18 Ways to Tell Someone’s Attracted to You Based on Body Language

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The secret to reading people’s body language to find out their true feelings
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Aside from them just coming right out and saying it, how do you know if someone’s attracted to you? As it turns out, there are plenty of non-verbal cues people give when they’re interested in someone—you just need to know what signs to look for. We’ll help you by giving you a list of behavioral and physical signs to watch for. Next time you see your crush or someone you find attractive, you’ll know exactly how to read their body language to know if your feelings are reciprocated.

Things You Should Know

  • A person who’s attracted to you is likely to maintain eye contact, smile, and lean in towards you to show that they’re interested.
  • They might try to subconsciously draw attention to themselves by licking their lips, swaying their hips, or crossing and uncrossing their legs.
  • Someone who’s attracted to you might also act nervous and blush a lot when they’re around you.
1

Maintaining Eye Contact

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  1. One of the biggest signs that someone is attracted to you is their tendency to hold eye contact. It means that they’re paying attention as you talk to them and that they only have eyes for you They might also look you up and down if they find you attractive to take in your entire appearance.
    • To show your own interest, make an effort to maintain eye contact with them. However, make sure you’re not outright staring at them.
    • Hold eye contact for a couple of seconds, then look away and repeat. Have a pleasant and relaxed facial expression to help them feel at ease.
    • Keep in mind that eye contact in some cultures may be disrespectful and not necessarily interpreted as a sign of attraction or flirting.
    • Reader Poll: We asked 1779 wikiHow readers to tell us what the clearest indicator was that someone liked them, and 51% said prolonged eye contact. [Take Poll] Every person is different (and you shouldn’t assume unless they tell you), but this could be a strong sign of interest!
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2

Dilating Pupils

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  1. While there are other reasons people’s pupils dilate, research has shown that feeling physical attraction or arousal toward someone can cause this reaction as well. So next time you talk to someone you like, look to see if their pupils get bigger. [1]
    • The pupils of women who are ovulating often more readily dilate when they’re talking with people they find attractive. [2]
    • Other causes of pupil dilation include being in a room that has little light, feeling anxious, excited, or angry, or focusing with a lot of concentration on a task.
3

Body Orientation

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  1. This shows that they’re paying special attention to you. If they’re sitting, they might square their shoulders and turn their body so their torso is directly facing you. If they’re standing, they might stand so that their feet are pointed toward you.
    • On the other hand, if someone turns so that their body is facing away from you while you speak with them, it might be their way of indicating that they’re not interested at the moment.
    • Another way to show a person that you find them attractive is to actively listen to them as they speak.
    • Nod your head and give verbal cues that you’re following along, such as humming or saying something like, “Yeah” or “That makes sense.” Also get rid of any distractions, like your phone, and give them your undivided attention .
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4

Leaning Forward

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  1. As you and the other person become more comfortable around one another, you might notice them starting to lean a little more into your space. This might be their subconscious way of expressing their interest in what you’re saying or an attempt to get closer to you physically. If you’re standing, they might shift slightly so that they’re standing closer to you.
5

Smiling

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  1. A genuine, warm, and bright smile is something to look out for if you want to know if someone’s attracted to you. Smiling may be their unconscious way of trying to make you feel comfortable and relaxed. It’s also just a natural reaction that happens when a person is with someone they like.
    • Smile back at them to make yourself appear friendly and approachable.
    • Making someone you like laugh is also a good way to try and get closer to them. Tell a joke, recall a funny anecdote, or just act silly around them if you feel comfortable.
    EXPERT TIP

    Asa Don Brown, PhD, DNCCM, FAAETS

    Clinical Psychologist
    Dr. Asa Don Brown is a Clinical Psychologist with over 30 years of experience. He specializes in working with families, children, and couples; while treating a variety of psychological disorders, trauma, and abuse. Dr. Brown has specialized in negotiation and profiling. As a prolific author, Dr. Brown has published four books; contributed to multiple other books; published 500+ articles in professional and popular magazines, journals, and peer-reviewed publications; and has recently published a number of creative and literary works. Dr. Brown earned a BS in Theology and Religion with a minor in Marketing and an MS in Counseling with a specialization in Marriage and Family from The University of Great Falls. He has also received a Master of Liberal Arts from Harvard University. Furthermore, he received a PhD in Psychology with a specialization in Clinical Psychology from Capella University.
    Asa Don Brown, PhD, DNCCM, FAAETS
    Clinical Psychologist

    Body language speaks volumes about attraction. Watch for signs from them like dilated pupils, smiling, facing towards you, and small gestures like holding a door. Attraction stirs up complicated feelings, especially for younger folks. Awkwardness happens. But pay attention to body cues and changes in voice — these give away their inner thoughts and interest in you.

