PDF download Download Article
Deal with a mansplaining reply guy on Twitter or other platforms
PDF download Download Article

You may have heard someone referring to having a “reply guy” on Twitter or other social media platforms and wondered what they were talking about. A “reply guy” is a social media user who constantly makes annoying, rude, or inappropriate comments on someone else’s posts. In this article, we’ll explain everything you need to know about “reply guys,” including common behaviors, types of “reply guys,” and how to respond.

“Reply Guy” Definition

A “reply guy” is an annoying social media user—usually a man—who persistently and excessively comments on a woman’s posts. Their comments are often condescending, flirtatious, or rude.

Section 1 of 4:

What is a “Reply Guy”?

PDF download Download Article
  1. “Reply guy” is an internet slang term for someone whose comments are often condescending, annoying, occasionally inappropriate, and always unsolicited. “Reply guys” can be any gender, but the term is most strongly associated with men replying to women’s posts. In some cases, their responses are angry, and they believe the poster is obligated to respond. [1]
    • “Reply guys” often show up in the replies to tweets made by women with a large number of followers.
    • Journalist Amanda Marcotte was quoted in a Raw Story article as saying that “reply guys” would email female journalists before Twitter existed. [2]
    • “Reply guys” are sometimes seen responding to men’s social media posts.
    • There is such a thing as “reply girls,” but they don’t post direct responses. “Reply girls” are female YouTubers who post videos responding to popular or trending videos. Their thumbnails often have sexually suggestive images or text. [3]
  2. Originally, “reply guys” was a mildly derogatory term for people who constantly replied to celebrities who were active on social media, specifically Donald Trump. As the slang term became more popular, its meaning shifted to refer to men who make sexist or annoying comments on women’s posts. [4]
  3. Advertisement
Section 2 of 4:

What do “reply guys” do?

PDF download Download Article
  1. “Reply guys” always comment even when their input is unnecessary or unrelated to the topic. They may make multiple responses to the original post and other comments. They do this to prolong the conversation and gain recognition. They may even tag the original poster on every one of their comments because they want more attention, validation, and engagement with her.
    • They may continue to respond with advice, explanations, and contrarian comments even after it’s clear that they have nothing interesting to offer.
  2. In some cases, the comments are overtly sexual, but they can be any compliment that has nothing to do with the original post. Some compliments are overly flowery, such as, “That color brings a rosy bloom to your cheeks, m’lady.”
    • A man replied to a tweet from Kamala Harris about conditions in a Brooklyn criminal detention center with, “I almost hate to bring this up - Kamala - I truly believe in and entirely endorse you and, oddly enough, kinda have a crush on you. (I just couldn’t help myself; watching you perform a metaphoric ‘castration’ on that useless sot, Kavanaughty, prompted a very visceral reaction…”
    • When Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez tweeted about flipping red districts to blue, a man replied with, “Ms Ocasio you may be very sexy but you are a Dudebro and so I can never vote for you!”
  3. Many of the replies to women’s social media posts contain “benevolent” sexism. This type of sexism is less aggressive and often flies under the radar because it has a veneer of kindness. The “reply guy” acts as a protector and, most of all, a teacher who is there to show the female poster how the world really works. He may genuinely feel the need to care for women because he believes they are weaker and in need of protection. [5]
    • Most “reply guys” fall under this label, but some can show a more hostile form of sexism with abusive or threatening comments.
    • While benevolent sexism may seem less harmful because it seems to idealize and flatter women who fit into traditional gender roles. Benevolent sexism can seem more acceptable because it makes the benevolent sexist seem more caring, even when he has views that align with more hostile sexism, but it’s just as dangerous as overt misogyny. [6]
  4. Advertisement
Section 3 of 4:

