Q&A for How to Get Over Being Lovesick

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Should I delete all his texts?

Julia Yacoob, PhD
Clinical Psychologist
Dr. Julia Yacoob is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist practicing in New York City. She specializes in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) for adults coping with a variety of symptoms and life stressors. Dr. Yacoob earned an MS and Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology from Rutgers University, and pursued specialized training at Weill Cornell Medical College, New York Presbyterian Hospital, Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center, the Institute for Behavior Therapy, and Bellevue Hospital Cancer Center. Dr. Yacoob is a member of the American Psychological Association, Women’s Mental Health Consortium, NYC Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Association, and Association for Cognitive and Behavioral Therapies.

Julia Yacoob, PhD

Clinical Psychologist

Expert Answer

That's a good idea! Data actually shows that removing your associations and connections with a person makes it easier to recover from your feelings for them. You could even go a step further and delete him from social media, and decrease the number of times you talk in person.

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Question

How do you stop thinking about someone who rejected you?

Julia Yacoob, PhD
Clinical Psychologist
Dr. Julia Yacoob is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist practicing in New York City. She specializes in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) for adults coping with a variety of symptoms and life stressors. Dr. Yacoob earned an MS and Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology from Rutgers University, and pursued specialized training at Weill Cornell Medical College, New York Presbyterian Hospital, Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center, the Institute for Behavior Therapy, and Bellevue Hospital Cancer Center. Dr. Yacoob is a member of the American Psychological Association, Women’s Mental Health Consortium, NYC Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Association, and Association for Cognitive and Behavioral Therapies.

Julia Yacoob, PhD

Clinical Psychologist

Expert Answer

Everyone has a different approach to it, and you should try what is going to be the most healing thing for you, whether it's being alone, mourning, having space or socializing more.

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Question

What if you have someone who likes you like but you can't be a couple?

Community Answer

If you're not able to date the person for some reason, it may be best to cut off contact with them and avoid them as much as possible. For example, if the person is already in a relationship, then seeing them often is just going to make it harder to get over them.

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Question

What if I was dumped, but the person still wants to be my friend?

Community Answer

You don't have to be their friend if you don't feel comfortable with it. Be honest with them and let them know how you feel, such as by saying something like, "I'm not ready for us to be friends and I need more time on my own."

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Question

What does it mean when you're lovesick?

Drew Hawkins1

Community Answer

When someone says that they're lovesick, it's kind of like being heartbroken, but with a slight difference. Heartbreak generally refers to having someone you're in a relationship suddenly end things or cheat on you with somebody else, breaking your heart. Lovesickness can occur after someone rejects you, or if you feel like you may be in love with somebody who doesn't feel the same way. You can also be lovesick if you're really lonely and wish you had someone who loved you romantically.

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Question

How long does it take to get over lovesickness?

Drew Hawkins1

Community Answer

Everyone deals with feelings like lovesickness differently. For instance, someone may immediately feel better if they find something that they enjoy doing to distract themselves such as joining a new club or getting into a new hobby. Unfortunately, some people may feel lovesick for years, and may feel like it will never end. But, no matter how lovesick you feel, you can work to get rid of the negative feelings by focusing on yourself and finding happiness in other places.

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Question

Can you be lovesick in a relationship?

Drew Hawkins1

Community Answer

If you're romantically involved with somebody, it is possible to have feelings of lovesickness if you're not feeling satisfied in your current relationship. You can work with your partner to try to improve communication so you can both work through any issues you're having that may be making you feel lovesick. If you don't think there's anything you can do to fix your relationship, it may be best for the two of you to go your separate ways before you both regret it.

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