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6

Mirroring

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  1. When you cross your arms, they might do the same. When you take a sip from your drink, they’ll take a sip from theirs as well. People usually mirror the actions of people they feel attracted to, and they often do it without even realizing it.
    • If you want to flirt using your body language , mirror the other person’s actions in a subtle way. Tuck your hair behind your ear when they do, touch your face if they do, and mimic their posture and stance.
7

Initiating Physical Touch

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  1. A person who’s interested in you might take their flirting a bit further by throwing in some light, casual touches here and there. In an attempt to get closer to you, they might “accidentally” brush up against you while walking or gently touch your arm while talking to you.
    • To show your attraction to someone, don’t be shy about flirting using physical touch if they’re comfortable with it. Sit closer to them, hold their hand when you’re going somewhere, or even give them a hug if you’re both comfortable with that.
    • If you ever feel uncomfortable with someone’s touches, let them know right away and put some distance between the two of you.
    • Along the same lines, avoid touching anyone if you think it’ll make them uncomfortable. This kind of flirting is also something to avoid in professional settings, such as your workplace.
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8

Preening

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  1. Preening is an action someone does to make themselves more physically attractive to others. You might catch someone who’s attracted to you fixing their hair often when they’re around you, applying makeup, or checking their reflection. You may also notice that they always try to dress their best for you. [3]
    • For women, flipping their hair over their shoulders is one method of preening as a means to draw the other person’s attention to their physical features.
    • There’s nothing wrong with taking a little extra time to make sure you look good for your crush . Style your hair, wear clothes that make you feel good, or apply makeup to make yourself feel your best.
9

Maintaining an Open Posture

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  1. If someone is attracted to you and interested in getting closer to you, they might subconsciously adjust their posture to appear more open and friendly. They might stand or sit with their shoulders relaxed, keep their arms uncrossed, and use hand gestures when talking to appear more animated and enthusiastic.
    • In general, men often try to appear a bit more dominating and in control. This includes spreading their legs or arms out to take up more space and standing up straight with their chest forward.
    • On the other hand, women generally try to appear smaller when flirting, such as by tucking their legs close to their bodies when they sit and clasping their hands together on their laps.
    • Women might also position themselves so that their wrists or open palms are exposed. This is often interpreted as a subconscious move to appear more submissive in front of other people.
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10

Flushing

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  1. If you notice someone’s cheeks turning pink when they’re with you, it might be because they like you. This flush might appear on other parts of their body, such as their neck or their ears. It could also be a sign that they’re a bit nervous to be around you because of their feelings. [4]
11

Acting Nervous

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  1. It’s more than natural for a person to feel a bit jittery when they’re around their crush or someone they find attractive. If you notice someone’s constantly fidgeting with their clothes or other objects around them, having a hard time maintaining eye contact, or sweating a bit, they might be feeling a bit nervous. [5]
    • If you feel nervous around your crush, you might also notice that your heart rate picks up and your body feels a bit hotter than normal.
    • To be more comfortable around someone you find attractive , treat them like how you’d treat a friend and be yourself around them.
    • You might be able to tell if a person is nervous by the speed of their actions. Moving slowly and purposefully gives off a confident vibe, but moving quickly and in jerky motions may hint that someone is feeling nervous.
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12

Licking Lips

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  1. A person might subconsciously try to get you to notice their lips by licking them or parting them slightly. They might also do this on purpose to get you to start thinking about kissing them or notice how attractive they look. [6]
13

Raising Eyebrows

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  1. If someone from across the room is trying to signal to you and get you to come and talk to them, they might raise their eyebrows as a means of saying, “Come here.” A common flirting technique is for someone to raise their eyebrows and widen their eyes, then drop their eyelids and look away coyly. [7]
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14

Raising or Lowering Voice

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  1. Overall, women often find men who speak in a lower pitch to be more attractive. On the other hand, some men are more attracted to women who speak at a higher pitch. Of course, personal preference might affect what you find attractive. Just keep in mind that a person who’s interested in you might unconsciously change the pitch of their voice when they’re around you. [9]
    • They might also try to speak louder when they’re around you to make sure that they have your attention and appear more confident.
15

