During the past few months, I developed a crush on the assistant hall director of the dorm building next to mine.
Let’s call him Zach. I’d see Zach a few times a day, and every time, we’d have what I call the “eye contact thing”—I’d run into him on campus so often that it was clear we recognized each other each time. There were times where I could have sworn he was interested, too. Sometimes, I’d pretend not to notice him and watch him go out of his way to cross my path.
One specific situation really made me think I might have a chance. I was sitting on a bench outside our buildings with a friend. I saw him approach his dorm, and, when he opened the door I could tell he got a quick glance of me. Less than a minute later, he comes out with his dog and walks her in the grass nearby, sneaking glances at me.
Another time, the *actual* hall director was walking into the building, saw me, went inside and then Zach comes out a few seconds later to walk his dog. I was so giddy over the fact that there was a chance that, maybe, the hall director let him know I was outside, because if that’s the case, he’s interested in me, too!
Well, at least I thought he was interested.
I was so confident, in fact, that I told a friend who lived in Zach’s dorm about my little crush in hopes to get more information on the guy before the semester ends and my chances are over. That friend, then, went up to Zach and asked if he knew me, because “she’s interested,” to which, he clearly said no, because we don’t know each other besides our “eye contact thing”. The friend then told him the color, make, and model of my car (which he has seen me get out of before) and told him that he’d know me when he sees me.
And he did.
The next time I saw him, rather than quickly looking away after seeing that I saw him, he stared at me and smiled—the “I know” smile. I looked away and looked back and he was still looking at me, smiling. I am embarrassed not only because he now knows that I find him attractive, but also because I deluded myself into believing he was interested in me. Every time I see him on campus now, I try to avoid him (he still smiles at me).
Thank God it’s the end of the semester.
