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How Insecure Am I?

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Do you sometimes feel uncomfortable in your own skin or like you’re not good enough? If so, it may be because you’re insecure. Insecurity is a state of uncertainty or inadequacy and can make you doubt yourself. We know this feeling can be anything but fun, which is why we’re here to help—you’re not alone! Answer these questions to learn how insecure you may be and what you can do to boost your confidence.

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Questions Overview

1. Do you often have a hard time saying “no”?
  1. Yes
  2. Sometimes
  3. Not really
  4. No
2. Are you usually embarrassed in public?
  1. Yes
  2. Sometimes
  3. Not really
  4. No
3. Do you often feel like you’re not good enough?
  1. Yes
  2. Sometimes
  3. Not really
  4. No
4. Are you constantly trying to please others (even if it doesn’t make you happy)?
  1. Yes
  2. Sometimes
  3. Not really
  4. No
5. Do you constantly think you can’t do anything right?
  1. Yes
  2. Sometimes
  3. Not really
  4. No
6. Do you frequently compare yourself to others?
  1. Yes
  2. Sometimes
  3. Not really
  4. No
7. Do you think negatively when you look in the mirror?
  1. Yes
  2. Sometimes
  3. Not really
  4. No
8. Do you often think people don’t like you?
  1. Yes
  2. Sometimes
  3. Not really
  4. No
9. Would you say you’re overly competitive?
  1. Yes
  2. Sometimes
  3. Not really
  4. No
10. Do you often treat others poorly (even if you don’t mean to)?
  1. Yes
  2. Sometimes
  3. Not really
  4. No
11. Do you have a hard time trusting people?
  1. Yes
  2. Sometimes
  3. Not really
  4. No
12. Are you overly sensitive to criticism?
  1. Yes
  2. Sometimes
  3. Not really
  4. No
13. Are you often jealous of other people?
  1. Yes
  2. Sometimes
  3. Not really
  4. No

