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Deal with a mansplaining reply guy on Twitter or other platforms
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You may have heard someone referring to having a “reply guy” on Twitter or other social media platforms and wondered what they were talking about. A “reply guy” is a social media user who constantly makes annoying, rude, or inappropriate comments on someone else’s posts. In this article, we’ll explain everything you need to know about “reply guys,” including common behaviors, types of “reply guys,” and how to respond.
“Reply Guy” Definition
A “reply guy” is an annoying social media user—usually a man—who persistently and excessively comments on a woman’s posts. Their comments are often condescending, flirtatious, or rude.
Steps
Section 3 of 4:
9 Types of “Reply Guys”
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The Life Coach The Life Coach is a tough-love sort of guy who wants the poster to “toughen up, buttercup.” He’s here to help her in her time of trouble, but his comments sound like victim-blaming with comments like, “You need to dress like a programmer, so guys like him aren’t tempted to make a move,” or “If someone at work is bothering you, you need to stand up for yourself.” [7] X Research source
- The Life Coach falls under the Means Well category of “reply guys,” as defined by creators @shrewshrew and @sbarolo on Twitter.
- From Twitter: A woman in STEM posts that a trio of men have won the Nobel Prize in a STEM field again. A Life Coach reply guy comments, “Better to work hard instead of complaining! No diversity Nobel prizes!”
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The Tone Police The Tone Police “reply guy” is here to tell the original poster that she’s overreacting or getting too emotional. [8] X Research source They shift the conversation away from the issue to how it’s being discussed with comments like, “Your angry tone isn’t productive,” or “You’d be taken more seriously if you didn’t get so emotional.” [9] X Research source
- The Tone Police falls under the Focused on the “Real” Problems category of “reply guys,” as defined by creators @shrewshrew and @sbarolo on Twitter.
- From Twitter: A woman in STEM posts about women’s research being overlooked. A Tone Police reply guy commented , “Could the citation gap be a result of the fact that there are fewer women in top level lab head roles? I’d find it odd if people were selecting references based on sex. Also, some may see the use of “dude” as condescending and therefore there is a risk of reduction of reach.”
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The Gaslighter This “reply guy” is out to make their target feel confused and start to doubt themselves. [10] X Research source Gaslighting in a relationship is a form of emotional abuse where one person makes the other person question their own feelings, instincts, and sanity. [11] X Trustworthy Source National Domestic Violence Hotline Organization providing lifesaving tools, support, and resources for victims and survivors of domestic abuse Go to source In his comments, a Gaslighter tries to minimize sexism or pretend it doesn’t exist, saying things like, “Are you sure you’re not just overreacting? I’ve never seen him grab a female like that,” or “Catcalling isn’t a big deal. You should just take it as a compliment.”
- The Gaslighter falls under the Doesn’t Mean Well category of “reply guys,” as defined by creators @shrewshrew and @sbarolo on Twitter.
- From Twitter: In response to a New York Times post about a speech by climate change activist Greta Thunberg, a Gaslighter reply guy commented , “As a youth pastor, I take great joy in providing hope to my youth, pointing them to the only One who can bring true hope, Jesus Christ. Shame on those who would steal their innocence and fill their heads with such fearful nonsense for political posturing.”
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Cookie Manster The Cookie Manster wants credit for doing the bare minimum. He supports women, but not if it means actually doing something. His comments refocus any issue or situation, so it’s about him with comments like, “Not all men are bad guys! To my knowledge, I’ve never harassed a woman,” or “I treat women on my team exactly the same as the men.” [12] X Research source
- The Cookie Manster falls under the Means Well category of “reply guys,” as defined by creators @shrewshrew and @sbarolo on Twitter.
- From Twitter: In response to two women encouraging each other to stop apologizing at work, a Cookie Manster reply guy commented , “I still don’t get why she chose to love women in a thread that is addressed to everyone. There’s no mention of this thread being directed to women. Don’t get me wrong, she's allowed to love women all she wants. I love women too but I love work too & this is a professional thread.”
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Himpathy This “reply guy” is all about making sure men are taken care of, with their welfare at the center of every issue. They want to redirect any sympathy women may receive back toward men. Their comments often focus on reframing the conversation to the male perspective, such as, “How will men ever be able to approach a woman without being branded a harasser?” or “This is just a witch hunt. Men are getting fired if they look at a woman without any due process or investigation.” [13] X Research source
- The Himpathy falls under the Focused on the “Real” Problems category of “reply guys,” as defined by creators @shrewshrew and @sbarolo on Twitter.
- From Twitter: A female professor posts about an older man interrupting her lecture to tell her he couldn’t get the projector to work in his classroom. A Himpathy reply guy comments , “Was it their age, race or gender that meant you felt they were not entitled to ask for help. And which one annoyed you enough to make a comment to your class. If ever in doubt switch the positions & see if you would be happy with the same response if you had come to ask for help.”
