What Is a Fraternity Sweetheart? (& How Do You Become One?)

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The traits, expectations, & opinions that swirl around frat sweethearts
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A frat sweetheart—sometimes called a “rose” or “dream girl”—is a woman who’s chosen to represent a frat because of their dedication to the organization. But what does it take to be a frat sweetheart, and what exactly do they do? If you’ve got burning questions like those, you’ve come to the right place. In this article, we explain what frat sweethearts do , how to become one , and what to consider before trying to become one . Read on to learn everything you need to know about frat sweethearts!

Fraternity Sweetheart: Quick Definition

A frat sweetheart is a woman (usually a sorority member or someone close to members of the frat) who is selected by a fraternity to represent them, often due to their dedication and how well they mesh with the brothers. They usually help with events, bringing people out, and helping the fraternity reach its goals.

Section 1 of 7:

Frat Sweetheart Meaning

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  1. A frat sweetheart is a woman who’s selected to represent the fraternity. A frat sweetheart is typically a sorority member or other woman who’s chosen to represent and support a certain chapter of a fraternity. They’re typically women who are close to the brothers and who have done lots of work with the fraternity. They don’t have to be members of a sorority, either. They just have to be dedicated to the frat and have similar values. [1]
    • Frat sweethearts tend to only hold the title during the school year in which they were elected.
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Section 2 of 7:

What do frat sweethearts do?

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  1. Frat sweethearts help with projects, event turnout, frat bonding, and more. Frat sweethearts tend to be heavily involved with fraternities, helping them bring sororities out to events and parties, assisting them in various projects throughout the year, and even having dinner with them. Some sweethearts make baked goods for the fraternity and spend time at the house getting to know the brothers. [2]
    • On average, frat sweethearts are typically expected to help with one project or event per week.
Section 3 of 7:

Traits of a Frat Sweetheart

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  1. 1
    Morally strong Many frat sweethearts have strong morals . This means they tend to be honest, respectful, and ethical with what they do. They typically hold their responsibilities with honor and have strong values that guide them towards their goals. This doesn’t mean they don’t like to have fun, but they know they must take care of business beforehand. [3]
    • For example, if a frat member wanted to deface a rival frat’s signage, it may be the sweetheart who dissuades them from doing that, as they know it’s wrong and would reflect poorly on the fraternity if they were caught.
  2. 2
    Sociable Frat sweethearts are often responsible for bringing other sororities out to events and parties. To do so, they have to be sociable and good with people, as they must be able to convince other women to attend events hosted by the fraternity. They also have to be social enough to connect with members of the fraternity, so being extroverted and outgoing is practically a required trait. [4]
    • For example, if a frat is hosting a pie-slapping contest and sending the proceeds to charity, the frat sweetheart may help advertise and get the word out to other sororities and people around campus.
    • They may even play up the opportunity to hit a bunch of frat guys in the face with pies to get more people to attend.
  3. 3
    Smart As a frat sweetheart, you must maintain good grades in order to hold your standing, being smart and knowledgeable is a trait of many. Frat sweethearts don’t have to be the next Einstein or anything, but many of them tend to be smart and well-versed when it comes to charitable events, bringing people out, and other sweetheart responsibilities . [5]
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Section 4 of 7:

How to Become a Frat Sweetheart

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  1. 1
    Get close to the brothers to get nominated. To have a chance at becoming a frat sweetheart, you must have strong connections with some of the brothers. So, start attending events of the fraternity you wish to become a sweetheart for, introduce yourself to the brothers, and get to know the frat members. If you get close to one of them, have them take you to their formal so that the whole frat can get to know you. [6]
    • If you manage to get close and build genuine connections with the brothers, you may end up getting nominated to be a sweetheart.
    • Don’t let your goal to get close to the brothers stop you from having fun at their frat parties ! If anything, having fun with them will help you get closer to them!
  2. 2
    Compete in any competitions or weekly activities. Depending on the chapter you’re trying to become a sweetheart for, you may have to compete in a competition with the other nominees. These competitions may involve making members breakfast, baking them cookies, or even singing for them. Other fraternities may have talent shows or simply nominate those they’re close to. The specific process may vary, depending on the fraternity. [7]
  3. 3
    Wait for the election results. After the nomination and/or competition, members of the fraternity usually vote on the nominees whom they want as the frat sweetheart. These votes are typically held in private, so you’ll have to wait for the brothers to reach an agreement before finding out whether or not you’ve been chosen to be a frat sweetheart. [8]
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Section 5 of 7:

