Sentimental: “Ladies and gentlemen, please join me in a toast to the newly-wedded couple. I give you Mr. and Mrs. Johnson!” “Here’s to the long, loving, and happy life you’re about to start together. Let’s raise our glasses to the bride and groom!” “It’s been a huge honor to be your best man. To the bride and groom!” “Let’s wish them health, wealth, and happiness for the rest of their lives. To the happy couple!” “Let’s hear it for my brother and his beautiful bride!” “I’m so honored to have been a part of your special day. Here’s to both of you!” Funny: “And finally, as someone who’s lived with Jeff for several years, I have one last piece of advice for the bride: never let him cook for you. To the happy couple!” “Here’s wishing you the two things you need for a successful marriage: a sense of humour and selective hearing!” “I can’t wait for you to start your lives together in your new home, complete with an attic suite for me to live out my bachelordom. Here’s to the happy couple!” “Here’s to the bride and groom, and Anna, if you ever need help keeping him in line, you know who to call.” “And finally, to the bride: Welcome to the family! Now you’ll really get to see how weird we are!”