9 Types of “Reply Guys”

PDF download Download Article
  1. The Life Coach is a tough-love sort of guy who wants the poster to “toughen up, buttercup.” He’s here to help her in her time of trouble, but his comments sound like victim-blaming with comments like, “You need to dress like a programmer, so guys like him aren’t tempted to make a move,” or “If someone at work is bothering you, you need to stand up for yourself.” [7]
    • The Life Coach falls under the Means Well category of “reply guys,” as defined by creators @shrewshrew and @sbarolo on Twitter.
    • From Twitter: A woman in STEM posts that a trio of men have won the Nobel Prize in a STEM field again. A Life Coach reply guy comments, “Better to work hard instead of complaining! No diversity Nobel prizes!”
  2. The Tone Police “reply guy” is here to tell the original poster that she’s overreacting or getting too emotional. [8] They shift the conversation away from the issue to how it’s being discussed with comments like, “Your angry tone isn’t productive,” or “You’d be taken more seriously if you didn’t get so emotional.” [9]
    • The Tone Police falls under the Focused on the “Real” Problems category of “reply guys,” as defined by creators @shrewshrew and @sbarolo on Twitter.
    • From Twitter: A woman in STEM posts about women’s research being overlooked. A Tone Police reply guy commented , “Could the citation gap be a result of the fact that there are fewer women in top level lab head roles? I’d find it odd if people were selecting references based on sex. Also, some may see the use of “dude” as condescending and therefore there is a risk of reduction of reach.”
  3. This “reply guy” is out to make their target feel confused and start to doubt themselves. [10] Gaslighting in a relationship is a form of emotional abuse where one person makes the other person question their own feelings, instincts, and sanity. [11] In his comments, a Gaslighter tries to minimize sexism or pretend it doesn’t exist, saying things like, “Are you sure you’re not just overreacting? I’ve never seen him grab a female like that,” or “Catcalling isn’t a big deal. You should just take it as a compliment.”
    • The Gaslighter falls under the Doesn’t Mean Well category of “reply guys,” as defined by creators @shrewshrew and @sbarolo on Twitter.
    • From Twitter: In response to a New York Times post about a speech by climate change activist Greta Thunberg, a Gaslighter reply guy commented , “As a youth pastor, I take great joy in providing hope to my youth, pointing them to the only One who can bring true hope, Jesus Christ. Shame on those who would steal their innocence and fill their heads with such fearful nonsense for political posturing.”
  4. The Cookie Manster wants credit for doing the bare minimum. He supports women, but not if it means actually doing something. His comments refocus any issue or situation, so it’s about him with comments like, “Not all men are bad guys! To my knowledge, I’ve never harassed a woman,” or “I treat women on my team exactly the same as the men.” [12]
    • The Cookie Manster falls under the Means Well category of “reply guys,” as defined by creators @shrewshrew and @sbarolo on Twitter.
    • From Twitter: In response to two women encouraging each other to stop apologizing at work, a Cookie Manster reply guy commented , “I still don’t get why she chose to love women in a thread that is addressed to everyone. There’s no mention of this thread being directed to women. Don’t get me wrong, she's allowed to love women all she wants. I love women too but I love work too & this is a professional thread.”
  5. This “reply guy” is all about making sure men are taken care of, with their welfare at the center of every issue. They want to redirect any sympathy women may receive back toward men. Their comments often focus on reframing the conversation to the male perspective, such as, “How will men ever be able to approach a woman without being branded a harasser?” or “This is just a witch hunt. Men are getting fired if they look at a woman without any due process or investigation.” [13]
    • The Himpathy falls under the Focused on the “Real” Problems category of “reply guys,” as defined by creators @shrewshrew and @sbarolo on Twitter.
    • From Twitter: A female professor posts about an older man interrupting her lecture to tell her he couldn’t get the projector to work in his classroom. A Himpathy reply guy comments , “Was it their age, race or gender that meant you felt they were not entitled to ask for help. And which one annoyed you enough to make a comment to your class. If ever in doubt switch the positions & see if you would be happy with the same response if you had come to ask for help.”
  6. The Sealion “reply guy” wants to shut down any discussion. They get their name from the Wondermark online comic by David Malkin. Their comments often demand evidence instead of engaging with the point, like “Can you provide specific statistics?” or “That’s an interesting point. Can you give me examples of research that shows this? I just want to learn.” [14]
    • The Sealion falls under the Doesn’t Mean Well category of “reply guys,” as defined by creators @shrewshrew and @sbarolo on Twitter.
    • From Twitter: A Sealion reply guy commented on a tweet from a female professor about the gender makeup of her classes with a series of questions including, “Context?” and “How’s the distribution at your institution, how is it for CS? How has it developed over the last years?”
  7. This guy gets his name from the term “mansplaining,” which is when a man explains something to a woman because he assumes she knows nothing about it. [15] And that’s exactly what this “reply guy” loves to do in his comments, such as, “Well actually, that’s a misconception about what ‘mansplaining’ means,” or “That idea was proven wrong years ago by a guy, oh, I think his name was Joe something. Do your research.” [16]
    • The Mansplainer falls under the Means Well category of “reply guys,” as defined by creators @shrewshrew and @sbarolo on Twitter.
    • From Twitter: A Mansplainer reply guy comments on Roxane Gay’s post suggesting a hotel called The Clan sounds like the Ku Klux Klan with, “KKK is spelled with K’s. Clans are tribes dating to prehistoric times.”
  8. The Prestige “reply guys” are the defenders of the status quo. They believe bad behavior toward women should be excused if the man is important or famous. His comments reveal that he believes men contribute to society while women are just complainers. [17] Such as, “Maybe he wasn’t great to his wife, but he was a creative genius, so maybe it was worth it,” or “We should give him the benefit of the doubt.”
    • The Prestige falls under the Focused on the “Real” Problems category of “reply guys,” as defined by creators @shrewshrew and @sbarolo on Twitter.
    • From Twitter: When writer Cheryl Strayed posted about watching a documentary about abuse allegations against director Woody Allen, a Prestige reply guy commented with a link to a YouTube video about his innocence.
  9. These guys are the worst offenders in the “reply guy” universe. They make comments that are overtly sexual, openly sexist, and often racist. They resort to insults when they’re confronted about their inappropriate comments by saying things like, “You’re too hot. That poor guy couldn’t help himself,” or “You’re too ugly to harass.” [18]
    • Trolls, Creeps, and Fools fall under the Doesn’t Mean Well category of “reply guys,” as defined by creators @shrewshrew and @sbarolo on Twitter.
    • From Twitter: A woman made a post suggesting a female character be added to a comic book. A Trolls, Creeps, & Fools reply guy commented , “Yeah it must be tough playing the victim 24/7.”
  10. Advertisement
Section 4 of 4:

How to Respond to a “Reply Guy”

PDF download Download Article
  1. One of the easiest ways to deal with a “reply guy” is to ignore them. In spite of what a “reply guy” may think, you don’t owe them a response. Unfortunately, ignoring “reply guys” makes some of them even more persistent and won’t prevent you from seeing his responses. [19]
    • Sometimes, “reply guys” may escalate their behavior if ignored. If this happens, simply ignoring them might not be enough.
  2. In 2020, Twitter (now X) rolled out a feature allowing you more control over who you interact with on the platform. When you post, you can limit who can reply. The “reply guy” will still be able to see, share, and like your tweet, though. [20] Or you can block them completely.
    • To mute or block an account on Twitter (X), go to the profile page of the user you want to mute, click the three dots next to the envelop icon, and select Mute or Block from the list of options. [21]
    • In 2023, the decentralized social media network Mastodon added “nudges” that reminded users commenting on a stranger’s post to be respectful, kind, and open to fight “reply guy” comments. [22]
  3. Landing the perfect creative insult can feel great and help point out the “reply guy’s” bad behavior to the rest of your followers. Less annoying followers will often pile on the “reply guy,” which may discourage him from commenting in the future.
    • Some “reply guys” may see any response from you as encouragement, so this approach can backfire.
  4. Be aware of the signs of cyberstalking and cyberbullying, like hateful or threatening comments, responses meant to humiliate you, and unwanted, persistent messages. [23] There are measures you can take to avoid being stalked on social media , but if you feel scared or anxious contact your local police or find contact information for a group or organization that deals with cyberstalking through the National Center for Victims of Crime .
    • Dealing with an online stalker can be confusing and frightening because it’s a crime that can be difficult to prosecute.
    • If you suspect you have an online stalker, don’t reply to them and keep a log to track their comments. Take screenshots, note the times they contacted you, and tell your friends and family about your stalker. That way, you have a record of their harassment to use when reporting them to the police. [24]
  5. Advertisement

Expert Q&A

Ask a Question
      Advertisement

      Tips

      Submit a Tip
      All tip submissions are carefully reviewed before being published
      Name
      Please provide your name and last initial
      Thanks for submitting a tip for review!

      About This Article

      Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 926 times.

      Is this article up to date?

      Advertisement