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. John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.
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“You up?” seems like an innocent question, but the frequent hidden meaning (“Do you want to hook up tonight?”) can make responding tricky, especially if you’re not sure what your relationship is with the other person. In this article, we’ll dive into exactly what “You up?” means, what it says about the sender’s intentions, and the best ways to reply. Read on!
Things You Should Know
- A “You up?” text is almost always a test to see if you’re interested in a late-night hookup.
- If you’re not interested, just ignore the text or send a sassy comeback like “Unsubscribe” or “Well I am now!”
- If someone sends a “You up?” text, chances are they’re not interested in a serious emotional or romantic relationship.
Steps
“You Up?” Text Meaning
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1A late-night “You up?” text is a way to check if you want to hook up. These texts can be sent by anyone, but they most often come from guys late at night (between 10 p.m. and 2 a.m. or even later). [1] X Research source Usually, the sender is testing the waters to see if you’re willing to meet up for an impromptu booty call or maybe engage in some sexting and share racy photos if the person doesn’t live nearby. The text might include a flirty emoji or joke, but it’s typically a pretty bare-bones message:
- “Hey, you up?”
- “U up? 😈”
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2“You up?” hints that he isn’t super interested in a serious relationship. Someone who feels a real emotional or romantic connection to you probably won’t send a booty call text at 2 a.m., especially if they want to have an adult relationship with you. [2] X Research source This is especially likely if you haven’t heard from him all day and then suddenly receive a raunchy request to meet up right as you’re falling asleep.
- More likely, a “You up?” message shows that he’s mostly interested in hooking up with no strings attached.
- However, every relationship is different! If you have a flirtatious dynamic and spend other quality time together outside of late night hookups, a “You up?” text could just be playful banter.
Replying to a “You Up?” Text
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1Ignore a “U up?” text if you’re not interested or to shut down the behavior. Silence is the best way to express your disinterest. Instead of typing out a response telling him to knock it off, just put your phone on “do not disturb” mode and get a good night’s sleep. [3] X Research source He’ll get the hint that you’re not up for a booty call tonight (or possibly ever if you also don’t reply in the morning).
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2Or, send a thoughtful reply in the morning about how you feel about it. If you want to acknowledge and squash the behavior, wait until the morning to type out a reply. Keep it brief and outline your boundaries around this kind of texting—mention that it makes you uncomfortable or that you don’t want to get physical, and that you won’t respond to these texts in the future:
- “Hey, just so you know, I’m not super comfortable with booty call texts like that. I like you as a friend, but I’m not interested in anything more than that.”
- “Haha, I appreciate the sentiment, but I’m not really up for random late night hookups these days. Probably not gonna answer these kinds of texts tbh.”
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3Text something unrelated in the morning to brush it off. Sometimes, it’s fine to forget about the text and move on with your life (especially if the “You up?” came from a friend or someone you enjoy, but aren’t interested in sexually). Just carry on your text conversations like usual and pretend the “U up?” never happened:
- Them:
[1:48 a.m.] “You up?”
You: [9:30 a.m.] “Hey, what time is Gina’s surprise birthday party tomorrow?” - Them:
[3:02 a.m.] “U up?”
You: [2:40 p.m.] “Omg look at this cute raccoon gif I saw today!”
- Them:
[1:48 a.m.] “You up?”
-
4Send a sassy remark to show you’re annoyed, but not entirely turned off. A “You up?” text isn’t the most romantic gesture in the world, but it’s also not the most egregious thing a guy could send. If you want to acknowledge that you’re unamused without completely writing the guy off, send a sarcastic joke or dry response to let him know you see through his hookup attempt and aren’t interested right now (but maybe aren’t 100% opposed to something happening in the future if he plays his cards right): [4] X Research source
- “I regret to inform you that your booty call cannot be completed as dialed.”
- “Unsubscribe.”
- “Of course, I’m always up at 2:16 a.m. waiting for you to text.”
- “Well I am now, dingus.”
- “This is all I get? No love poem, no sonnet, no haiku?”
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5Reply right away if you’re interested in meeting up. Of course, if you’re having a restless night and are interested in a hookup yourself, go for it! There’s nothing wrong with a late-night booty call if you understand that it doesn’t necessarily mean there’s a deeper connection—make sure you’re doing it because you want to, and not to appease or get closer to whoever sent the “You up?” text. Send a simple “Yeah, what’s up?” or a flirtatious greeting to show you’re interested:
- Them:
“You up?”
You: “Why yes I am 😉 What’s up?” - Them:
“Hey, u up?”
You: “Yeah, I’m just laying in bed all alone and bored…”
- Them:
“You up?”
Less Likely Meanings
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1A “You up?” text could be a genuine question to see if you’re awake. If you receive this text from a friend, family member, or someone you’re confident has no sexual interest in you, chances are they truly want to know if you’re asleep yet or not. It could be for any reason—maybe they need your help on an assignment they procrastinated on, got a flat tire and need a lift, or are just bored and wanting to goof off. Usually, they’ll let you know why they’re texting in the first message:
- “You up? I don’t understand this econ assignment at all…”
- “Hey are u up? I’m locked out of my apartment and need a couch to crash on 🥺”
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2Some “You up?” texts might be an attempt to have a heart-to-heart. If someone you know is going through a hard time, they may just need someone to talk to if they’re alone with their thoughts and feelings. In this case, “You up?” is just a way to see if you’re available to listen or be a virtual shoulder to cry on. This kind of message could come from a friend or loved one (especially if they’ve already let you in on their problems), and they’ll probably let you know why they’re texting:
- “Hey, you up? I’m spiraling right now and could use someone to talk to.”
- “U up? I just had a huge blowout with my parents 😥”
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3“You up?” could mean a friend has something random or silly to share. We’ve all got that one night owl friend who does a day’s worth of texting while you’re trying to sleep. If you receive a “U up?” message from them, they may just have something funny or interesting to share, or maybe an eccentric late-night surprise for you (like a 1 a.m. pizza delivery or gift drop-off):
- Them:
“You up?”
You: “Yeah, why?”
Them: “Good, Justine and Brent just broke up and these screenshots are GOLD” - Them:
“R u up?”
You: “Oh no, what now?”
Them: “I need someone to interview for my new web series, Why Am I Up This Late? ”
- Them:
“You up?”