Q&A for How to Help Cats Become Friends

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How can I make my cats friends again after a fight?

Francine Miller
Certified Animal Behavior Counselor
Francine Miller is an Applied Animal Behavior Counselor and Founder of Call Ms Behaving, a behavior counseling service for dogs and cats in San Diego, California. With over 16 years of experience, Francine specializes in treating behavior problems such as aggression, separation anxiety, phobias, fear reactions, destructiveness, urine marking, and compulsive behaviors. She uses a behavioral management and modification plan that is positive reinforcement only. She holds a Diploma in Canine Behavior Counseling from the American College of Applied Science (ACAS). Francine has completed all coursework toward an MS in Applied Animal Behavior Science and Family Counseling for Companion Animals from the American College of Applied Science (ACAS). She is a certified Associate of the International Association of Animal Behavior Consultants (IAABC) and a member of the Pet Professional Guild.

Francine Miller

Certified Animal Behavior Counselor

Expert Answer

I recommend you separate them into their own rooms for a little while. Make sure they have everything they need like food, water, a litter box, and toys. After awhile, introduce each cat to an object from the other's room to get them used to the scent. Hopefully, this time apart will help them readjust.

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Question

Is it possible to bring two cats from different places into a new home?

Community Answer

Of course. Try the methods in this article, you should be fine.

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Question

What if I have two cats and I try to bring a kitten home?

Community Answer

Introduce the kitten slowly and make sure that you supervise them. Do not leave them unsupervised until you are confident that your cats will not harm your new kitten.

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Question

I have 4 cats. The young one chases all the other 3; two of the cats smack her and hiss (she backs off), and the other one runs from her & she gives chase. There's never any fighting, but what can I do?

Community Answer

They are probably just playing. If no claws are involved and there is no blood, you shouldn't have to worry.

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Question

My cat is stalking my other cat. Would Method 4 work?

Community Answer

Yes.

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How can I tell the difference between roughhousing and a fight?

Community Answer

When cats are legitimately fighting, you'll hear growling, hissing, and/or other loud vocalizations.

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We had two cats that were best friends. Ever since we added our new cat, they have been acting extra territorial to each other, and none of the cats are getting along, including the ones that were best friends. They hiss at each other, but they don't fight. What can I do?

Community Answer

Feed them in separate rooms, but close enough to where they know where the others are. Keep more than 1 litter box, preferably 1 per cat, and keep separate from food water, and each other. If there is ever a fight, make sure you have a timeout zone for all the cats. Create little areas where the cats can go where they feel safe, preferably away from each other and up high. Once a day, spend 15 - 20 minutes with each cat, training, petting, and playing with it. All of the cats will have attention from you, they will have their own stuff, and they will be exhausted with the play time they get with you, so they won't fight, and all will be peaceful.

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Question

I saved a kitten and my cat doesn't like him. What can I do?

Community Answer

Keep them separated, then gradually and slowly introduce them to each other.

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Question

What do I do if the cats fight and I'm not able to break the fight up?

Community Answer

Try spraying them with water, or rattling a can/jar full of pennies. If that doesn't work, you'll have to physically separate them, either by stepping between them, or grabbing one (gently) by the scruff of the neck.

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Question

I've tried all this and they still wont get along. What can I do?

Community Answer

If you really want them to get along, then you could try putting each cat on a leash and letting them observe and sniff each other. If one gets aggressive, just pull it away and keep trying. Be patient, though, as this could take days, weeks or even months.

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Question

I have 2 male cats. One of them was hospitalized and came back home after 8 days. Now "home" cat is attacking and hissing at the "guest" cat who was absent. Will neutering help to decrease tension?

Community Answer

Yes, neutering male cats will decrease their aggressiveness and help with the tension. As a plus, your cat/s will calm down, and there's a chance that they'll become more cuddly and nicer. As to this particular problem, time will be a factor too. When the cat was hospitalized and then returned, he probably brought all kinds of unfamiliar smells with him, and your "home" cat is confused and agitated about these smells. Eventually, the smell will fade and things should go back to normal.

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Question

My two female cats are 5 months and a year and a half old, and will not get along. Is this bad?

Community Answer

That is normal for cats. They just need more time to adjust, and they will eventually accept each other after a while.

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My cats reached a level where they can be in the same room, but still they are stressed and scream whenever one of them walks close. Will they be good to each other or not considering both are males?

Community Answer

All I can say is give them time and hope for the best. Maybe try giving them catnip and see what happens.

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My cats occasionally get along with each other. I see them playing with each other, even grooming each other, yet one still growls and is unhappy with the other in sight. Why, and what can I do?

Community Answer

They'll work it out. If there is no physical fighting happening, everything is okay and the cats are just getting used to each other. It can talk a long time and some cats are moody.

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Question

I have a Bombay fixed male cat and a Calico rescue un-fixed female kitten. They get along perfectly fine. One day my Bombay started licking my Calico's rear end. Does my Bombay want to mate?

Community Answer

No, if they are fixed they should be fine, this is a normal cat behavior of grooming. Unlike human beings, many other mammals find grooming each other all over the body by licking to be normal, and many pheromones and other signals are picked up from sniffing rear ends.

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Question

My 10/11 month old kitten is swatting my 1 month old kitten whenever he gets too close to my older kitten. And he doesn't like it when he is playing and swats my kitten. What do I do? They are not neutered.

Community Answer

First neuter the older one as soon as you can, to decrease aggressive tendencies. Get the younger one neutered at 3 months. Provide plenty of toys to distract their attention and detour the aggression onto the toys rather than on each other. Expect some attacking interaction though, as this is how kittens behave. Pull the younger kitten away if the fighting gets overly aggressive though. Things should come down once the older kitten is neutered, the younger one grows up a bit, and they get used to each other.

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Question

Have you ever experienced a cat that will just never get along with others and must always be kept isolated? I have a semi-feral newcomer that is very aggressive, but I have enough room to keep her apart.

Community Answer

The cat has not been socialized properly and will probably always remain this way. Cats need to be socialized early on to accept both people and other cats. Your ability to keep her separate is a wise approach, and you'll just need to accept that she's never going to be a friendly one.

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I brought a new female cat inside but she hides under bed. I am trying to let her to come out and I have another cat.

Community Answer

This is normal. Your new cat will come out over time, just try not to push it too much. It will get better once they get to know each other.

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