Q&A for How to Cope when Your Spouse Is Away

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How do you deal with a traveling spouse?

Michelle Jacoby
Matchmaker & Dating Coach
Michelle Jacoby is a Matchmaker, Dating Coach, and the Founder and CEO of DC Matchmaking, a privately owned, boutique matchmaking company based in Washington, DC, Maryland, and Virginia. She is also the Co-Founder of The Matchmakers Alliance, an international industry organization for matchmakers. With over 12 years of experience, Michelle specializes in one-on-one matchmaking and group coaching to help singles find healthy, lasting relationships. She has been featured in several media publications such as The Washington Post, Self, and NPR. Michelle holds a BA in Psychology from George Washington University. She is also a Certified Matchmaker from The Matchmakers Institute as well as a Certified Body Language Expert from The Body Language Institute.

Michelle Jacoby

Matchmaker & Dating Coach

Expert Answer

Focus on spending some time with your group of friends! While there's nothing wrong with missing your spouse, your overall happiness should not depend on 1 person.

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Question

What do you do when your partner is far away?

Michelle Jacoby
Matchmaker & Dating Coach
Michelle Jacoby is a Matchmaker, Dating Coach, and the Founder and CEO of DC Matchmaking, a privately owned, boutique matchmaking company based in Washington, DC, Maryland, and Virginia. She is also the Co-Founder of The Matchmakers Alliance, an international industry organization for matchmakers. With over 12 years of experience, Michelle specializes in one-on-one matchmaking and group coaching to help singles find healthy, lasting relationships. She has been featured in several media publications such as The Washington Post, Self, and NPR. Michelle holds a BA in Psychology from George Washington University. She is also a Certified Matchmaker from The Matchmakers Institute as well as a Certified Body Language Expert from The Body Language Institute.

Michelle Jacoby

Matchmaker & Dating Coach

Expert Answer

Feel free to stay in touch digitally! Shoot them a text, call them up, or even schedule a video call. It's nice to stay connected even when there's a lot of physical distance between you both.

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Question

I feel so lonely with my partner away I can hardly eat. I find it hard to sleep at night, and I can't function properly. I miss him so much I can't function.

Community Answer

You need a hobby. Take up painting, read a book, start an exercise regiment, etc. If you cannot function without your partner, this is a sign of co-dependence. You need to have your own life. For now, when your partner is away, change up your habits. If you normally eat at the table with him, eat in front of the TV when he's gone. Sleep on his side of the bed or on the couch. This way you won't be quite as attuned to his absence.

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Question

How do I cope with the idea of my husband sharing a room with a friend and his significant other?

Community Answer

I can see how this could create an issue. However, a healthy relationship has a strong foundation of trust. You need to trust that your husband will behave appropriately; if you can't trust him, then the two of you have deeper issues to work on.

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Question

I feel so left out with my husband gone to Orlando on a 2 month work project. What can I do to feel better?

Community Answer

FaceTime him, talk on the phone, set up a time when you both can talk everyday, and maybe go on a trip to go see him.

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Question

How do I sleep at night with all these emotions?

Community Answer

Try distracting yourself. Read a book, listen to music, or watch a movie.

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Question

What can I do to cope with boredom and loneliness while my spouse is away getting his degree on another continent?

Community Answer

Now is the time to pursue your own interests and do thing that you want to do! Try picking up a new hobby, learning a new skill, reading more, going to concerts, or working out.

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Question

How can I make a call to my spouse who is deployed if his Army uses a PDA?

Tom De Backer

Top Answerer

Schedule a phone call through his PDA.

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Question

How can I maintain a long distance relationship?

Community Answer

See How to Make a Long Distance Relationship Work .

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Question

My husband left for work for 4 weeks. It's our first time being apart and I feel like my world is coming to an end. I feel like my thoughts are worse than what they should be. I need support!

Community Answer

Call him, it'll help make you feel better. If you can't reach him, send messages or an email that he can read later. It's hard to be apart the first time but you do get used to it as time goes on.

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