How Vanilla Am I?

Take this quiz to see how freaky you are!

If someone were to give your mind a movie rating, what would it be? Deep down, are you totally PG, or are you more of a late-night, R-rated movie? We’re here to find out.

Just answer these 10 spicy questions and we’ll tell you how vanilla you are. Of course, we won’t tell anyone. But depending on how vanilla you are (or aren’t), you might!

(Disclaimer: This quiz is just for fun! Rest assured: no matter your answers or results, your thoughts are totally natural and entirely normal.)

A woman in a white sweater shrugging in front of a red background.

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Questions Overview

1. Have you ever felt ashamed for thinking about something *spicy*?
  1. No, I don't really think about that stuff.
  2. Yeah, sometimes my thoughts can get distracting.
  3. Sometimes, but I'm not usually ashamed of my thoughts.
  4. Never. My thoughts and fantasies are nothing to be ashamed of!
2. Where do you most like (or want) to be kissed?
  1. On the forehead!
  2. On the cheek!
  3. On the lips!
  4. On the neck!
3. Do you like the idea of French kissing?
  1. Not really. It seems... sloppy.
  2. Sure, but there's a time and a place and a mood.
  3. Totally. It's more exciting than just a plain kiss.
  4. What's the point of kissing if you're not French kissing??
4. How do you feel about *spicy* scenes in movies, TV shows, or books?
  1. I'd rather not see them, to be honest.
  2. I don't mind them, as long as they're not over-the-top.
  3. I love them! We should all be more open about that kind of thing.
  4. I think every work of art should be spicy!
5. Would you ever have more than one romantic partner?
  1. Absolutely not. Just the one for me, please.
  2. Probably not, but I could maybe be convinced to try it.
  3. I'd definitely try it! It could be fun, with the right people.
  4. I'd jump at the chance to be with more than one person.
6. Would you ever make out with a stranger?
  1. Definitely not. That's dangerous!
  2. Maybe, but I'd rather they at least buy me dinner first.
  3. Sure, if they were hot and it felt right.
  4. Of course! It's always more fun with strangers!
7. What do you find the most attractive?
  1. Long, drawn-out eye contact.
  2. Little touches, like on the arm or the leg.
  3. Super cheesy and obvious flirting.
  4. Showing skin. Like a lot of skin.
8. Choose a vibe:
  1. A sunny field with laundry hanging on a line and a warm breeze blowing.
  2. A dim restaurant with a live jazz singer and delicious aromas wafting from the kitchen.
  3. Dark city streets on the back of a motorcycle, its engine warm and humming.
  4. A cramped bathroom at a concert, the walls covered in band stickers and the music thumping.
9. If you had to guess, would you say that your romantic and sexual interests are *spicier* than the average person?
  1. Definitely not. They’re way less spicy.
  2. I’m not sure. They’re probably average spicy.
  3. Are you kidding? My interests are super spicy.
  4. I’m as spicy as it gets. I’m ghost pepper level spicy.
10. Don't think; just pick a song:
  1. "I Knew You Were Trouble" - Taylor Swift
  2. "Single Ladies" - Beyoncé
  3. "Espresso" - Sabrina Carpenter
  4. "Take Me to Church" - Hozier

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And when it comes to trying new things, that sort of self-knowledge is important! When you know who you are, that leads to you having the most fun, fulfilling experiences possible. We love that for you!","edit_links":[{"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Overcome-a-Fear-of-Sex"},{"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Talk-About-Sex"}],"link_data":[{"title":"How to Overcome a Fear of Sex","id":214862,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Overcome-a-Fear-of-Sex","image":"\/images\/thumb\/4\/4e\/Overcome-a-Fear-of-Sex-Step-15.jpg\/-crop-200-200-200px-Overcome-a-Fear-of-Sex-Step-15.jpg","alt":"How to Overcome a Fear of Sex"},{"title":"How to Talk About Sex","id":391690,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Talk-About-Sex","image":"\/images\/thumb\/b\/b5\/Talk-About-Sex-Step-10.jpg\/-crop-200-200-200px-Talk-About-Sex-Step-10.jpg","alt":"How to Talk About Sex"}],"minimum":0},{"text":"You're mostly vanilla.","meaning":"You like to keep things regular and traditional, but aren\u2019t afraid to try new things every once in a while. You like to keep an open mind about most things, at least until you have some experience with them. Otherwise, though, your mind is a PG-rated movie. Maybe PG-13. You know what you're about, and we love that. All that to say, if you were ice cream, you\u2019d be a scoop of vanilla bean with a hearty helping of chocolate sauce. Maybe with some sprinkles or a few mini peanut butter cups thrown in.

When it comes to trying new things, that sort of self-knowledge is important! When you know who you are, that leads to you having the most fun, fulfilling experiences possible. We love that for you!","edit_links":[{"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Talk-About-Sex"},{"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Respectfully-Decline-Sex"}],"link_data":[{"title":"How to Talk About Sex","id":391690,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Talk-About-Sex","image":"\/images\/thumb\/b\/b5\/Talk-About-Sex-Step-10.jpg\/-crop-200-200-200px-Talk-About-Sex-Step-10.jpg","alt":"How to Talk About Sex"},{"title":"How to Respectfully Decline Sex","id":154689,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Respectfully-Decline-Sex","image":"\/images\/thumb\/3\/33\/Respectfully-Decline-Sex-Step-16-Version-2.jpg\/-crop-200-200-200px-Respectfully-Decline-Sex-Step-16-Version-2.jpg","alt":"How to Respectfully Decline Sex"}],"minimum":0},{"text":"You're not very vanilla.","meaning":"You like vanilla things, sure, but your taste doesn't stop there. When it comes to romance, you prefer an adventure, a new experience, something that gets your pulse pounding a little bit. Your mind is a PG-13 movie, or even R-rated. Definitely not something parents would bring their kids to. But you know what you like, and you like things that are off the beaten path, and we salute you. If your mind were an ice cream cone, it'd probably be vanilla-choco swirl. Yum!

