How to Train Your Mind to Be Positive

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If you want to train your mind to be positive, all you need is some practice. Luckily, we’ve got you covered with some fun and simple routines. Check out this action plan made just for you—with these healthy habits, you’ll find it easy to stay positive all day.

This article is based on an interview with our life and relationship transition coach, Leah Morris, owner of Life Remade. Check out the full interview here.

1

Start off your day with a great attitude.

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    Jump right into some routines that will put you in a happy frame of mind. For you, that might look like sipping a soothing cup of green tea or listening to a funny DJ on the radio. Whatever brings you joy, make sure it’s the first thing you do and you’ll definitely have a lot to look forward to.
    • Just one smile can lower your stress hormones and convince your brain that you’re happy. [1]
    • A smile can also improve your heart health and attract people to you when you walk out the door. [2]
    • It’s okay if the morning routine that makes you smile is really unique—focus on what gets you up and moving!
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2

Stay hydrated and get plenty of exercise.

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    Drink at least 4-6 cups a day and exercise for 20 minutes or more. [3] When you get enough fluids, the circulation in your brain will improve, so you’ll have better long-term memory and balanced moods. [4] A regular fitness routine will also help because it will protect your brain tissue and enhance your ability to concentrate. When you combine both habits, you’ll make a huge investment in your mental health. [5]
    • If you get really active, you’ll need to hydrate a lot more, so carry a water bottle around.
    • If you find yourself regularly thirsty, you’re probably dehydrated—you’ll have a lot more energy if you increase how much water you drink.
    • To stick to your exercise plan, focus on what’s fun to you—for example, try dance work-outs if you prefer them.
3

Practice gratitude.

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    When you notice anything good that happens, you’ll realize that the world has so much to offer to you. Keep paying attention to small and significant details. [6] They can relate to the past, present, or future. A fond memory, appreciation for what’s happening right now, or hope for what’s about to unfold can warm your heart. To make gratitude a habit, try some of these tips: [7]
    • Send a “thank-you” letter, write a daily entry in a gratitude journal, or make a mental note when someone helps you out.
    • Try the “count your blessings” activity. Pick a random number, like 5, then use it as a goal—in this case, keep track of at least 5 good things that happen to you throughout the week.
    • Focus on one detail in the present moment that uplifts you. For example, you can say, “The wind chimes sound amazing in this breeze."
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4

Use positive affirmations.

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    Any motto you come up with reinforces how smart and creative you are. What you tell yourself affects your performance, so if you say, “I don’t know how to handle life,” you’ll forget that you have the power to fix any issue. Remind yourself that you have a lot of control over your circumstances. [8] Be kind to yourself, bring up your amazing values or what you love about yourself, and say something like:
    • "I am intelligent and resourceful. I will find a way to make today amazing.”
    • “I’m inspired by compassion. I’ll be kind to everyone I come across today.”
    • ”It’s important that I try my best, and that’s all that counts.” [9]
    • Reader Poll: We asked 595 wikiHow readers about which self-affirmation works best for them, and only 8% said, “My body is strong in every way” . [Take Poll] While this mantra can still make you feel good, try reciting other phrases like “I believe in myself” or “I am enough.”
5

Identify your negative triggers.

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    A negative emotional “trigger” is anything that brings up a stressful or painful memory. Once you compare what’s happening right now to the past, you’ll see there’s a big difference. First, tell yourself what emotion has come up. Then, connect it to an old experience. Finally, remind yourself that you can change how you behave in this present moment. Here’s an example of this three-step process: [10]
    • “I feel very frustrated right now because someone cut me in line.”
    • “This reminds me of when my parents dropped me off late at school and I got in trouble for being tardy.”
    • “I’m actually totally fine now because I don’t have work today. Waiting an extra 30 seconds is okay.”
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6

Use positive self-talk.

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    If you notice that you’ve slipped into self-criticism, flip the script and change your word choice so it’ll encourage you. First, say your name so your brain recognizes that you’re talking to yourself. Then, use a new phrase that doesn’t have a single negative detail. Finally, end with what you love about yourself. You’ll transform your self-image and see someone amazing in the mirror. [11] Try out a three-step self-talk activity similar to this: [12]
    • Start with your name. For example, say: “Jamie…”
    • Change your language. For instance, instead of telling yourself, “You’ll embarrass yourself at this party,” you can give yourself a pep talk like, “You’ll definitely meet a lot of new people tonight.”
    • End with self-love. You can finish with something like, “You’re a really good listener. I love that you care about what other people have to say.”


7

Try a few positivity exercises.