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Being insecure can feel awful; you might battle uncomfortable, negative, and even hopeless feelings on the daily. But rest assured, your feelings are actually totally normal. Even the most confident-seeming people you know struggle with insecurity\u2014it\u2019s just part of being human! And what\u2019s more, insecurity is something we can all chip away at over time. If you put your mind to it, eventually you\u2019ll see yourself as the vibrant, incredible person that you already are. How can you get started working through those untrue, insecure thoughts and feelings? We\u2019ve got your back. Check out our guides on building self-confidence to get started.","edit_links":[{"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Build-Self-Confidence"},{"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Stop-Being-Insecure,-and-Just-Love-You"}],"link_data":[{"title":"How to Increase Your Self Confidence with Positive Daily Practices","id":22075,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Build-Self-Confidence","image":"\/images\/thumb\/a\/a2\/Build-Self-Confidence-Step-20-Version-4.jpg\/-crop-200-200-200px-Build-Self-Confidence-Step-20-Version-4.jpg","alt":"How to Increase Your Self Confidence with Positive Daily Practices"},{"title":"How to Stop Being Insecure, and Just Love You","id":590336,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Stop-Being-Insecure,-and-Just-Love-You","image":"\/images\/thumb\/1\/17\/Stop-Being-Insecure%2C-and-Just-Love-You-Step-14-Version-3.jpg\/-crop-200-200-200px-Stop-Being-Insecure%2C-and-Just-Love-You-Step-14-Version-3.jpg","alt":"How to Stop Being Insecure, and Just Love You"}],"minimum":0},{"text":"You may be insecure.","meaning":"Based on your responses, it sounds like you\u2019re insecure more often than you\u2019d like. You likely can\u2019t say you never feel sure of yourself, but doubt is what haunts your thoughts the most. You might struggle to look at yourself in the mirror, raise your hand in class, or speak your mind. Perhaps you\u2019re scared of what others will think of you or worried about saying the wrong thing. Either way, you often doubt your skills and abilities.Being insecure can feel awful; you might battle uncomfortable, negative, and even hopeless feelings on the daily. But rest assured, your feelings are actually totally normal. Even the most confident-seeming people struggle with insecurities\u2014you're definitely not alone in that. And what\u2019s more, insecurity is something we can all chip away at over time. If you put your mind to it, eventually you\u2019ll see yourself as the vibrant, incredible person that you already are. How can you get started working through those untrue, insecure thoughts and feelings? We\u2019ve got your back. Check out our guides on building confidence to get started.","edit_links":[{"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Build-Self-Confidence"},{"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.life\/Fight-Insecurity"}],"link_data":[{"title":"How to Increase Your Self Confidence with Positive Daily Practices","id":22075,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Build-Self-Confidence","image":"\/images\/thumb\/a\/a2\/Build-Self-Confidence-Step-20-Version-4.jpg\/-crop-200-200-200px-Build-Self-Confidence-Step-20-Version-4.jpg","alt":"How to Increase Your Self Confidence with Positive Daily Practices"},{"title":"How to Fight Insecurity","id":2130913,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.life\/Fight-Insecurity","image":"\/images\/thumb\/2\/2a\/Fight-Insecurity-Step-15-Version-2.jpg\/-crop-200-200-200px-Fight-Insecurity-Step-15-Version-2.jpg","alt":"How to Fight Insecurity"}],"minimum":0},{"text":"You might be a little insecure.","meaning":"Based on your responses, you likely experience insecurity every now and then. Sometimes you may feel uncomfortable in your body or social situations, but it depends on the day. You might wake up feeling incredibly confident one day and very insecure the next. Being insecure can be annoying and disheartening, but rest assured: your feelings are totally normal. Even the most confident-seeming people you know struggle with insecurities sometimes\u2014it\u2019s part of being human! Plus, insecurity is something we can all chip away at over time. The more effort you put into battling insecurity, the more you\u2019ll see yourself as the vibrant, incredible person you already are. Check out our guides on improving self-confidence to get started.","edit_links":[{"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Improve-Your-Self-Confidence-Right-Now"},{"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.health\/Be-Less-Insecure"}],"link_data":[{"title":"Psychology-Backed Ways to Boost Your Self-Confidence Quickly","id":397410,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Improve-Your-Self-Confidence-Right-Now","image":"\/images\/thumb\/5\/51\/Improve-Your-Self-Confidence-Right-Now-Step-12-Version-2.jpg\/-crop-200-200-200px-Improve-Your-Self-Confidence-Right-Now-Step-12-Version-2.jpg","alt":"Psychology-Backed Ways to Boost Your Self-Confidence Quickly"},{"title":"How to Be Less Insecure","id":1423782,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.health\/Be-Less-Insecure","image":"\/images\/thumb\/1\/1b\/Be-Less-Insecure-Step-17.jpg\/-crop-200-200-200px-Be-Less-Insecure-Step-17.jpg","alt":"How to Be Less Insecure"}],"minimum":0},{"text":"You\u2019re likely not insecure.","meaning":"Based on your responses, you\u2019re a pretty confident person! You likely have a strong belief in abilities, skills, and accomplishments. You may struggle with feeling down every once and a while, but who doesn\u2019t? You know you\u2019ve got what it takes, and nothing will stop you from achieving your goals.Even though you\u2019re not insecure, it doesn\u2019t mean the people around you aren\u2019t. Use your confidence to help lift your loved ones up. Who knows? Your support and positive mindset could help them overcome their own insecurities.","edit_links":[{"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Help-an-Insecure-Friend"},{"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Deal-With-an-Insecure-Person"}],"link_data":[{"title":"How to Help an Insecure Friend","id":310167,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Help-an-Insecure-Friend","image":"\/images\/thumb\/5\/5b\/Build-Trust-in-a-Relationship-Step-8-Version-2.jpg\/-crop-200-200-200px-Build-Trust-in-a-Relationship-Step-8-Version-2.jpg","alt":"How to Help an Insecure Friend"},{"title":"16 Strategies for Handling Someone's Insecurity","id":1183730,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Deal-With-an-Insecure-Person","image":"\/images\/thumb\/f\/f4\/Deal-With-an-Insecure-Person-Step-16-Version-2.jpg\/-crop-200-200-200px-Deal-With-an-Insecure-Person-Step-16-Version-2.jpg","alt":"16 Strategies for Handling Someone's Insecurity"}],"minimum":0}]" class="quiz_results_data"/>\"Relationship<\/picture>","alt":"Relationship Anxiety Test"},{"title":"Couple Compatibility Test","id":13816755,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Relationships\/Couple-Compatibility-Test","image":"\"Couple<\/picture>","alt":"Couple Compatibility Test"},{"title":"Am I In Love Quiz","id":13203013,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Relationships\/Am-I-In-Love-Quiz","image":"\"Am<\/picture>","alt":"Am I In Love Quiz"}],"number":1},{"text":"Myself. I\u2019m not sure who I am.","result":"Luckily, we have a few more quizzes that might help:","next_quizzes":[{"title":"What Type of Person Am I Quiz","id":13974160,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/What-Type-of-Person-Am-I","image":"\"What<\/picture>","alt":"What Type of Person Am I Quiz"},{"title":"What Am I Good At Quiz","id":13996558,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/What-Am-I-Good-at","image":"\"What<\/picture>","alt":"What Am I Good At Quiz"},{"title":"Type A B C D Personality Test","id":13714623,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Type-A-B-C-D-Personality-Test","image":"\"Type<\/picture>","alt":"Type A B C D Personality Test"}],"number":2}]}" class="quiz_questionnaire_data"/>

What Is Insecurity?

In a nutshell, insecurity is an overwhelming sense of uncertainty about your worth, skills, or abilities. Insecurity can make you second-guess yourself and question your value as an individual. This doubt can cause feelings of anxiety, embarrassment, and depression.

Everyone experiences insecure feelings at least once in their life. You can feel insecure in a relationship, with your body image, at your job, in social settings, or with basic needs (such as food, housing, and health). So, what causes insecurity, and how can you overcome it?

Insecurity can be caused by:

  • A lack of emotional support from friends and/or family.
  • A lack of confidence.
  • A recent failure or rejection.
  • Social anxiety.
  • Perfectionism.

Signs of insecurity include:

  • Feelings of inadequacy.
  • Low self-esteem.
  • Feelings of uncertainty.
  • Anxiety about relationships.
  • Poor decision-making.
  • Poor communication.
  • A strong desire to be alone.
  • Being overly critical about yourself.

To overcome insecurity, try:

  • Acknowledging why and how you feel insecure. The first step to overcoming insecure feelings is to notice where they’re coming from. Pay attention to when you feel the most self-conscious, and ask yourself what might have triggered this feeling.
  • Practicing self-love. To build confidence, you must learn to love yourself. Speak positive affirmations over yourself, or write down 3 things you like about yourself every day.
  • Surrounding yourself with positive people. The people you hang out with can play a big part in how you view yourself. Make friends who lift you up rather than tear you down.
  • Aiming for progress, not perfection. Nobody is perfect, and that’s okay! Rather than always trying to be perfect, focus on moving forward. If you mess up, don’t fret! Take the mistake as a learning opportunity instead of putting yourself down.
  • Talking to a therapist. Believe it or not, chatting with a third party about how you’re feeling can make a huge difference. Plus, therapists can help you build confidence and provide personalized treatment.

Want to learn more?

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