Q&A for How to Stop Lying to Yourself

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What are some examples of lying to yourself?

Christina Stathopoulos, PCC, ACCC
Certified Leadership & Life Coach
Christina Stathopoulos is a Certified Leadership and Life Coach and the Founder of Hear Her Roar, a coaching service for women leaders. With more than five years of experience, she specializes in leadership development, relationships, empowerment, public speaking, and work-life balance. Christina holds a BA in Chemistry and English from Mount Holyoke College. She has also received her Professional Certified Coach Credential from The International Coaching Federation and Accomplishment Coaching Certification from Accomplishment Coaching.

Christina Stathopoulos, PCC, ACCC

Certified Leadership & Life Coach

Expert Answer

An example of lying to yourself could be feeling empty or unfulfilled, even if you have a stable job. You could also be stuck in a relationship that doesn't feel meaningful to you.

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How do you get your spouse to get out of the past and live in the present? How do I get him to stop dwelling on my past mistakes and lies?

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Staff Answer
This answer was written by one of our trained team of researchers who validated it for accuracy and comprehensiveness.

wikiHow Staff Editor

Staff Answer

Unfortunately, you can't really change someone else's thoughts and feelings. The best thing you can do is apologize sincerely for your past behaviors and make a genuine effort to change. If you and your spouse are still struggling to move forward, you might benefit from couples counseling to help you work through these issues as a team.

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I feel fake and lie all the time. What do I do?

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This answer was written by one of our trained team of researchers who validated it for accuracy and comprehensiveness.

wikiHow Staff Editor

Staff Answer

Recognizing that you have trouble being honest is an important first step! It might help to think about why you lie. For example, if you lie to make yourself look better to others, think about other ways that you might boost your confidence and learn to value yourself more. If you're really struggling with your self-image, talking to a therapist might help.

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How can I not be so down on myself?

Community Answer

Think about the positive things in your life and remember that you are human like everyone else.

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How do I control telling lies?

Community Answer

When you tell a lie, immediately stop and say, "That's not the truth," and tell the truth.

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I have lied to my boyfriend multiple times and he has given me so many chances. Every time he confronts me about it, I lie. I want to have his trust back, but how do I do that?

Community Answer

Be honest with him. Tell him that you have reflected on your lies and that you want to change. He will hopefully be supportive.

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Is thinking "I'm going to be a Nickelodeon star" a lie?

Community Answer

Not necessarily. It's okay to have dreams and goals, as long as you really work towards them instead of just waiting for something to happen.

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