What's it like dating a younger man?
I am a 32F who has been hitting it off with a younger guy (24) at my gym and he finally asked me out and I'm thinking of saying yes, but I'm not sure. I like him, but I've never dated anyone so much younger than me, so I'd love to hear about other people's experiences dating younger men. What were your age ranges and how did it go? Did it turn into a long-term thing? Ideally, this wouldn't be just a fling for me, so I'm curious about the pros and cons of an age gap romance. Is this age gap too big? (He's not a baby, but he's still pretty young.) Would you recommend I say yes or just keep things friendly?
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Expert Comments
Dating a younger man can be a unique and exciting experience, but it does come with a few challenges. First, you’ll likely be at different stages in life, so you may have different priorities regarding your careers, finances, and having children. You might also have different lifestyles when it comes to things like partying or going out. Finally, different levels of emotional maturity could lead to friction or disagreements.
However, there are also upsides to dating a younger man. Each of you likely has a lot to teach the other, since you’ve probably had pretty different experiences in your lives. This opens you both up to fresh perspectives and new experiences, which can be very fulfilling in a relationship. Beyond this, a younger man could bring a new sense of playfulness, excitement, and enthusiasm to your life.
Ultimately, it's best if the two of you prioritize healthy, direct communication to avoid misunderstandings and learn to compromise so both your needs are met. With a bit of patience and work, you can likely have a fulfilling and exciting relationship!
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However, there are also upsides to dating a younger man. Each of you likely has a lot to teach the other, since you’ve probably had pretty different experiences in your lives. This opens you both up to fresh perspectives and new experiences, which can be very fulfilling in a relationship. Beyond this, a younger man could bring a new sense of playfulness, excitement, and enthusiasm to your life.
Ultimately, it's best if the two of you prioritize healthy, direct communication to avoid misunderstandings and learn to compromise so both your needs are met. With a bit of patience and work, you can likely have a fulfilling and exciting relationship!
A relationship with a younger man can work, 100%. Obviously, you're attracted to each other, and a lot of times polarity can create even more chemistry. But it's really just like any relationship, where you need to make sure there's an open line of communication and that everyone's needs are being met (especially if there is like, any kind of power imbalance in the relationship).
I've actually interviewed many women and asked, "Why do women like older men," and they'll often say, "because they're more mature," and I think it's the same way around for an older woman and younger men: the older woman really knows what she wants, she knows what she likes in the bedroom, she's more emotionally stable and not going out to nightclubs every night. She has more of a soulful connection to offer.
Beyond that, in an age gap relationship, the partners just have to find the common ground where they're just human beings, beyond age. They have to connect on the level of likes and dislikes, values, interests, passion, mutual attraction.
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I've actually interviewed many women and asked, "Why do women like older men," and they'll often say, "because they're more mature," and I think it's the same way around for an older woman and younger men: the older woman really knows what she wants, she knows what she likes in the bedroom, she's more emotionally stable and not going out to nightclubs every night. She has more of a soulful connection to offer.
Beyond that, in an age gap relationship, the partners just have to find the common ground where they're just human beings, beyond age. They have to connect on the level of likes and dislikes, values, interests, passion, mutual attraction.
Yes I agree, if the attraction is there, that is the start of any relationship, then once you find some common ground between you, the age gap really isn't an issue. It really comes down to how you relate to each other and having some common interests.
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Here's what I would say: I wouldn't be concerned about an age gap if the older person (in this case, you, the woman) has deemed that this guy is mature and established enough for her. What you shouldn't do, which would be unfair, would be to start dating him and then end up blaming him for being immature or not as established as you are ("I had to foot the bill", "He's not ready for marriage", "He's not ready for commitment"). If you're 32 and he's 24, you are likely to be further in your career or more ready for commitment. So in my mind it's most about making sure that you, as the older individual, are comfortable with where the younger is at in life (both in terms of how established you are and in what you both want romantically). If you align, then it's all good! However, if you determined that this person is not where you would require a man to be financially, emotionally, and all the other things, then it may not work for you.
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Reader Comments
I'm 37F and I have been dating a guy who's 26 for a year and a half. I think our relationship is wonderful! He brings a lot of energy and spontaneity to my life and he loves the perspective and maturity that I bring to his. Even though there's an age gap, we have a lot of common interests and relate to each other well. If you like him, I think you should give it a shot!
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I'm in my late 30s and am married to a man in his mid 20s. He makes me happy and I seem to make him happy too. Yes, other people judged us when we first started dating but I didn't let that get in the way of our love
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I would say yes, and especially as you both seem to get along pretty well. And see how it goes. If you back out, you might regret it and then you'll always wonder - "what if?" Nothing ventured, not gained. You have nothing to lose.
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Yes I agree, if the attraction is there, that is the start of any relationship, then once you find some common ground between you, the age gap really isn't an issue. It really comes down to how you relate to each other and having some common interests.
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Go get it girl! I much prefer dating younger guys. I’m 37 and have dated 25 YOs. I couldn’t care less what anyone else thinks. If are attracted to each other, have similar interests and values, and he has the attributes you look for in a man, go for it. I find younger guys are more open minded and fun. Yet to see anything long term with a younger guy but I know it happens. I also don’t like living with regret. Date him, get to know him. See what happens. All the best xx
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Go for it girl!!! I’m 74 yr, was married 4 23 years to older man. Loved it ALL! No regrets. Never thought of anyone else… then out of the blue this younger man, 48 yr old, never married, no children! No complications! I need that. All I can think of is touching his body. I don’t look my age, nor do I feel it, Even if it’s short lived I won’t regret the experience. He shows mutual interest. “Life is short.”
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I think that's a totally reasonable age gap on paper. What's most important is how does the age gap actually feel to you when you interact with him. If he's mature for his age, you may not even notice the age gap that much. If he's the right person for you, you'll feel it!
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I think you should say yes! There's nothing wrong with that age gap. It could work out and you could be SO happy with him, and even if it doesn't work out, being in this relationship will help you better understand if this kind of dynamic is something that works for you in your romantic life. That's my perspective on my "failed" relationships—in each one, I learn something about myself and what I need in love, and that brings me one step closer to my forever relationship :)
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