Q&A for How to Talk to People

It's good to be interesting, but don't forget to be interested. The whole point of a date is to share and connect, to have a dialogue, not a monologue. Instead of focusing on impressing the other person, see if there's a connection with them by sharing back and forth.

It depends on what you consider awkward, but I’d practice not fidgeting, sitting or standing with confidence, regulating your breathing and speech rate, keeping a pleasant facial expression and maintaining eye contact. It helps to practice these things with another person as well.

Keep a few small topic ideas and conversation starters in your phone. If you get stuck, take a quick look at your notes. It might also be helpful to practice the conversation starters with someone to get comfortable with the questions and to help you remember them.

Try these two articles for some good tips: How to Meet New People and How to talk to strangers .

Get involved in something you love, as it will be force you to be more talkative. Get around people with similar interests that you feel comfortable talking about.

With the exception of some species of bird, pets cannot speak to you as they cannot talk. That said, some will pay attention or at least show interest when you speak to them. Tortoises however, are not known to do this and generally prefer to do their own thing.

Write it down somewhere so you can try to remember to ask it the next time you see the person.

Ask open-ended questions, such as: What classes do you have? What are your hobbies? Do you play any sports? What did you do over the weekend? If you have anything in common with them, then tell them, and the conversation will flow from there. If you know what their interests are, ask questions about these; that's a sure-fire way for them to open up to you.

Try not to worry too much about it, as fake body language can make you look more awkward. You can, however, try to leave your arms uncrossed while talking to others; this will make you appear more open.

Try to read other people's facial and verbal cues. If someone is glancing around, looking confused, or smiling in an uncomfortable/false way, you might be saying or doing something awkward.

Pay attention to their responses and expressions. Usually you can tell fairly easily if someone is annoyed. They may seem impatient, disinterested in you or the conversation, or irritated. If they don't seem to be enjoying the conversation and aren't very engaged in it (i.e., give short/mindless responses and don't make much of an effort to keep the conversation going), they are likely either annoyed or bored.

Tell the people you are talking to. Mostly being honest about how you feel can make others feel more comfortable around you because they often feel the same way.

When you sense that things are getting awkward, start a new topic, one that is interesting or funny, or tell her a funny or intriguing story that draws her in. Also show that you are comfortable around her, maybe if she sees this she will feel less awkward and stick around longer. When guys are comfortable around them, girls feel more comfortable.

If your stories are built upon the need to fit in, set them aside. You may seem like you're trying too hard to be heard. The best way to rope the attention of someone right away is to ask them about themselves, which will in turn open a window for you to express yourself and tell your cool stories. It seems backwards, but if that person feels like you are truly listening to them, they will often return the same favor by listening to you.

Some people just don't care, so don't bother too much with them. Sometimes people aren't interested in this particular conversation, that's OK. You can say things like "Yeah, I know it's not super interesting, but I'd just like to run this last thing by you, if that's OK." If you're just chatting and the other person seems disconnected, ask them about something that interests them.

Try to focus on the conversation and not your nervousness. Most likely, nervousness is making you feel like you need to run away. You can practice active listening by focusing and understanding what the other people are saying, not what you are going to say back. For emotional and social support, you may want to bring a close friend, relative, or someone that you feel comfortable with to practice.

If people aren't invested in the conversation or paying attention, you are talking too much about yourself.

It's perfectly fine and not weird to mention that you've heard about them. Just say something like, "Oh, you're Joan's friend, she talks about you all the time." Then just talk to them like you would talk to anyone else. Obviously, if you've heard anything negative about them, from a friend or anyone else, just keep that to yourself.

Start by saying how you have been busy, and say sorry for not keeping in touch.

Talking to people cannot suddenly make you not a virgin. However, if you talk to someone and end up dating them, as long as they are comfortable, you could get closer to not being virgin.

It can be difficult to enter into an entire group, so see if you can engage just two or three of them in a separate conversation. Just say hi, ask how they're doing, listen to their conversations, and tie in with that. You could also consider just letting them know how you feel, but with a wink and a smile. "Hey guys, what's up? Sometimes I feel you think I'm rude. I'm not sure where that came from, but I'm sorry I came across that way. Anyway, whatchadoin?"

Ignore them. They're trying to get attention by being disruptive. If you point it out or otherwise show you've noticed what they're doing, they'll be encouraged and continue this rude behavior.

One of the ways to get noticed is to wear attractive but formal clothing that is suitable to work in.

They key in any relationship is to be at the same level. If you like a guy, let him know ASAP. That way he can see if he develops feelings for you as well while you get to know each other. This applies to love as well as friendship. In your case, the news is not good, unfortunately. If he still hasn't responded, then it means he doesn't like you back. When you go back to school, just be polite and short. You can say hello, how was your summer, stuff like that, but the ball is in his court. If he hasn't gotten back to you by now, it's not going to happen anymore. Or, you could ask him why he hasn't responded.

Try to know what they like or are into. You could just simply ask them, "Hey! What are you guys talking about?" They should answer, because they're your friends.

If the person is clearly engaged in doing something (paperwork, talking to someone else, etc.) or is moving purposefully down a hall or across a room like he or she is heading somewhere, that person is probably busy. You can always ask if you're unsure, though: "Do you have a minute?"

Talk to them and interact as you would around a friend. If you have a crush on them show them that you are interested in them.

Stop trying so hard and be yourself. Are you a gentleman? If so then you shouldn't have to try to talk like one. The way to be authentic is to not be fake. Be real and honest with people. Do not put on a false face to appeal to others.

You can learn the language, or at least some basic conversational phrases. You could also communicate via text and use something like Google Translate to translate their phrases and your own into the correct languages.

Try to ask them about what kind of music they like, which country they'd love to visit and why, which language they want to learn, what instrument they want to listen to or learn, etc.