How to Innocently Flirt with a Guy over Text (Lowkey Ways to Flirt)

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When you’re texting a guy that you like, sending a few flirty messages is a great way to feel out his interest. But if you aren’t sure whether they like you back or not, how do you flirt with them without making it too obvious? We’ve compiled a list of flirty-yet-subtle messages you can send to your crush to make him fall for you over text.

This article is based on an interview with our professional dating coach, Collette Gee. Check out the full interview here.

1

Give him a compliment.

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    Everyone likes to hear nice things about themselves, and the guy you like is no exception! Send him a quick text telling him that you liked his outfit today or that his hair looked nice. Try something like: [1]
    • “Did you do something different with your hair? It looked really good today.”
    • “That blue shirt really brings out your eyes!”
    • “You have the best smile!”
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2

Ask him a question about himself.

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    If you know he’s in an extracurricular activity, you could ask him about that; or, if you know anything about his family, check in to see how they’re doing. The more you show that you care about him and want to know more about him, the more he’ll probably start to like you. [2] You might ask something like: [3]
    • “How’s basketball going this season?”
    • “Did you end up going out of town last weekend?”
3

Tease him (but just a little).

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    Don’t be afraid to throw a witty jab in there every now and again! [4] Don’t say anything too mean (since that could make him think you don’t like him), but try joking about something nerdy he does or a weird TV show that he likes. Throw an emoji into the message, just in case he thinks you’re being serious. You could say: [5]
    • “Wow, you’ve never seen Twilight? We can’t be friends anymore!”
    • “Doing your homework early, huh? Didn’t realize I was talking to a genius over here.😉”
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4

Start a flirtatious debate.

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    If you can both pick opposite sides, you’ll have a fun, flirty debate going over text. Not only will you get to show off your sense of humor, but you can lightly tease him about his opinion, too. [6] Try something like: [7]
    • “Pineapple on pizza: yes or no?”
    • “Is a hot dog a sandwich?”
    • “Would you rather fight 1 horse-sized duck or 10 duck-sized horses?”
5

Tell him you had a dream about him.

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    This will get him wondering what exactly he was doing running through your mind all night. To get him thinking even more, play it cool, and don’t tell him exactly what he did in your dream (even if it was something totally lame). You could say something like: [8]
    • “I had a dream about you last night, and I don’t think you want to know about it.”
    • “I can’t even get away from you while I sleep! I had a dream about you last night!”
    • “If you really twist my arm, I’ll tell you what you were doing in my dream last night.”
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6

Talk about his latest social media post.

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    Make sure you’ve liked it so he knows you’ve seen it, then shoot him a text about it. Not only will it show that you like talking to him, but it will tell him that you keep up to date on his life through social media. [9]
    • For instance, if he posts a pic of himself at the beach, you could text him, “I liked your pic on Insta! Which beach was that?”
    • If he Tweets about a movie he just watched, you could say, “What’d you think of that movie? I kinda wanna go see it, but the reviews are pretty blah.”
7

Show off your sense of humor.

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    When you two text, don’t be afraid to tell him a few jokes or describe something silly that happened to you earlier. Flirting and laughing go hand-in-hand, so the more you can make him laugh, the better! [10] Try something like: [11]
    • “What did the cat say to her boyfriend? You’re purr-fect for me!”
    • “The funniest thing happened to me today! I was walking and texting at the same time, and I ran right into a pole. 3 people saw me!!”
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8

Send him a meme.

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    If you find something silly online that you think he’ll like, send it to him with a message like, “This made me think of you!” He’ll probably be flattered that he was on your mind, and you might even have a fun conversation about the meme. [12]
    • Not sure what to send? No problem! Try searching “#meme” on Instagram or Twitter to find something that makes you chuckle.
9

Add a few flirty emojis.

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    You don’t have to use an emoji in every message, but a few well-placed ones throughout your convo will give him the hint that you like him. As you chat, try using emojis like: [13]
    • “Missed you in school today!😘”
    • “Hey, what’s up?😊”
    • “How’s it going? 💖”
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10

Invite him to hang out in a group.

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    If you two have been chatting for a while and you’d like to hang out in person, you can do it subtly by putting together a group hang. Invite some of your friends and a few of his friends to hang out, then ask him if he wants to join. Hopefully, he’ll say yes, and you can continue your flirtation in-person. [14]
    • Try something like, “I was thinking of going bowling with a few people tomorrow. Wanna join?”
    • Or, “I think my friends and I are going to a movie tomorrow. Wanna come with?”
11

Invite him to an event.

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    Inviting someone to an event like this shows him that you want him there, and it can be a great way to strengthen your bond. Send him a quick message telling that you’d love to see him there. Go for something like: [15]
    • “I have a soccer match tomorrow, I’d love to see you rooting for me on the sidelines.”
    • “Want to swing by my art showing this weekend? It would be so nice to see your face.”
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Improve Your Texting Game with this Expert Series

Not sure how to text a guy to get his attention and keep him interested? We’ve put together this series of expert articles to help you text easily and confidently.
1
Text a Guy on a Dating App
2
How Often Should a Guy Text You in the Beginning?
3
Text a Guy After the First Date
4
How to Drop Hints to a Guy You Like & Get Him to Ask You Out
5
Get Attention from a Guy over Text
6
Ask a Guy to Hook Up over Text

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      References

      1. ↑ Collette Gee. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 20 August 2021.
      2. ↑ John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 5 November 2019.
      3. ↑ Collette Gee. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 20 August 2021.
      4. ↑ John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 5 November 2019.
      5. ↑ Collette Gee. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 20 August 2021.
      6. ↑ John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 5 November 2019.
      7. ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships-communication/managing-conflicts-with-humor.htm
      8. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/love-digitally/201806/why-do-we-flirt-text
      9. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/surviving-your-childs-adolescence/201209/adolescence-and-the-teenage-crush
      1. ↑ John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 5 November 2019.
      2. ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/mental-health/laughter-is-the-best-medicine.htm
      3. ↑ https://www.scienceofpeople.com/how-to-ask-someone-out/
      4. ↑ Collette Gee. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 20 August 2021.
      5. ↑ https://www.scienceofpeople.com/how-to-ask-someone-out/
      6. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/why-bad-looks-good/201707/where-to-go-on-a-first-date-why-scene-selection-matters

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