When it comes to trying new things, that sort of self-knowledge is important! When you know who you are, that leads to you having the most fun, fulfilling experiences possible. We love that for you!","edit_links":[{"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Talk-About-Sex"},{"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Kiss"}],"link_data":[{"title":"How to Talk About Sex","id":391690,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Talk-About-Sex","image":"\/images\/thumb\/b\/b5\/Talk-About-Sex-Step-10.jpg\/-crop-200-200-200px-Talk-About-Sex-Step-10.jpg","alt":"How to Talk About Sex"},{"title":"How to Kiss","id":2053,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Kiss","image":"\/images\/thumb\/9\/92\/Kiss-Step-32-Version-4.jpg\/-crop-200-200-200px-Kiss-Step-32-Version-4.jpg","alt":"How to Kiss"}],"minimum":0},{"text":"You're not vanilla at all.","meaning":"Your tastes are totally not vanilla. Maybe you actively dislike vanilla things, or maybe they just bore you. Maybe you're looking for something more exciting, and to indulge your curiosity. There's nothing wrong with that! In fact, it takes an open mind and plenty of life experience to want what you want, and even more to get the things you want. The world needs more people like you, ready to venture off the beaten path.

When it comes to trying new things, that sort of self-knowledge is important! When you know who you are, that leads to you having the most fun, fulfilling experiences possible. We love that for you!","edit_links":[{"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Have-a-Healthy-Sex-Life-(Teens)"},{"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Face-Confusing-Thoughts"}],"link_data":[{"title":"How to Have a Healthy Sex Life (Teens)","id":400422,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Have-a-Healthy-Sex-Life-(Teens)","image":"\/images\/thumb\/a\/ad\/Have-Sex-Without-Your-Parents-Knowing-Step-14.jpg\/-crop-200-200-200px-Have-Sex-Without-Your-Parents-Knowing-Step-14.jpg","alt":"How to Have a Healthy Sex Life (Teens)"},{"title":"How to Face Confusing Thoughts","id":847341,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Face-Confusing-Thoughts","image":"\/images\/thumb\/c\/c8\/Face-Confusing-Thoughts-Step-18.jpg\/-crop-200-200-200px-Face-Confusing-Thoughts-Step-18.jpg","alt":"How to Face Confusing Thoughts"}],"minimum":0}]" class="quiz_results_data"/>\"Mental<\/picture>","alt":"What Is My Mental Age Quiz"},{"title":"How Big Is My Ego Quiz","id":13920175,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/How-Big-Is-Your-Ego","image":"\"How<\/picture>","alt":"How Big Is My Ego Quiz"},{"title":"What Human Emotion Am I Quiz","id":13428156,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/What-Human-Emotion-Am-I-Quiz","image":"\"What<\/picture>","alt":"What Human Emotion Am I Quiz"}],"number":1},{"text":"Tell me more about my relationships.","result":"Totally! Let's explore your relationships with these thoughtful quizzes:","next_quizzes":[{"title":"What's the Name of My Future Boyfriend Quiz","id":14423045,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Relationships\/Who-Is-My-Future-Boyfriend","image":"\"Who<\/picture>","alt":"What's the Name of My Future Boyfriend Quiz"},{"title":"Will I Ever Find Love Quiz","id":14125254,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Relationships\/Will-I-Ever-Find-Love","image":"\"Will<\/picture>","alt":"Will I Ever Find Love Quiz"},{"title":"Love Language Quiz","id":13401673,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Relationships\/Love-Language-Quiz","image":"\"Love<\/picture>","alt":"Love Language Quiz"}],"number":2}]}" class="quiz_questionnaire_data"/>

Time for “The Talk”

Sex! Some have it, some don’t, and that’s their business. Sex looks different for just about everyone, and indeed, there are as many kinds of attraction and desire as there are people in the world—probably more, if we’re being honest. If you haven’t noticed (which is sorta impossible), society has a lot of thoughts about sex, who’s having it, and what they’re doing behind closed doors. We’re here to break it down and spill a little truth tea.

Your thoughts don’t make you “dirty.”
Here’s a big hurdle that lots of people have trouble getting over. Your thoughts do not equal your actions. You’re not a dirty or bad person if you have dirty thoughts. In most cases, those are just your body’s desires playing out in your mind! For the most part, you can’t help them, and you don’t have to feel bad about them. That said, it becomes a concern when your thoughts stop you from living your normal life, or lead you to do things that hurt other people. If that sounds familiar, consider seeing a therapist or counselor to talk about those thoughts.

Sex is normal and natural.
It’s just another part of life! Our bodies have all sorts of cravings—hunger, thirst, socialization. For many people, sex is another craving. Other people don’t ever crave sex, and that’s normal and natural, too. What’s important is that we don’t try and make sex something that it’s not—evil, unnatural, twisted, or anything to be ashamed of. It’s just bodies being bodies, after all. Of course, that doesn’t mean all sex is totally good and normal, which brings us to…

Consent is a must. In order for sex to be good, fun, natural, and something to celebrate, there has to be consent. “Consent” means that everyone involved has made it clear that they want to be doing the hanky panky. Consent is explicit, meaning that the person has agreed out loud or with unmistakable actions that they want to be doing this. Consent is also continuous, meaning that at any time someone can change their mind. And most importantly, consent is necessary, meaning in order for sex to even happen, consent has to be there. Someone who’s under the influence can’t consent, and people who are too young can’t consent. Fully aware, willing, and uncoerced adults can consent, and that’s that.

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