What to Consider Before Becoming a Frat Sweetheart

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  1. 1
    Make sure you have enough time in your schedule. In college, it can feel like there’s so much to do and not enough time in the day. And oftentimes, that’s the case! So, take a few minutes out of your day to scan your schedule and consider whether or not you have enough time to be a frat sweetheart, as you’ll have to dedicate multiple hours of your week or day to this role, depending on your responsibilities. [9]
    • If you’re struggling to fit being a frat sweetheart into your schedule, you might want to wait until your schedule is lighter before joining.
  2. 2
    Make sure the frat is right for you. Every fraternity has different values, opportunities, and experiences, so it’s important to make sure that this frat aligns with your values and the opportunities you’re looking for before you consider becoming their sweetheart. Do your research on the fraternities and their chapters at the university they attend, spend time with the members, and get involved in their activities to see if you mesh well. [10]
    • Educational consultant Alexander Ruiz, M.Ed., says to only get involved with a fraternity that feels like family. “Since these organizations are lifelong networks, students should choose one where they feel comfortable, valued, and heard,” says Ruiz.
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Section 6 of 7:

What do people think of frat sweethearts?

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  1. 1
    Frat sweethearts are respected, honorary fraternity members. Greek Life organizations that have sweethearts often hold them in high regard. This is due to the sweetheart’s dedication to the chapter, connection to the brothers, and strong moral character. As a result, they tend to be treated with dignity and respect. [11]
  2. 2
    However, some people think they’re just around for the guys. Although frat sweethearts tend to be dedicated to the values and goals of their chapter, there are some people who think they’re just in it for the guys. This line of thinking tends to be misogynistic, however, as it’s often accompanied by comments about sweethearts being selected because they’re sleeping with the brothers, which is usually not the case. [12]
    • When faced with comments like this, don’t be afraid to call the person saying them out if it’s safe to do so. Ask questions like, “What did you mean by that?” and “Was it funny?” [13]
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Section 7 of 7:

Are there male sweethearts for sororities?

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  1. Yes, but they aren’t as common as frat sweethearts. Depending on the university, some sororities do have male sweethearts. Like with frat sweethearts, guys who are from other fraternities or who are close to the sorority are typically nominated for the role. They’re usually voted on by members of the sorority. In some cases, they have to participate in contests to be selected. [14]
    • Male sweethearts are a lot less common than frat sweethearts. It’s not unusual for campus Greek Life organizations to not have one at all.
    • If selected, male sweethearts are sometimes allowed to wear the sorority’s letters.

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      References

      1. ↑ https://www.montclair.edu/greek-life/greek-life-glossary/#S
      2. ↑ https://www.theodysseyonline.com/being-fraternity-sweetheart
      3. ↑ https://www.theodysseyonline.com/being-fraternity-sweetheart
      4. ↑ https://www.theodysseyonline.com/being-fraternity-sweetheart
      5. ↑ https://www.theodysseyonline.com/being-fraternity-sweetheart
      6. ↑ https://opensiuc.lib.siu.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1001&context=esh_2014
      7. ↑ https://www.theodysseyonline.com/being-fraternity-sweetheart
      8. ↑ https://www.tke.org/news/2012/06/18/tke-sweetheart-history
      9. ↑ https://summer.harvard.edu/blog/8-time-management-tips-for-students/
      1. ↑ https://www.southwestern.edu/life-at-southwestern/student-organizations/fraternity-and-sorority-life/how-do-i-choose-a-fraternity-or-sorority/
      2. ↑ https://www.theodysseyonline.com/being-fraternity-sweetheart
      3. ↑ https://fraternityman.com/fraternity-sorority-philanthropy-pageants
      4. ↑ https://www.womankind.org.uk/misogyny-runs-deep-how-to-stand-up-to-sexist-language/
      5. ↑ https://georgetoniancom.wordpress.com/2023/03/10/what-its-like-to-be-a-fraternity-sweetheart/

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