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    Any messages you repeat enter your “subconscious mind,” a part of your brain that shapes your beliefs. [13] Your “subconscious mind” has so much power that it affects how you feel all day. Here are some tips to make optimism a habit: [14]
    • Try Hendel’s “triangle” technique. Identify a feeling, like annoyance, and two emotions you actually need to fix, like anger and fear. Then, replace them with moods like joy and excitement. [15]
    • Use “tapping,” an “Emotional Freedom Technique” (EFT). Gently tap different points on your body and say something reassuring like, “Even though social situations give me anxiety, I love and accept myself.” [16]
    • Give yourself “ Neuro-Linguistic Therapy ” (NLP). Identify a reaction, choose a new response, and set a goal. For example, you can say, “I freeze up when I get criticism, but I actually love self-improvement, so I’ll picture my heart opening up every time I get feedback.” [17]
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8

Look for highlights in your day.

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    When you “scan” your environment, which happens when you look for what stands out, you train how your brain sees the world. Make sure that it zooms in on whatever makes you smile and you’ll start to see that life is full of fun and wonder. [18] You can jot down some notes like: [19]
    • “This coffee is perfectly sweet, the barista is very pleasant, and the corgi next to me is so cute.”
    • “Today, I saw an incredible mural, picked up some art supplies, and got an amazing discount.” [20]
    • “I saw a stranger carry an elderly woman’s groceries, read about a celebrity building homes for veterans, and witnessed a kid share a candy bar with their sibling."
9

Turn negative situations into lessons.

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    Stressful situations can wear you out if you think they set you back. Instead, take a deep breath, reflect on what just happened, and ask yourself how the experience will prepare you for your future. You might say something like: [21]
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10

Be a role model for your friends.

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    When you share healthy and productive habits, you’ll remind yourself what really works. Talk about what you’ve accomplished and help your friends create their own road maps to success. To uplift yourself and everyone around you, you can say something like: [25]
    • “I enrolled in a night class for professional development! What do you think will take you to the next level?” [26]
    • “I woke up at 7 A.M. to make sure I got a morning run in. It was hard at first, but totally worth it. What’s a routine that would help you out?”
    • “What’ve you all been up to?! I always feel so inspired when we catch up.”
11

Give people lots of shout-outs.

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    If you talk about how other people bring value to your life, you’ll practice another form of gratitude. Be specific with your praise and bring up why the person you admire matters to you. [27] You’ll realize how lucky you are to be surrounded by amazing individuals, and you’ll also strengthen your relationships. You can make someone feel special and say something like: [28]
    • “I’m so grateful for my sister! She’s incredibly wise and patient. I love our long phone calls and how much I learn from them.”
    • “I have the best roommates in the world! They helped me move all my stuff into my room and didn’t even ask for pizza in return!”
    • “I’m really glad I met my tutor, Alex. I feel like I have a handle on this subject now!”
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12

Help others out.

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    When you see that you can improve the quality of someone else’s life, you’ll feel instantly empowered. Volunteer or just focus on how you can be nice to other people—you’ll prove that you have the ability to uplift others every day. [29] Some sweet gestures might look like: [30]
    • Picking up litter. Even if no one sees you do it, they’ll enjoy how clutter-free everything is.
    • Donating pet food to an animal shelter. The staff will be grateful for the supplies. [31]
    • Smiling at a stranger. You’ll help them see that the world is a friendly place.
13

Joke around.

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    There are lots of reasons you feel great after you crack up—you take in a ton of oxygen, which works out your lungs, heart, and muscles. Those physical responses will release endorphins that will relax your whole body. Try out these activities to cheer yourself up: [32]
    • Pick a favorite stand-up comedian and subscribe to their podcast for a daily dose of humor.
    • Make a physical or digital scrapbook of silly memes, photos, quotes, and comics.
    • Share your own jokes or stories based on funny things that happened to you. [33]
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14

Listen to inspiring music.

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    Since music helps you reflect on different emotions, you can choose any genre you like. Whether you lose yourself to classical music or hip hop, your mind will try to figure out what the musicians want to express. Over time, all that focus will come into play when you find ways to solve problems. [34]
    • Write down your favorite lyrics and you can find some interesting answers to life’s challenges.
    • Journal about why some songs make you feel a certain way—you’ll learn how to express yourself, too.
    • Play music that relates to a project you’re working on. For example, if you want to write a motivating speech, you can listen to a song about bravery.
15

Meditate before bed.

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    If you make some time to be “present with,” or acknowledge, all your thoughts before you sleep, you won’t overthink throughout the night. [35] Sit somewhere comfortable, focus on your posture, breathe deeply, and concentrate on just one idea. When you end the evening on a positive note, you’ll relax, so say something like: [36]
    • “I look forward to beautiful dreams.”
    • ”I am safe and whole right now.”
    • ”I will wake up stronger and healthier.”
    EXPERT TIP

    Moshe Ratson, MFT, PCC

    Marriage & Family Therapist
    Moshe Ratson is the Executive Director of spiral2grow Marriage & Family Therapy, a coaching and therapy clinic in New York City. Moshe is an International Coach Federation accredited Professional Certified Coach (PCC). He received his MS in Marriage and Family Therapy from Iona College. Moshe is a clinical member of the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT), and a member of the International Coach Federation (ICF).
    Moshe Ratson, MFT, PCC
    Marriage & Family Therapist

    Meditation allows you to foster positivity. As you quiet your mind and appreciate the present, it's easier to reduce stress and encourage positive thinking. Take a little time each day to pay closer attention to your surroundings.

