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Fear of missing out (FOMO) is the anxiety caused by an nagging feeling that you are not taking part in the exciting and worthwhile things going on around you. The advent of social media has made this all the more difficult for many, as it is possible to see what almost anyone is doing at any given time. You can overcome FOMO by focusing on being mindful, altering your habits, and working to be more grateful for your own life.
Steps
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Evaluate your FOMO sources. Perhaps you are jealous of your friends for going on vacation when you don't have the money to do so, or maybe you feel envious when others get married because you don't have a partner. Work to make peace with these circumstances and to change them if you can.
- For instance, you will likely not be able to find a spouse quickly, but you can begin dating and find people whose values align with your own.
- Maybe you can't take an exotic vacation, but perhaps you can make a day trip to a nearby city or spend some time at your local lake or pool.
- Try to catch yourself when you make comparisons to others. FOMO is typically caused by feeling you don't measure up. It can help to use a portable counter and click it every time you catch yourself making a comparison. This can help you become aware of the behavior to put an end to it. [1] X Research source
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Deactivate your social media accounts. Social media is often what stokes FOMO more than anything else. If you are feeling very down in the dumps from seeing all of the fun that others are having, take a break from your accounts. Deactivate them for a while, and do so permanently if you feel that it helps. [2] X Research source
- You can also choose to unfollow or unfriend certain people.
- Social media has been found to cause feelings of depression because it shows a filtered version of life. This contributes to feelings of FOMO. [3] X Research source
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Choose your friends carefully. Avoid spending a lot of time with braggarts or those who are showy about their wealth or abilities. Instead, surround yourself with kind and compassionate people who will not rub things in your face.
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Declutter your life. In addition to ridding yourself of certain friends, apps, or sites, also work to declutter the space surrounding you. Overindulgence in materials might be causing you to feel that you are missing out on other material possessions. Clear out the things in your closet that you don't wear anymore and take some time to clean up your room, home, and/or office. Work to get back to the basics. [4] X Research source
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Learn to say no. Even though you might have FOMO, know that you don't always have to say yes to everything. Spend your time, energy and money investing in things that you care about and enjoy. Say no to anything that is wasteful, unproductive, or not fun to you. [5] X Research source
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Say yes to fun plans. Know that you can also agree to do things that are fun so that you don't actually have to miss out. If you have the funds and the time, do the things that others invite you to do and have a little fun. Take a few days off of work if you can spare it. [6] X Research source
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Embrace and understand opportunity cost. Know that with every choice you make, there is also a loss. If you choose to go to bed early, you might miss out on going out with friends. If you spend all night up binge watching a show, you might not be productive at work the next day. Make decisions that align with your priorities and allow you to keep up with your responsibilities. [7] X Research source
- It can help to remember that if you miss an opportunity, other opportunities will come. FOMO can make you feel guilty thinking about past opportunities you missed. You can't change the past, but you can be open to new opportunities.
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Make a list of what is truly important. One of the best ways to overcome FOMO is to begin to truly appreciate what you value in your life. Make a list of all the things that are important to you, including people, jobs, possessions or experiences. Spend some time reflecting on these things and expressing gratitude for them. [8] X Research source
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Invest in what you value. After you make this list, develop a plan to do a better job of taking care of and appreciating the things that are important. Become a better parent, spouse, employee and friend. Work to find value in the things you have (like your job), even if they are not what you would like them to be. [9] X Research source
- Reach out to your mom and tell her you love her.
- Arrive to work on time and complete all assignments before they are due.
- Give your car a good wash and wax.
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Create the fun that you're missing. Spend some time each day engaging in the activities that you feel you are missing out on in some way. Even if you can't travel, you can still revisit old pictures of you on vacation, or pictures of you and your spouse when you first met.
- Making time to take good care of yourself and address your needs will reduce your fearful feelings. Strive for a healthy work-life balance to make sure you're getting what you need to decompress.
- For example, you could join a yoga class after work if you enjoyed practicing yoga on a recent trip.
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Take your time. Focus on savoring the moment or experience in everything you do, whether it be eating, driving, or reading. Think completely and only about what you are doing in the here and now. [10] X Research source
- Turn off the music when you drive sometimes and just focus on the drive. Spend some time eating without being on your phone or watching television.
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Do one thing at a time. Though many people pride themselves on being good multitaskers, the reality is that the quality of what you are doing is often degraded when doing more than one thing at once. Try to focus only on one thing at a time and do that to the best of your ability. [11] X Research source
- Make a list of everything you need to do and number them based on what you would like to complete first, second, third and so forth. Do only that one task at a time.
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Meditate daily. When you wake up in the morning, spend some time breathing deeply and reflecting on how you're feeling, rather than simply springing up and getting ready immediately. Meditate in your car on the way to your destination or at night when you return home.
- You can start meditating by focusing on a certain word or phrase like “gratefulness” or “I have a good life.”
- There are free apps, such as Insight Timer, that can help you practice being mindful even if you don't have much experience yet.
- You can also meditate on a nice, quiet walk after dinner.
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Practice yoga . Yoga is a form of exercise that also incorporates meditation. Find some yoga classes or a yoga studio near you, or watch some videos online and do it at home. Yoga will help you become more mindful of yourself as opposed to always thinking outwardly about others and other experiences.
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Make time for yourself daily. Spend some time each day doing something small that is just for you. This will help ensure that you have something to look forward to for yourself. It doesn't have to be something large as long as you do something. [12] X Research source
- Perhaps you will treat yourself to ice cream or watch one of your favorite shows when you get home.
- Once per month, you might want to buy yourself something new.
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Expert Q&A
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QuestionHow can I deal with a fear of being alone?Dr. Tracy Carver is an award-winning Licensed Psychologist based in Austin, Texas. Dr. Carver specializes in counseling for issues related to self-esteem, anxiety, depression, and psychedelic integration. She holds a BS in Psychology from Virginia Commonwealth University, an MA in Educational Psychology, and a Ph.D. in Counseling Psychology from The University of Texas at Austin. Dr. Carver also completed an internship in Clinical Psychology through Harvard University Medical School. She was voted one of the Best Mental Health Professionals in Austin for four years in a row by Austin Fit Magazine. Dr. Carver has been featured in Austin Monthly, Austin Woman Magazine, Life in Travis Heights, and KVUE (the Austin affiliate for ABC News).I would recommend working with a mental health professional to uncover what being alone means and why it feels more comfortable to be with other people. I would also normalize and validate that human beings evolved to be social creatures. We are wired to be social and attuned to others, so this fear is by no means pathological or bizarre.
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References
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/communication-success/201409/how-stop-comparing-yourself-others-and-feel-happier
- ↑ https://www.adaa.org/blog/tips-get-over-fomo
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/evidence-based-living/201701/how-avoid-depression-induced-social-media
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/stronger-the-broken-places/201501/10-ways-overcome-fear-missing-out
- ↑ https://psychcentral.com/lib/learning-to-say-no
- ↑ https://hellogiggles.com/say-no-to-fomo/
- ↑ https://medium.com/@karimbelhadj/fear-of-missing-out-opportunity-cost-and-how-to-deal-with-them-821c735ba0a3
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/stronger-the-broken-places/201501/10-ways-overcome-fear-missing-out
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/stronger-the-broken-places/201501/10-ways-overcome-fear-missing-out
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