Q&A for How to Know if Your Friend Is Jealous of You

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  • Question
    My friend has become closer with our other friends and tries to put me down. What can I do?
    Tasha Rube, LMSW
    Licensed Master Social Worker
    Tasha Rube is a Licensed Social Worker based in Kansas City, Kansas. Tasha is affiliated with the Dwight D. Eisenhower VA Medical Center in Leavenworth, Kansas. She received her Masters of Social Work (MSW) from the University of Missouri in 2014.
    Licensed Master Social Worker
    Expert Answer
    Approach your friend in a respectful manner and tell her how you feel based on your perception. Try not to approach the conversation with pre-judgments or accusations. If she continues to put you down, she may not be the friend you need in your life. In a case such as this, I would then suggest go out and meet new people and develop healthier friendships.
  • Question
    My friend is always trying to make me jealous because she always goes on vacations. She always gets mad when I try talk to her and cries. What can I do?
    Tasha Rube, LMSW
    Licensed Master Social Worker
    Tasha Rube is a Licensed Social Worker based in Kansas City, Kansas. Tasha is affiliated with the Dwight D. Eisenhower VA Medical Center in Leavenworth, Kansas. She received her Masters of Social Work (MSW) from the University of Missouri in 2014.
    Licensed Master Social Worker
    Expert Answer
    Ask yourself if your friend is purposefully trying to make you jealous, or is she just excited about her achievements and wanting to share this information with you as friend. You may also want to ask yourself, why her vacations make you feel jealous. We all have the ability to create our own path in life by the choices that we make. If you feel that your life may be lacking in areas, and that you would like to see some of those positive achievements, start making changes and choices that will help guide you toward your desired goals.
  • Question
    My friend hurt me so much because I acted against her wish. Now I am avoiding her. Is this the right thing to do?
    Tasha Rube, LMSW
    Licensed Master Social Worker
    Tasha Rube is a Licensed Social Worker based in Kansas City, Kansas. Tasha is affiliated with the Dwight D. Eisenhower VA Medical Center in Leavenworth, Kansas. She received her Masters of Social Work (MSW) from the University of Missouri in 2014.
    Licensed Master Social Worker
    Expert Answer
    It sounds like that both of you may need to re-evaluate what it means to be a friend and what expectations each of you have for the relationship you share. Your friend had every right to feel hurt if you purposefully acted against her wish. However, she would be equally at fault if she in turn retaliated against you just to hurt you. Try incorporating positive responsiveness when interacting with any friend you have. Reflect on the situation prior to responding. Think about how your actions or words will impact you, her, or others prior to speaking or behaving. Does it add to the good of the relationship, or does it add more frustration, hurt or anger?
  • Question
    My best friend suddenly became friends with my friends she used to hate, now she is always having sleepovers and going to functions without me, then discretely rubbing it in my face. She also lies to me a lot. What can I do?
    Tasha Rube, LMSW
    Licensed Master Social Worker
    Tasha Rube is a Licensed Social Worker based in Kansas City, Kansas. Tasha is affiliated with the Dwight D. Eisenhower VA Medical Center in Leavenworth, Kansas. She received her Masters of Social Work (MSW) from the University of Missouri in 2014.
    Licensed Master Social Worker
    Expert Answer
    Do the best you can to have a sit down conversation with your friend about your concerns. If she is a true friend, she will take what you have to say to heart and work with you to resolve any concerns you may have. If she keeps making you feel left out, rubbing it your face, and then lying about it, she may not be the friend you initially thought she was. If this is the case, it may be in your best interest to move on and bring in new friends who are appreciative of you and what you can bring to the relationship.
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