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Expert Q&A

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  • Question
    How long does it take to train your brain to think more positive?
    Kamal Ravikant
    Author, Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It
    Kamal Ravikant is a bestselling author, podcast host, speaker, and Venture Capitalist. His book Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It was a bestseller in the USA. He's had diverse experiences in his life, including meditating with monks in the Himalayas, serving as a US Army Infantry soldier, and cofounding several companies and a Venture Capital firm in Silicon Valley. He is passionate about sharing the common thread through all of these experiences: the importance of loving yourself.
    Kamal Ravikant
    Author, Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It
    Expert Answer
    It really depends. You have to learn to love yourself, and how long that takes can differ from person to person. Learning to accept your thoughts and process your feelings in a way that treats them as valid can be hard, especially if you aren't used to it.
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      Warnings

      • Beware of "toxic positivity". Always leaping towards "turning a frown upside down" can mean that you miss out on learning opportunities from painful experiences. [37]
        Thanks


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      References

      1. ↑ https://www.psychologicalscience.org/news/releases/smiling-facilitates-stress-recovery.html
      2. ↑ https://online.uwa.edu/news/benefits-of-smiling-and-laughter/
      3. ↑ Leah Morris. Life Coach. Expert Interview. 19 June 2020.
      4. ↑ https://www.cambridge.org/core/journals/british-journal-of-nutrition/article/effects-of-hydration-status-on-cognitive-performance-and-mood/1210B6BE585E03C71A299C52B51B22F7
      5. ↑ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3951958/
      6. ↑ Kamal Ravikant. Author, Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It. Expert Interview. 2 December 2019.
      7. ↑ https://www.health.harvard.edu/healthbeat/giving-thanks-can-make-you-happier
      8. ↑ Leah Morris. Life Coach. Expert Interview. 19 June 2020.
      9. ↑ https://www.cmu.edu/homepage/health/2013/summer/benefits-of-self-affirmation.shtml
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      2. ↑ Kamal Ravikant. Author, Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It. Expert Interview. 2 December 2019.
      3. ↑ https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2014/10/07/353292408/why-saying-is-believing-the-science-of-self-talk
      4. ↑ Michelle Shahbazyan, MS, MA. Life Coach, Author, and Speaker. Expert Interview. 18 March 2020.
      5. ↑ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2440575/
      6. ↑ Hilary Jacobs Hendel, LCSW. Certified AEDP Psychotherapist & Emotions Educator. Expert Interview. 8 September 2021.
      7. ↑ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6381429/
      8. ↑ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/26609647/
      9. ↑ Kamal Ravikant. Author, Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It. Expert Interview. 2 December 2019.
      10. ↑ https://ggia.berkeley.edu/practice/three-good-things
      11. ↑ Leah Morris. Life Coach. Expert Interview. 19 June 2020.
      12. ↑ https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S2352250X18300769
      13. ↑ Leah Morris. Life Coach. Expert Interview. 19 June 2020.
      14. ↑ Hilary Jacobs Hendel, LCSW. Certified AEDP Psychotherapist & Emotions Educator. Expert Interview. 8 September 2021.
      15. ↑ Michelle Shahbazyan, MS, MA. Life Coach, Author, and Speaker. Expert Interview. 18 March 2020.
      16. ↑ https://www.researchgate.net/publication/284515013_The_Motivational_Theory_of_Role_Modeling_How_Role_Models_Influence_Role_Aspirants'_Goals
      17. ↑ Leah Morris. Life Coach. Expert Interview. 19 June 2020.
      18. ↑ Kim Chronister, PsyD. Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 28 July 2021.
      19. ↑ https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/1948550616651681
      20. ↑ Kim Chronister, PsyD. Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 28 July 2021.
      21. ↑ https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/campaigns/kindness/kindness-matters-guide
      22. ↑ 30 June 2020. Sydney Axelrod. Certified Life Coach. Expert Interview.
      23. ↑ https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/stress-relief/art-20044456
      24. ↑ Leah Morris. Life Coach. Expert Interview. 19 June 2020.
      25. ↑ https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2010/12/101215113253.htm
      26. ↑ v161872_b01]. 28 July 2021.
      27. ↑ https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/mindfulness-meditation-helps-fight-insomnia-improves-sleep-201502187726
      28. ↑ https://theconversation.com/how-to-avoid-toxic-positivity-and-take-the-less-direct-route-to-happiness-170260

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