Q&A for How to Apologize to a Girl You Accidentally Insulted

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If you accidentally offend someone, how do you say sorry?

Patti Novak Williams
Professional Matchmaker & Dating Coach
Patti Novak Williams is a Professional Matchmaker in Las Vegas, Nevada. With over 20 years of experience, Patti specializes in working with clients one on one to help them find love. She has helped match hundreds of couples, engagements, and marriages. Patti was the star of the critically acclaimed A&E series “Confessions of a Matchmaker.” She has been featured in the New York Times, the New York Daily News, the New York Post, and The Wall Street Journal, and has appeared on The Oprah Winfrey Show, TODAY with Hoda and Kathy Lee, The Rachael Ray Show, CBS’ The Early Show, CNN, The Big Idea with Donny Deutsch, The Nate Berkus Show, and Fox’s The Morning Show With Mike & Juliet. Patti published a book in 2008 with Random House titled “Get Over Yourself!: How to Get Real, Get Serious, and Get Ready to Find True Love.”

Patti Novak Williams

Professional Matchmaker & Dating Coach

Expert Answer

It really depends on the individual situation, but if you feel like you've offended someone, the most natural way to ask for forgiveness is just to say "I'm sorry." Then, in the future, try to take a little time to think before you speak to avoid having that happen again.

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I said something really bad and offended my best friend. I said something about her parents, and she does not want to see me now. What should I do?

Community Answer

Send her a handwritten letter, and make it count. Tell her how sorry you are about what you said, that you were way out of line and had no right to speak that way. Tell her that you understand why she's upset, but that you really hope she'll decide to give your friendship another chance. Then just give her some space and let her think it over.

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Question

I called a girl flat in front of one of her friends and now they're all mad at me, how do I fix this?

Community Answer

Apologize. Tell her that you realize now that your comment was really rude and inappropriate and you'll never say anything like that again. Be patient, they'll get over it eventually.

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I just called my best friend a jerk and an idiot, and she said she will never forgive me. What do I do if I didn't mean any of it?

Community Answer

If you give a sincere apology, I'm sure she will forgive you in time. Just like you didn't mean it when you called her a jerk and an idiot, she probably didn't mean it when she said she would never forgive you. Just apologize, tell her you didn't mean it, and tell her you hope she'll decide she still wants to be friends.

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What do I do if my girlfriend found out I was cheating on her and she doesn't want to continue the relationship?

Community Answer

If you really cared about her, why did you cheat on her? Maybe you are sorry now, but you have to understand how bad your girlfriend must be feeling. If she's a person you really care about, you have to show her that you care. Tell her that you really screwed up, but you still care about her and don't want to lose her. And if she still doesn't want to continue the relationship, don't try to pressure her. Maybe someday she'll forgive you and want to be friends again, but you have to let her go. Learn from your mistakes!

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What do I do if a friend says I threatened them when I was just joking around?

Community Answer

Explain to him/her clearly what you meant, then admit it was just supposed to be a stupid joke. Make sure they know you didn't mean it in any way, and apologize. Accept the consequences, and don't make jokes like this in the future.

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What do I do if my friend told my crush that I like them and now they're avoiding me?

Community Answer

Make sure he knows it isn't true (if that's what you want,) and continue being friends. I know exactly how you feel, and I promise it will be okay. Just make sure you let your friend know they can't do that stuff anymore, and maybe stop telling that certain person things for a while until they regain your trust.

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What do I do if my girl is mad at me for telling her to be faithful? How do I stop her from being mad at me?

Community Answer

She's mad because she feels as if you don't trust her so do everything in your power to make her believe you trust her. Avoid telling her what to do because she doesn't belong to you and you're not the arbiter of her behavior. You are in a relationship. If she is with you it's because she truly cares about you so don't mess it up with your insecurities. Go and apologize to her, get her flowers, take her out on a date. Make her feel special and she will forgive you in no time.

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What do I do if I apologize to a girl I insulted and they act like a jerk?

Community Answer

If they’re really hurt by your insult, they may dismiss your apology or act like a jerk because they are too upset. However, most of the time a girl will understand your apology. If she continues to act snarky or like a jerk, despite your apologies and best attempts, she doesn’t deserve the apology.

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