How to Be Mature in Middle School

PDF download Download Article
PDF download Download Article

Middle school means more responsibility and more independence. This is a great opportunity to take positive steps toward becoming a mature person. Being proactive about your attitude and habits can help you make sure you’re headed in the right direction.

Part 1
Part 1 of 3:

Having the Right Attitude

PDF download Download Article
  1. Many middle schoolers become self-conscious and insecure about things that make them different. But as long as your behaviors aren't harming anyone, you should feel free to express your individuality.
    • Classmates may try to tease you about quirky clothing or unusual hobbies you like. Don’t let it get to you! If you learn to be confident in the things you like, it’s much harder to tease you about them.
  2. Be confident. This is one of the most important components of becoming a more mature person. Work on developing self-esteem — love and accept yourself for who you are.
    • Think confidently. Write down some of your talents and good attributes. [1] Reflect on what your friends like about you. Think of activities you enjoy doing and how you contribute. Take a moment to feel good about these qualities!
    • Write down the obstacles that stand in the way of your confidence. What are some bad thoughts you tend to have about yourself? Are they really logical? Are they a good reason to feel bad about yourself? It’s OK to want to work on certain things about yourself. You can still feel like a worthwhile, cool person at the same time.
    • Look the part. Dress neatly each day, but don't be afraid to embrace your own style. [2]
    Advertisement
  3. Recognize that while you can’t control what others may do, you are in control over your own actions and attitude. Understand things don’t simply happen to you. Your words and actions have consequences both for yourself and others.
    • Accept responsibility when things go wrong. If you failed an exam, don’t blame your teacher. Sure, maybe they could have done some things better. But what actions could you have taken to get a better result?
    • Try not to focus on things seem fair. Life isn’t always fair. Try to stay positive!
  4. If you are intentionally annoying or inconsiderate of others’ feelings, people will view you as immature. Remember the needs and wants of other people around you.
    • Are you prone to loud outbursts? Do you publicly embarrass other people? Try to recognize ways in which you may be unintentionally annoying others.
  5. Keep your emotions in check and try not to overreact to minor things. When you feel yourself getting upset, take a moment to think about your response before you do or say anything. [3]
    • Reflect on what tends to make you angry. Maybe it’s a certain classmate with annoying habits. Try to think of a way to handle the situation without getting angry.
  6. It’s common for teenagers to publicly tease and embarrass each other. [4] Remember that you’re in charge of your own reactions. It’s easier said than done, but try to maintain a sense of humor about yourself. Laughing at yourself allows others to laugh with you rather than at you. It also projects confidence. [5]
    • Even if you don’t find something funny, focus on not letting it upset you.
    • People forget embarrassing incidents much faster than you’d think. Don’t worry about something haunting you forever. It’s unlikely to shape how people think of you if you don’t let it bother you.
  7. Whether it’s schoolwork or a personal project, it can be hard to receive criticism on something you’ve worked hard on. But it’s an important step toward becoming a more productive, mature individual. Keep in mind that it’s not personal. Try not to get defensive or upset.
    • Imagine a friend tells you a poem you wrote is a little too intense. It’s supposed to be intense, you might think. It’s upsetting that she’s not appreciating something you worked hard on. But take a step back. Try to understand where she’s coming from. Ask for more details. [6]
    • Being mature is something that is internal, not external. If you're having an issue, don't be afraid to reach out for help. [7]
    8. Advertisement
Part 2
Part 2 of 3:

Developing Healthy Habits

PDF download Download Article
  1. Set goals and work toward them. Write down some of your current strengths and areas that you’d like to improve. Which of these are most important to you? Which are the most important for your future? Use these to construct clear goals for yourself. Once you have set goals, think of actions you can take to make them a reality. [8]
  2. Manage your time effectively. Developing good time management skills can help you reduce anxiety, make better decisions, and improve your performance. [9] If you’re overwhelmed with homework, try making a plan before you get to work. List your tasks in order of importance. Which ones make the most sense to tackle first?
    • Minimize distractions around you! Try being disciplined about putting your phone away and not checking social media. Creating good habits now will help you a lot in the long run.
    • It can be helpful to work for 50 minutes, followed by a 10 minute break. Try coming up with a routine that works for you.
    • Always be prepared for class. That will show your teachers and classmates that you are mature. [10]
  3. Develop good study habits. Many students don’t realize how much good habits can contribute to their success. Taking notes, making mind maps and researching independently are a few ways to make the most of the time you spend studying. Sometimes the answer is working smarter , rather than harder.
  4. Many teens have trouble with stressful, rushed mornings becoming a regular occurrence. You can help things go smoothly by planning ahead. Pick out your outfit, accessories and any make-up the night before. Pack your bag with all your essentials. Now when you wake up in the morning, you’ll know exactly what you have to do. [11]
  5. Choose your friends wisely. Your friends can impact how you feel and act, so it's important to choose them wisely. [12] Take care to surround yourself with people who bring out the best in you. Seek out people who offer emotional support and guidance. [13] Consider if your relationships have a good balance of give and take. Most important, develop friendships with people you truly trust and respect. [14]
    6. Advertisement
Part 3
Part 3 of 3:

Communicating Maturely

PDF download Download Article
  1. It’s important to be able to express your feelings and needs clearly, but without being cocky or arrogant. It’s also important to listen when others do the same. [15] Practice communicating maturely, and you’re likely to feel more mature. [16]
  2. It’s easy to feel intimidated in social situations when you’re surrounded by people you don’t know. Remember, you are an interesting and cool person with worthwhile opinions and thoughts. There’s no reason not to join in the conversation. If you overhear something interesting, feel free to jump in with a question. This allows you to enter the conversation without derailing it. [17]
  3. You will inevitably encounter some hostility in middle school. Middle school drama is usually rooted in poor communication, unhealthy habits, and insecurities. You'll save yourself much trouble by learning to deal with negative situations in more mature ways. [18]
    • It’s hard to pick a fight with someone who doesn’t want to fight. When someone gets upset with you, do your best not to get upset as well. Communicate with them instead, and try to come up with a resolution.
  4. If you find yourself in a negative situation, avoid the temptation to tell everyone you know how upset you are. Go straight to the source and attempt to talk to the person you’re having an issue with.
    • Even when you or the other person is truly upset, it doesn’t have to be a hostile conversation. Calmly and clearly express why you're upset, then hear the other person out. You'll be amazed at the results. See this as an opportunity to work on your conflict resolution skills.
  5. When someone texts or IMs something you disagree with, it can be tempting to argue with them. Some people are habitual text-fighters and may try to provoke you. Don’t engage! Whenever possible, explain you’d rather discuss speaking in person or over the phone.
  6. In small doses, gossiping can be OK. [19] But frequent gossipers tend to be less liked and less healthy. And even if you don’t do it maliciously, gossiping can do real damage. [20] If your friends are always going on about people they dislike, try subtly changing the subject. Eventually, your friends will understand you’re not into talking about people behind their back. In time, they'll respect you more for it.
    7. Advertisement

