Q&A for How to Find out if Your Boyfriend Is Cheating on You (for Girls)

Your partner might not be where they say they're going to be. They might also change their physical appearance, lose some weight, and/or shave in places where they don't usually shave.

If you're feeling paranoid, investigate why you feel that way. Usually, our bodies know when things aren't right, but we tend to listen to our brain more than our gut instinct. Sometimes, the gut is very revealing!

If your boyfriend has saved explicit videos of himself with another girl, this doesn't necessarily mean he's physically cheating, but it sounds like he could still have an attachment to his ex. It might be worth it to have a conversation with him about what qualifies as "cheating" (since it sounds like this does for you, as it does for many people), or to just end the relationship.

If he has explicit videos of a girl he knows or previously dated, this is a strong sign he's cheating (or at best is hung up on his ex, if the video is old--which is still bad news). If it's footage of a girl he doesn't know in real life (or online), it might be worth it to have a conversation about pornography's role in your relationship. When it comes to pornography, everyone has different boundaries. If he's a good boyfriend, he'll hear your concerns and do his best to alleviate them.

If your boyfriend says another girl's name once or twice in his sleep, it might be nothing. But if he says it regularly, it could be a sign he's messing around. Ask him who the girl is, and observe his reaction: if he gets flustered, angry, or hesitant to talk about it, he might be hiding something.

Spying on a partner is a hard task for people of all ages, and it's probably for the best: following your boyfriend is a last resort and usually a sign the relationship needs to end regardless of whether he's actually cheating or not.

If your boyfriend is still friends with an ex, it's not automatically a red flag. If there's really nothing going on, he'll go above and beyond to make you feel comfortable: he'll introduce you both and make an effort to involve you in the friendship, he'll fill you in about when and where they hang out together, and he'll check in regularly to see how you're feeling about the whole thing. Over time, your discomfort is likely to fade as you learn to trust both of them.

If you're involved with someone with a...let's just say, ''unsavory relationship history'', it's natural to be concerned that he'll be unfaithful to you. People do change, and while your fears are valid, if you want to be with him, give him the benefit of the doubt until he starts acting suspicious.

If your boyfriend wants to keep your relationship secret, he may or may not be cheating on you, but take it as a red flag anyway: it's a pretty big sign he's not interested in a committed relationship. Run!

Nobody should cheat on their partner, regardless of gender. Both men and women can get emotionally attached to their affair partners, and both men and women get devastated when they're cheated on. But whether it's OK for someone in a relationship to have multiple partners depends on the boundaries defined by them and their partner(s): cheating doesn't necessarily refer to having multiple partners, but lying about having multiple partners.

If you don't suspect your boyfriend is cheating, keep on keeping on! No need to poke around for evidence. Even if you did suspect he was cheating, spying is really a last resort, as it can really damage the trust between you both if he's not cheating.

It's hard to confront your boyfriend about your suspicions, but part of being in a relationship is being able to talk to your partner about the tough stuff. If he's a good guy and not cheating, he'll do his best to reassure you he's faithful and show you whatever evidence you need that he's not cheating. If he is cheating, you can choose to give him another chance, but it's also perfectly understandable to end the relationship. As for what to do about the other girl...it might be tempting to try to find out who she is, get in contact, even yell at her, but ultimately, your boyfriend is the one you should be concerned with.