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The Sealion The Sealion “reply guy” wants to shut down any discussion. They get their name from the Wondermark online comic by David Malkin. Their comments often demand evidence instead of engaging with the point, like “Can you provide specific statistics?” or “That’s an interesting point. Can you give me examples of research that shows this? I just want to learn.” [14] X Research source
- The Sealion falls under the Doesn’t Mean Well category of “reply guys,” as defined by creators @shrewshrew and @sbarolo on Twitter.
- From Twitter: A Sealion reply guy commented on a tweet from a female professor about the gender makeup of her classes with a series of questions including, “Context?” and “How’s the distribution at your institution, how is it for CS? How has it developed over the last years?”
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The Mansplainer This guy gets his name from the term “mansplaining,” which is when a man explains something to a woman because he assumes she knows nothing about it. [15] X Research source And that’s exactly what this “reply guy” loves to do in his comments, such as, “Well actually, that’s a misconception about what ‘mansplaining’ means,” or “That idea was proven wrong years ago by a guy, oh, I think his name was Joe something. Do your research.” [16] X Research source
- The Mansplainer falls under the Means Well category of “reply guys,” as defined by creators @shrewshrew and @sbarolo on Twitter.
- From Twitter: A Mansplainer reply guy comments on Roxane Gay’s post suggesting a hotel called The Clan sounds like the Ku Klux Klan with, “KKK is spelled with K’s. Clans are tribes dating to prehistoric times.”
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The Prestige The Prestige “reply guys” are the defenders of the status quo. They believe bad behavior toward women should be excused if the man is important or famous. His comments reveal that he believes men contribute to society while women are just complainers. [17] X Research source Such as, “Maybe he wasn’t great to his wife, but he was a creative genius, so maybe it was worth it,” or “We should give him the benefit of the doubt.”
- The Prestige falls under the Focused on the “Real” Problems category of “reply guys,” as defined by creators @shrewshrew and @sbarolo on Twitter.
- From Twitter: When writer Cheryl Strayed posted about watching a documentary about abuse allegations against director Woody Allen, a Prestige reply guy commented with a link to a YouTube video about his innocence.
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Trolls, Creeps, & Fools These guys are the worst offenders in the “reply guy” universe. They make comments that are overtly sexual, openly sexist, and often racist. They resort to insults when they’re confronted about their inappropriate comments by saying things like, “You’re too hot. That poor guy couldn’t help himself,” or “You’re too ugly to harass.” [18] X Research source
- Trolls, Creeps, and Fools fall under the Doesn’t Mean Well category of “reply guys,” as defined by creators @shrewshrew and @sbarolo on Twitter.
- From Twitter: A woman made a post suggesting a female character be added to a comic book. A Trolls, Creeps, & Fools reply guy commented , “Yeah it must be tough playing the victim 24/7.”
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References
- ↑ https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/reply-guy
- ↑ https://www.rawstory.com/2018/07/meet-reply-guys-obnoxious-twitter-trolls-try-challenge-prominent-women-fail-miserably/
- ↑ https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/reply-girls
- ↑ https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/reply-guy
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/compassionate-feminism/202404/hostile-and-benevolent-sexism-two-sides-of-the-same-coin
- ↑ https://www.nature.com/articles/s44159-022-00136-x
- ↑ https://x.com/sbarolo/status/1501219278275723268/photo/1
- ↑ https://x.com/sbarolo/status/1501221234025111556/photo/1
- ↑ https://blog.apaonline.org/2022/05/10/tone-policing-and-the-assertion-of-authority/
- ↑ https://x.com/sbarolo/status/1501226489395564545/photo/1
- ↑ https://www.thehotline.org/resources/what-is-gaslighting/
- ↑ https://x.com/sbarolo/status/1501240710716182543/photo/1
- ↑ https://x.com/sbarolo/status/1501260906591834120/photo/1
- ↑ https://x.com/sbarolo/status/1501268995508477961/photo/1
- ↑ https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/mansplain
- ↑ https://x.com/sbarolo/status/1501309743800799239/photo/1
- ↑ https://x.com/sbarolo/status/1501329420283482112/photo/1
- ↑ https://x.com/sbarolo/status/1501336313382916098/photo/1
- ↑ https://www.theverge.com/2018/7/12/17561768/dont-feed-the-trolls-online-harassment-abuse
- ↑ https://www.vox.com/recode/2020/8/11/21363584/twitter-harassment-limit-replies-feature-reply-guys
- ↑ https://help.x.com/en/using-x/x-mute
- ↑ https://techcrunch.com/2023/11/22/mastodon-tackles-the-problem-of-reply-guys-with-its-latest-feature/
- ↑ https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/cyberbullying.html
- ↑ https://www.actionagainststalking.org/tipsandadvice
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