Expert Q&A

Search
Add New Question
  • Question
    How do I show my teachers that I'm mature?
    César de León, M.Ed.
    Educational Leadership Consultant
    César de León is an Educational Leadership Consultant and currently serves as an Assistant Principal for the Austin Independent School District in Austin, TX. César specializes in education program development, curriculum improvement, student mentorship, social justice, equity leadership, and family and community engagement. He is passionate about eradicating inequities in schools for all children, especially those who have been historically underserved and marginalized. César holds a Bachelor’s degree in Education and Biology from Texas State University and a Master’s degree in Educational Leadership from The University of Texas at Austin.
    César de León, M.Ed.
    Educational Leadership Consultant
    Expert Answer
    Start with the basics, like being neatly dressed and prepared for class each day. That will automatically show your teachers and peers that you're mature and you know what's going on.
    Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
    Thank you for your feedback.
    If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow
    Yes No
    Not Helpful 4 Helpful 17
  • Question
    How can I be mature in behavior?
    César de León, M.Ed.
    Educational Leadership Consultant
    César de León is an Educational Leadership Consultant and currently serves as an Assistant Principal for the Austin Independent School District in Austin, TX. César specializes in education program development, curriculum improvement, student mentorship, social justice, equity leadership, and family and community engagement. He is passionate about eradicating inequities in schools for all children, especially those who have been historically underserved and marginalized. César holds a Bachelor’s degree in Education and Biology from Texas State University and a Master’s degree in Educational Leadership from The University of Texas at Austin.
    César de León, M.Ed.
    Educational Leadership Consultant
    Expert Answer
    One way of showing mature behavior is in how you socialize with your friends. Keep your emotions in check—try to be well-tempered and not all over the place.
    Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
    Thank you for your feedback.
    If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow
    Yes No
    Not Helpful 1 Helpful 13
Ask a Question
200 characters left
Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered.
Submit
      Advertisement

      Tips

      Submit a Tip
      All tip submissions are carefully reviewed before being published
      Name
      Please provide your name and last initial
      Submit
      Thanks for submitting a tip for review!

      You Might Also Like

      Practical Ways to Be More Mature That You Can Try Today
      How to
      Be a Young Adult
      How to
      Survive Middle School
      How to
      Get a Girlfriend in Middle School
      How to
      Have Fun on a School Computer
      How to
      Survive Middle School (for Girls)
      How to
      Make Friends in Middle School
      How to
      Avoid Being Bullied in Middle School
      How to
      Have a Great Year in Eighth Grade
      How to
      Be Organized in Middle School
      Advertisement

      References

      1. ↑ https://www.mindtools.com/selfconf.html
      2. ↑ César de León, M.Ed.. Educational Leadership Consultant. Expert Interview. 11 November 2020.
      3. ↑ César de León, M.Ed.. Educational Leadership Consultant. Expert Interview. 11 November 2020.
      4. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/surviving-your-childs-adolescence/201310/why-so-sensitive-adolescence-and-embarrassment
      5. ↑ http://www.allprodad.com/teaching-teens-to-deal-with-embarrassing-moments/
      6. ↑ http://www.rookiemag.com/2015/11/life-skill-constructive-criticism/
      7. ↑ César de León, M.Ed.. Educational Leadership Consultant. Expert Interview. 11 November 2020.
      8. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/notes-self/201308/how-set-goals
      9. ↑ https://www.verywell.com/teaching-time-management-skills-to-teens-2608794
      1. ↑ César de León, M.Ed.. Educational Leadership Consultant. Expert Interview. 11 November 2020.
      2. ↑ http://www.rookiemag.com/2016/03/life-skill-how-to-wake-up-and-be-out-the-door-in-minutes/
      3. ↑ http://articles.latimes.com/2011/apr/11/health/la-he-the-md-teens-friends-20110411
      4. ↑ https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2009/mar/08/choosing-friends-friendship-breakdown
      5. ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships-communication/making-good-friends.htm
      6. ↑ http://socialwork.buffalo.edu/content/dam/socialwork/home/self-care-kit/exercises/assertiveness-and-nonassertiveness.pdf
      7. ↑ https://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/~/media/CCI/Consumer-Modules/Assert-Yourself/Assert-Yourself---01---What-is-Assertiveness.pdf
      8. ↑ http://www.rookiemag.com/2014/01/life-skills-301/
      9. ↑ http://www.rookiemag.com/2016/07/life-skill-how-to-reduce-drama/
      10. ↑ https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2014/11/have-you-heard-gossip-is-actually-good-and-useful/382430/
      11. ↑ http://www.apa.org/research/action/blues.aspx

      About This Article

      Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 154,569 times.

      Reader Success Stories

      • Janet S

        Apr 19, 2021

        "I am in 5th grade already. I do act mature but I sometimes laugh at the dumbest things ever... so this really ..." more
      More reader stories Hide reader stories
      Share your story

      Did this article help you?

      Advertisement