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Unlike old stereotypes would suggest, elopement doesn't have to mean sneaking out a window with your star-crossed lover and marrying in secret. Plenty of couples elope to escape the hustle of wedding planning or to quickly move onto married life. Research what legal documents you'll need to get your marriage recognized legally. After the ceremony, celebrate with your closest loved ones or with your new spouse on a romantic getaway.
Steps
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Elope at a courthouse for the simplest route. Choosing to elope by registering with the government is not only the most straightforward way but also best if you want to avoid all the fuss of weddings. If you want, you can make it just between the two of you. Plus, you won't have to fuss around with all of the legal documents. [1] X Research source
- Make sure you bring all necessary documents with you: take government-issued IDs, birth certificates, social security cards, and (depending on your country) blood test results.
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Hire an officiant if you'd prefer to elope at a specific location. Most countries will require an officiant of some sort, but that doesn't have to consign your wedding to the courthouse. If you'd like, you can choose a scenic location or a spot that means a lot to both of you. As long as you have an officiant to verify the vows, the world is your oyster.
- If you're hiring an officiant, you don't have to stick to the classic vows. Make them unique to your relationship: don't be afraid to get sentimental, sweet, or even silly.
- Some officiants will complete all of the marriage paperwork for you, after charging a fee. Ask your prospective officiant whether they offer this service.
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Do the paperwork yourself to elope over time. If life is busy right now and, in all ways except legally you consider yourself married, you can skip the ceremony altogether. Fill out the paperwork on your own and send it in when you're both ready. Ask a certified officiant to send the paperwork in for you to officially seal the deal.
- Some countries don't require an officiant but just need witnesses present while filling out the paperwork. In this case, you may be able to send in the paperwork by yourself.
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Invite your family to the elopement for a "quasi-wedding." You don't have to elope alone; in fact, elopement is the perfect opportunity to organize a close-knit ceremony. Invite your closest friends and relatives as you commit to your vows and have a small but fun get-together afterward. [2] X Research source
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Go to Vegas for the novelty. Where's the only place in the world you can hire Elvis (impersonators) as wedding officiants? Vegas, baby! For U.S. citizens, eloping in Las Vegas, Nevada is a wedding and honeymoon all in one, and wedding licenses are easy to procure: no waiting periods or blood tests required. [3] X Research source
- Most wedding chapels in Vegas are open 24/7, every day of the year. Allow for at least four hours when marrying in Vegas. Unless you make wedding reservations, the lines can be long.
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Budget your money to cover legal costs. Between weddings and elopements, the latter is cheaper but that doesn't make it free. Court fees, license costs, and payment for your officiant can all add up. Decide on the amount you're willing to pay with your partner and avoid going over-budget. [4] X Research source
- Eloping can cost as little as $100 to several thousand dollars. Compared to the average wedding cost ($26,000), this is by far the budget-friendly way to get married. [5] X Research source
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Make sure you're old enough to marry. While you can get engaged at any age, most countries only allow couples to marry after both are of legal age (between 17-22). The age that you can get married with parental consent varies between countries but can range from 12-17. [6] X Research source
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Obtain a marriage license. Your country will require different documentation depending on their policies. Some even require waiting periods up to three days before your marriage is considered legal. Contact your local legal department to acquire all necessary documents for a marriage license. [7] X Research source
- If you live in a location that requires a blood test, you can usually get the requirement waived via informed consent.
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Check if your government requires a marriage officiant or witness. Most countries require a marriage officiant, and many have set requirements for who can officiate a wedding. Licensed ministers, clergymen, ship captains, or justices of the peace are all typical officiants. In locations that do not require officiants, a witness will be required to verify the marriage. [8] X Research source
- In the United States, the exception to this rule is Florida, which does not require a witness. [9] X Research source
- In a pinch, have a close friend register as an ordained minister online. This process can require as little as several hours' time and a nominal fee. [10] X Research source
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Fill out a prenuptial agreement. If your elopement is sudden, you might want to file a prenuptial agreement with your future spouse. Prenuptials are legal documents that determine what will happen to your incomes, possessions, and children (if applicable) if the marriage does not work out. [11] X Research source
- Have a lawyer draft or look over your prenuptial agreement to make the document official.
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Hire a professional photographer or videographer. Your marriage, whether you have a wedding or elope, is a moment you and your spouse will want to look back on. Ask a professional to document your vow ceremony or the ring exchange. [12] X Research source
- If you really want to keep the wedding intimate, ask a friend or family member to take photos.
