Q&A for How to Break Up with Someone You Love

It's really just personal. If you’re not over it, you may not be figuring out the lessons and the blessings that came from it. Everyone in our lives is here for a reason. They're either a blessing or a lesson, and breakups usually offer both. If you’re not over it, you probably haven’t done the work. You haven’t figured out why this happened for you.

One thing that is important is to feel all of your feelings. We really try to rush through that process of grieving, but there is a true grieving process that happens in a breakup just like if you lost somebody to death. When a loved one dies, you go through those five stages of grief; and when you go through a breakup, you also go through those five stages of grief. So let yourself feel it. Don’t cover it up with drugs or alcohol, or overeating or avoiding or just getting into another relationship. You really need to process it and heal.

Go to therapy. Read personal growth books. One great book is Expectation Hangover by Christine Hassler. She walks you through a lot of different exercises about what to do when something that you expected would make you happy or something that you expected would happen doesn't go your way.

Inevitably breaking up with someone will always hurt, so try to be understanding. Ask your partner about the situation where you think they lied. See if they admit it. If someone is cheating on you, for instance, it is not your job to protect them or their feelings.You need to focus on your own needs.

That is a difficult situation.Try to reach out and make friends at school or work to help you through this tough time. You can also search for a support group for people ending a relationship, either online or in person. You could start a class that you might enjoy just for fun, like pottery, to meet new people.