What Does it Mean to "Keep Your Enemies Closer"?

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Learn the true meaning of this popular phrase and how to use it
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We all know the difference between a friend and a foe: the former is a trustworthy ally and the latter is a problematic aggressor. So, if you’ve ever heard the phrase, “Keep your friends close and your enemies closer,” you might be wondering: What does this mean? The popular expression encourages you to keep a watchful eye on your enemies, even more so than you do your truest pals. But why? Keep reading for a comprehensive breakdown of the idiom, including how to use it, where it came from, and whether it’s really in your best interest to do what it says.

What does “keep friends close and enemies closer” mean?

This phrase suggests that you keep tabs on your enemies in order to better understand them and defeat them. The exact origins are unknown, but some attribute it to Sun Tzu's The Art of War or Machiavelli's The Prince . In reality, the exact phrase was first used by Michael Corleone in The Godfather II.

Section 1 of 4:

“Keep Your Friends Close But Your Enemies Closer” Meaning

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  1. It means to keep a close eye on what your enemies are doing. The famous adage, “Keep your friends close but your enemies closer,” suggests that you should keep tabs on your enemies, monitoring everything they do and say, so that you can stay a few steps ahead of them. You may also gain some kind of advantage or understanding about who they are, what they want, and what they’re capable of. [1]
    • The phrase does not imply that you should befriend your enemies, but perhaps to remain friendly enough so that they allow you to remain in their circle.
    • The main point of the idiom is to stay abreast of your enemy’s moves so that they never manage to pull the rug out from under you, as enemies tend to do.
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Section 2 of 4:

How to Use “Keep Your Friends Close But Your Enemies Closer”

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  1. Use the phrase as advice when there's an enemy in your midst. You don’t have to be a military strategist to use this saying, especially if you’re giving someone advice. Maybe one of your friends is having issues with a coworker who is trying to sabotage them. Or perhaps your teenage daughter isn’t sure whether she should end a toxic friendship. Whatever the case, here are some examples of how you can use this popular phrase to give advice:
    • “Try to sync your lunch breaks so you can spend that time with them and figure out what they really want. You know what they say— keep your friends close and your enemies closer.”
    • “Consider what could happen if you cut all ties with her… it might be best to keep your friends close and your enemies closer.”
    • “Even if you don’t really like him and suspect he’s up to no good, stick around. Try to keep your friends close and your enemies even closer.”
Section 3 of 4:

Origins of “Keep Your Friends Close But Your Enemies Closer”

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  1. 1
    Some sources trace this phrase back to Sun Tzu’s The Art of War. Written by famed Chinese military strategist Sun Tzu in the 5th century, The Art of War details different aspects of tactical warfare. The idea of keeping your enemies close is echoed in one poignant passage in the book. The excerpt reads, “It is said that if you know your enemies and know yourself, you will not be imperiled in a hundred battles; if you do not know your enemies but do know yourself, you will win one and lose one; if you do not know your enemies nor yourself, you will be imperiled in every single battle.” [2]
    • The expression “keep your friends close and enemies closer” is thought to be misattributed to Sun Tzu, since no direct correlation exists.
  2. 2
    Other sources believe it dates back to 16th-century literature. Kabir was an Indian poet and mystic who lived in the late 1400s. In one of his most famous dohas, or couplets, he wrote: “You should always keep the person, who always criticizes you, near you/ For they have the ability to cleanse you, without the use of water and soap.” The sentiment here is a departure from the modern phrase we now use, as it focuses more on the positive aspects of criticism than the strategic benefits of knowing an enemy’s next move.
    • Nicolo Machiavelli’s The Prince was published in 1532 and is another frequently cited origin of the phrase. However, the direct quote is never found in Machiavelli’s writings. [3]
  3. 3
    The exact quote first appeared in The Godfather II . Although earlier versions of this adage have been in circulation for centuries, the exact expression as we use it today was first spoken into existence by Michael Corleone in The Godfather II, released in 1974. Played by Al Pacino, Corleone’s character says, “My father taught me many things here— he taught me in this room. He taught me: keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.” This scene in the iconic film franchise illustrated the importance of understanding your enemy’s motivations in order to ultimately defeat them. [4]
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Section 4 of 4:

Is this actually good advice?

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  1. It can be useful in certain situations, but take it with a grain of salt. In a strategic context, whether that be warfare or business, keeping your enemies close makes you aware of potential threats they may pose. “Enemies” can be used pretty loosely and can simply refer to someone who challenges your ideas or has different approaches to problem-solving. However, not every “enemy” is best kept close, especially if it allows them to impact your life negatively. So, if your “friend” from high school was always after your boyfriend and now you’ve married him… it may be best to keep that person far, far away.
    EXPERT TIP

    Sabrina Grover, LMSW

    Licensed Master Social Worker
    Sabrina Grover, LMSW is a Licensed Master Social Worker (LMSW) who earned her degree in Advanced Clinical Practice from New York University. Sabrina has experience working in substance abuse recovery centers and schools where she gained experience providing evidence-based treatment to children, adolescents, adults, and families. Sabrina specializes in Dialectical, Narrative, and Cognitive Behavioral Therapies. She has particular expertise in treating clients struggling with grief, complex trauma, interpersonal difficulty, family conflict, anxiety, and depression. She commits to providing a supportive environment for everyone who commits to growth and offering a warm, non-judgmental atmosphere.
    Sabrina Grover, LMSW
    Licensed Master Social Worker

    It really comes down to empathy for yourself and for that other person. For whatever reason, this person became your enemy. They have their own issues to work out. What you can focus on are your own strengths, your own positive attributes, your own way of navigating the world, and the more energy you put into yourself, the less energy will be put into that enemy.

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      References

      1. ↑ https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/enemy
      2. ↑ https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/17976-if-you-know-the-enemy-and-know-yourself-you-need
      3. ↑ https://shmaltzandmenudo.wordpress.com/2016/09/18/famous-sayings-28-keep-your-friends-close/
      4. ↑ https://therobinreport.com/keep-your-friends-close-and-your-enemies-closer/

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