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Wear whatever clothes make you feel happiest. You can wear the traditional wedding dress or tux, or you could wear something fun that expresses your personality (like a button-down with suspenders, a frilly knee-length dress, or an outfit with personal meaning). Eloping doesn't have to mean jeans and a t-shirt at the city clerk's office. [13] X Research source
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Have an "I Do" party in lieu of a reception. If you've chosen to elope, you might not be up for the usual reception party. Instead, treat a few friends to a party after the ceremony. You can make a small registry, or you can ask guests to just bring themselves. Order a wedding cake, pop open a few bottles of champagne, and relax at your own mini-reception.
- Alternatively, go to dinner with your loved ones at a fancy restaurant after the ceremony.
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Go on a honeymoon. After the ceremony and after-party, go on a romantic getaway with your new husband or wife. Because elopement is so inexpensive, you can use some of the money you might have spent on a really nice honeymoon. If you're under time or cost restraints, spend a weekend in a nearby bed-and-breakfast or plan a staycation.
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Community Q&A
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QuestionCan I elope with some guests attending?Community AnswerYes. Traditionally, "eloping" refers to getting married in secret, but today it's more colloquially used to refer to a marriage that is done in haste.
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QuestionMy fiance and I want to elope, because I want to save the money to have a big ceremony later down the line. He's in the military and I'm halfway through college. Is there any etiquette I should consider?Community AnswerElopement by nature defies tradition, so there really is no true etiquette to follow.
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QuestionHow do I elope in secret?Community AnswerTechnically marriages are a matter of public record, so you really can't get legally married and keep it a secret. The closest you can come in the U.S. is to keep the ceremony a secret by doing it inside and not inviting anyone. You will still both have to show up at the courthouse with identification to get the marriage license; however, this can be done at any court in the state you want to be married in. So if you are worried about running into someone you know at the courthouse, put a good hour of road between you and your hometown.
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Tips
- You can always renew your vows years later to experience the traditional marriage.Thanks
- Don't be afraid to put some effort into planning and celebrating your elopement. This is your and your partner's special day. Have some fun, and don't be afraid to splurge a little on dinner or a honeymoon if you can.Thanks
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Warnings
- Elopement is a serious decision. Make sure you won't regret it.Thanks
- Although weddings can be stressful, eloping isn't a way to avoid frustration altogether. You may still need to explain your decision to hurt relatives, struggle through all the wedding paperwork, and pay courthouse fees. Elopement is not the "easy road."Thanks
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Expert Interview
Thanks for reading our article! If you’d like to learn more about eloping, check out our in-depth interview with Andrea Enger .
References
- ↑ https://offbeatbride.com/elope-lessons/
- ↑ https://www.chicagotribune.com/lifestyles/sc-fam-0818-eloping-20150811-story.html
- ↑ https://www.theknot.com/content/eloping-tips-las-vegas
- ↑ https://www.rocketlawyer.com/blog/legal-guide-to-elopement-917095
- ↑ https://www.nytimes.com/2012/03/25/fashion/weddings/Eloping-Does-Not-Mean-What-It-Once-Did.html
- ↑ https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/the-lowest-age-you-can-legally-get-married-around-the-world-10415517.html
- ↑ https://lifehacker.com/the-case-for-eloping-and-how-to-pull-it-off-1786278471
- ↑ https://www.rocketlawyer.com/blog/legal-guide-to-elopement-917095
- ↑ https://www.usmarriagelaws.com/marriage-license/florida/clerks-recorders/office-requirements.shtml
- ↑ https://www.bustle.com/articles/91802-how-to-get-ordained-to-perform-a-wedding-legally-because-this-is-one-thing-you
- ↑ https://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/prenuptial-agreements-overview-29569.html
- ↑ https://www.cnn.com/2014/07/17/living/how-to-elope-matrimony/index.html
- ↑ https://www.theknot.com/content/the-eloping-trend
About This Article
Article Summary
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The simplest way to elope is by taking your identifying documents to the local courthouse, and having a government official register your marriage. Alternatively, hire an officiant and head someplace special, such as your favorite beach or the place you met. If you want to get married immediately, go to Las Vegas, where the chapels are open 24/7. However you choose to elope, make sure to get a marriage license and arrange for any witnesses ahead of time, depending on your state’s requirements. For more information, including how to figure out how much money you’ll need to elope, keep reading!
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Reader Success Stories
- "We are two seniors planning a second marriage for each of us, but the catering costs for 100 people are too much, so now we've begun to think elopement. " ..." more
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"We are two seniors planning a second marriage for each of us, but the catering costs for 100 people are too much, so now we've begun to think elopement. "
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"Helped with understanding why eloping will be a good choice for me."
"I needed to know what documents are needed."