Tilting Head

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  1. If someone tilts their head slightly to the side, it’s usually a sign that they’re listening to you. In general, women are more likely than men to unconsciously tilt their heads to show their interest in someone.
    • A slow head nod is also a sign that the other person is deeply interested in you and what you’re saying.
    • On the other hand, nodding their head quickly might mean that they want to say something.
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16

Self-Massaging

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  1. This is usually a subconscious way of telling you to look at them and notice their physical attractiveness. For example, someone might rub their hand on their knee or thigh to get you to focus your attention on their legs. Other people might play with their hair or touch their lips. [10]
17

Swaying Hips

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  1. If you go to a bar, club, or another place where there’s music playing, look out for someone who’s casually swaying their hips to the beat and letting themselves relax in your presence. This might be a sign that they feel comfortable around you and are interested in getting closer to you. Women are also more likely to sway their hips while walking to draw the attention of people they find attractive. [11]
    • Touching someone’s hips is also usually a sign of attraction.
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18

Crossing and Uncrossing Legs

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  1. If a person is crossing and uncrossing their legs, it might be an unconscious way of drawing your attention there. It can also be a sign that they feel comfortable and relaxed around you. [12]
    • While crossing your legs might make you appear more at ease, crossing your arms can make you look closed off and uncomfortable.
    • If you want to look approachable , avoid folding your arms over your chest or stomach and maintain a relaxed posture.

Join the Discussion...

What are body language signs a woman is flirting?
WikiGibbonSlinger293
WikiGibbonSlinger293
As a guy I always find it hard to tell if a girl is flirting with me, and I feel like I'm missing out on possible connections because of it. What are the body language signs I should be looking for to figure out if a girl is flirting or not? Please help!
Cher Gopman
Dating Coach
When a girl is flirting with you, she’ll often smile, make strong eye contact, and act really present in the moment. She may do a little bit of hair touching every once in a while. If she’s leaning forward, that shows she’s interested. If she’s leaning backward, that could be a sign she’s not interested.

If she seems open, engaged, and comfortable, don’t be afraid to give a little touch here and there, like a quick touch to her arm when you’re talking and laughing. Of course, if she pulls away, that's a sign that she’s not comfortable with that, so be aware of how she responds.
Rebecca Tenzer, MAT, MA, LCSW, CCTP, CGCS, CCATP, CCFP
Clinical Therapist & Adjunct Professor
Flirting can be hard to decipher unless you know what to look for. A lot of women smile a lot, laugh, and will often use body language. It could be a tap on the shoulder, a pat on the back, a flip of the hair. Try flirting back and see if she’s responsive. Give her a compliment, smile her way. Test the waters and see where you sail.
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    I'm really confused. A friend I really like has displayed obvious signs of attraction, but when I asked them out, they said they'd rather be friends. What are your thoughts, and should I pursue it?
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    It could be they're scared to be in a relationship, whether it's because you intimidate them or it's their first. Try to make them more comfortable around you, and make little jokes every once in a while that hint at the fact that you like them. In time, they may be more willing to be in a relationship.
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    Why do guys stare at me, but when I ask them if they like me, they say no? Does this happen to everyone?
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    Either they're thinking something about the way you look (positive or negative), or they do actually like you but don't want to admit it. No, it doesn't happen to everyone.
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    I have a crush on a boy in school. He sometimes stares at me but doesn’t smile. How do I make him smile when he looks at me?
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    If you smile first and wave, he might smile back! If he doesn't smile first, it could be he's just shy. Smiling at him first will make him feel more comfortable and can cause him to smile back.
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      Thanks for reading our article! If you’d like to learn more about nonverbal cues, check out our in-depth interview with Cher Gopman .

      References

      1. ↑ https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/symptoms/22238-dilated-pupils
      2. ↑ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/17870074/
      3. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/articles/199304/the-biology-attraction
      4. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/why-bad-looks-good/202109/signs-someone-is-nervous-around-you-because-they-you
      5. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/why-bad-looks-good/202109/signs-someone-is-nervous-around-you-because-they-you
      6. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/articles/199304/the-biology-attraction
      7. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/articles/199304/the-biology-attraction
      8. ↑ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6614668/
      9. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/cutting-edge-leadership/202107/the-9-primary-signals-flirtation
      1. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/cutting-edge-leadership/202107/the-9-primary-signals-flirtation
      2. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/articles/199304/the-biology-attraction
      3. ↑ https://www.mensxp.com/relationships/impress-women/46132-6-most-obvious-body-language-signs-that-women-give-out-if-they-are-interested-in-someone.html

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