11 Things to Expect When Dating an Aquarius: Why It's Hard to Date an Aquarius

Co-authored by Stina Garbis and Jessica Gibson

Last Updated: December 18, 2024 Fact Checked

Aquarius can seem like a tricky sign to date, but why is that? An Aquarius can catch your eye with their unique perspective, but you might feel like you'll never be more than just friends. You're definitely not the only person to struggle with dating an Aquarius ! To help, read through our complete guide to figure out why they do the things they do.

1

They may stall you in the friend zone.

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Aquarius might keep you as a friend because they don't know how to make a move. This sign is all about getting to know you. They want to be totally comfortable with you before pursuing a relationship. Aquarius tends to blur the line between love and friendship.
- The best thing you can do is be their friend without attempting a romantic relationship. Once you two really know each other and feel completely at ease, you can suggest a simple date—don't overwhelm them with romantic gestures. Just do something together that's fun and low-pressure. Think about getting ice cream or seeing a movie.

2

They’re unwilling to compromise.

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Conflict with an Aquarius is a challenge because they're so stubborn. If your Aquarius has made up their mind, look out! They're inflexible once they've decided that they've got the right idea or way to do something, so it's really hard to convince them to see your point of view.
- Sometimes, it's better to let your Aquarius see that you're right rather than having an argument or trying to convince them. For instance, if you know that they'd tell you the best way to plant your garden, but you want to do it differently, go ahead and do it your way. Then, you can explain why you think your layout was the best.

3

They're defensive.

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Aquarius is quick to assume the worst, which you might think is irrational. At times, it might even seem like they're looking for an excuse to push you away. They have strong egos and they pride themselves on being unique. Aquarius would rather believe that you just don't understand their unusual perspective.
- When you argue or have a heated discussion with your Aquarius, avoid using words that blame them. Instead, tell them how you're feeling.
- For example, instead of saying, "You always cancel on me at the last minute. You're just trying to make me feel bad," say, "I'm so disappointed when our plans don't work out. I really look forward to spending time with you."

4

They take a long time to open up.

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Aquarius can't be rushed and they'll move at their own pace. You might feel like the relationship is going nowhere. From an Aquarius viewpoint, they just want to know the real you before they share themselves with you. Honesty is super important to them and you can't force their trust.
- Be genuine in all your interactions, so your Aquarius feels like they really know you.
- Establish this solid foundation before you try to develop a romantic relationship. Work on creating trust by matching their communication style and following through on promises.

5

They don’t share their feelings.

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Aquarius keep to themselves, so you don't know how they feel about you. Aquarius is often described as icy or emotionless which is a little unfair. They're actually a highly sensitive sign. They just don't reveal their emotions. You might feel frustrated in a relationship where your partner doesn't give you a clue about how they're feeling. ^{[1]
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- If you adjust your expectations, you'll have a much better time connecting with an Aquarius. Remind yourself to just enjoy the company of your Aquarius and don't push for a long-term, serious relationship. Keep the relationship lighthearted and fun.

6

They need a lot of personal space.

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Aquarius needs room, so you wonder if they want to be in a relationship. Air signs, especially Aquarius, need lots of time to themselves. This might mean you don't see them for days. If you're the type of person who needs a lot of support or reassurance, an Aquarius might come off as too distant for a relationship to work.
- While it's important to respect an Aquarius's needs, you should also communicate yours. If you need more interaction or support, tell them. You could say, "I know you're stressed out, but I haven't seen you all week. I've been feeling pretty lonely."

7

They aren't romantic.

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To Aquarius, love is a theory, not something they're actively looking for. If you're looking for a partner who wears their heart on their sleeve, Aquarius is not for you. In fact, romantic gestures like giving them flowers, going out to fancy restaurants, or putting flower petals on the bed are more likely to make them feel awkward or uncomfortable. ^{[2]
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- This isn't to say that Aquarius isn't a passionate sign! You may be surprised by their intensity in the bedroom.
- Find ways to be a comfort to your Aquarius—offer a hug after a tough day or be the person they snuggle up with on the couch.

8

They put their friends before their relationship.

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Aquarius can make you feel like you're not as important as their friends. This can really hurt! Whether it's canceling on you to be there for their friends or bringing friends along to your dates, you may be frustrated with your Aquarius's priorities.
- Aquarius will start spending more time with their friends if they feel like the relationship is getting dull or too routine. To put the focus back on your relationship, spice things up a little with exciting dates or activities. You might surprise your Aquarius with tickets to go ziplining or rock climbing.

9

They're not the best communicators.

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Aquarius can go radio silent, so you have no idea what's going on. While some astrological signs are fine with lack of communication, you may not like it if you stop hearing from your partner. It's easy to assume that it's because something's wrong, but Aquarius can stop communicating even when things are going well.
- Remind yourself that Aquarius values space and that includes interacting through texts or phone calls. Don't overwhelm them by checking in. Instead, wait until they reach out to you.

10

They don't want to work as a team.

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To Aquarius, individuality is more important than being in a relationship. Your Aquarius would rather stand out in a crowd for being edgy, stylish, or shocking than settle down into a reliable, steady relationship. When it comes to facing challenges together, they don't want to work as partners. ^{[3]
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- Reassure your Aquarius by doing things on your own. Continue to pursue your own interests and passions, so they see that you're still a unique individual, too.

11

They dislike expectations in a relationship.

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Aquarius is an air sign that feels trapped by the needs of a relationship. They'd rather do their own thing than be accountable to someone. Your Aquarius might look panicked or scared if you start making plans or talking about the future. They simply don't want you to rely on them. ^{[4]
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- Try to keep your relationship as casual as possible and never expect your Aquarius to do something without talking to them. For instance, instead of assuming that they'll spend the holidays with your family, casually ask if they want to swing by and say hi or if they'd rather sit the event out.

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What is Aquarius' love language?

Stina Garbis
Psychic Astrologer
Reverend Stina Garbis is a Psychic Astrologer and the Owner of Psychic Stina. With over 30 years of experience, she specializes in providing personal and professional advice through astrology and tarot card readings. Reverend Stina has experience working with high-profile celebrities, sports figures, politicians, and CEOs. She has been featured in many publications, including Bustle, Vice, The New York Post, and Readers’ Digest and she also has a 200k+ following on TikTok. Stina holds an Ordained Minister License from The International Metaphysical Ministry University Seminary.

Stina Garbis

Psychic Astrologer

Expert Answer

An Aquarius person needs a lover who can also be a friend. They need to be casual about commitment and not fussy over pushing the relationship.

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11 Things to Expect When Dating an Aquarius: Why It's Hard to Date an Aquarius

Steps

They may stall you in the friend zone.

They’re unwilling to compromise.

They're defensive.

They take a long time to open up.

They don’t share their feelings.

They need a lot of personal space.

They aren't romantic.

They put their friends before their relationship.

They're not the best communicators.

They don't want to work as a team.

They dislike expectations in a relationship.

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