excuse, and let her respond, even if it's just to insult you. After all, the apology is to make her feel better, not for you.
  • Question
    How do I apologize by text message?
    Community Answer
    Text is not the best way to apologize. If at all possible, do it in person. If text is your only option, full explain why you're sorry and try to follow up in person as soon as possible.
  • Question
    How can I say sorry if I scolded her boyfriend?
    Community Answer
    Ideally, you should apologize to the boyfriend and tell him to tell his girlfriend that you're sorry if you offended her in any way. If you need to do it the other way around, just tell her "I'm sorry about the way I overreacted with your boyfriend the other day, please tell him I'm sorry."
  • Question
    I had a girlfriend who lived with me, but I couldn't marry her, so we broke up. How do I apologize to her?
    Community Answer
    Marriage is a commitment. It shouldn't be rushed. If you care that much, walk straight up to her and tell her how you feel.
  • Question
    I called her the B word. I wrote her a letter. What do I do now?
    Community Answer
    Did you apologize in that letter? If so, that's a good start. You could next try to approach her and apologize in person (which takes more guts and is therefore likely to make more of an impression).
  • Question
    How do I say 'I'm sorry' after she tried to make up with me but I pushed her away?
    Community Answer
    Before trying again, try finding out from her friends or sibling(s) how she's reacting. If she's mad about the whole situation, it would probably be best to wait a bit longer. If there aren't any hard feelings, just apologize sincerely, and maybe give her her favorite flowers as well.
  • Question
    Is it necessary to hug the girl when apologizing, even when we're not close friends or even friends?
    Jesus Millan Hernandez
    Community Answer
    Well, it depends on who it is. Is it a classmate, a neighbor, or a person you just know? But, no it's not necessary to hug someone you don't know, and if they hate being hugged, that could make the problem worse. Apologizing should be sufficient.
  • Question
    How can I apologize after ignoring a girl for a long time?
    Community Answer
    First, say, “I’m really sorry, I was just not being very respectful. Ignoring you was not smart, and I just want to apologize for it.” Next, ask if she forgives you. Proceed from there once you have her answer. Be aware she might be reticent to trust you, so give her some time to think it over.
  • Question
    If I've already apologized to a girl over a phone call, should I call her back? How long should I wait before placing the second phone call?
    Community Answer
    No--apologize once, then give her time to process her feelings. She will get in contact with you when she's ready to forgive you or discuss it further. Sitting with your uncomfortable feelings can be a good deterrent to repeating the behavior in the future. There's nothing you can do to change the incident that happened in the past and you've tried to rectify the situation in the present by apologizing, so now all you can do is try to analyze the motivation behind your behavior and work on improving yourself to prevent future recurrences.
  • Question
    I don't think she is mad at me or anything but I just want to apologize to be polite. I accidentally hurt her physically and she took it well. How should I apologize?
    Community Answer
    Keep saying sorry now and then, for just a week or two. Stop saying it if she feels annoyed by hearing this, as that will only make it worse. Give her some flowers or a living plant as a gesture of contrition, then move on together. Be careful in future!
  • Question
    I really screwed things up. I did something horrible. It's been 3 weeks and she doesn't want to be around me. But I still want to be her friend. What do I do?
    I_l1ke_gam3s
    Community Answer
    She probably cannot trust you. Most girls are sensitive and really cannot take insults, so try to apologize, and remember that you cannot force her to keep the friendship.
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