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The ultimate list of Laffy Taffy jokes to crack up you & your friends
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Laffy Taffy gives you more than just a chewy, fruity treat. The infamously silly jokes printed on the wrapper also bring a little extra joy into your life! But if you want more jokes, you have to eat an awful lot of candy… or keep reading this article! We've compiled a list of more than 110 Laffy Taffy jokes, including jokes about animals , food , sports , and more, so you can have the belly laughs without the bellyache. Plus, we’ll tell you how to submit a joke to Laffy Taffy !

All-Time Best Laffy Taffy Jokes

  • How do billboards talk? Sign language.
  • Where do pigs park their cars? A porking lot.
  • What is a tree’s favorite drink? Root beer.
  • What kind of tea is the hardest? Reality.
  • Which sport involves the most chewing? Gumball.
  • What did zero say to 8? Nice belt.
  • What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.
Section 1 of 10:

Funniest Laffy Taffy Jokes

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  1. Give yourself a case of the giggles with the funniest Laffy Taffy jokes. Laffy Taffy wrapper jokes are a mix of fan suggestions and crowd-sourced puns that are fun and family-friendly. [1] Here’s a list of some of the funniest of the lot:
    • What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
    • What type of brief packs a punch? A boxer brief.
    • How do billboards talk? Sign language.
    • Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
    • Why do shoemakers go to heaven? They have good soles.
    • Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!
    • Did you hear the joke about the toilet? Never mind, it’s too dirty.
    • What did one wall say to the other wall? I’ll meet you at the corner!
    • What do you call a grandmother who tells jokes? A gram cracker.
    • What did one eye say to the other? Between us, something smells.
    • Guess who I ran into on the way to the eye doctor? Everybody!
    • How does a cyclist train for a race? He recycles.
    • Why did the crazy train get in trouble? He had loco-motives.
    • What do you call a fancy salmon? Sofishticated.
    • When is a car not a car? When it turns into a driveway.
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Section 2 of 10:

Laffy Taffy Jokes about Animals

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  1. Use an animal-themed Laffy Taffy joke to have your friends howling. There’s nothing quite like a funny joke featuring their favorite creature to get an animal lover laughing. This list of animal-themed Laffy Taffy jokes is sure to keep them roaring with laughter:
    • Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
    • What did the skunk say when the wind changed? It’s all coming back to me now.
    • Why did the pony eat a cough drop? He was a little hoarse.
    • What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo? A pouch potato.
    • Where should you go if your dog is missing? The lost and hound.
    • Why don’t lobsters share? Because they are shellfish.
    • Why don’t birds follow directions? They like to wing it.
    • What do you call the king’s rabbit? The hare to the throne.
    • How do fish get to the hospital? In a clam-bulance!
    • Why do sharks swim in saltwater? Pepper makes them sneeze.
    • What is a chicken that can count her own eggs? A mathemachicken.
    • Where do pigs park their cars? A porking lot.
    • What can make honey and words? A spelling bee.
    • Where does the sheep get its hair cut? The Baa Baa Shop.
    • Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use honeycombs!
Section 3 of 10:

Laffy Taffy Jokes about Trees & Plants

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  1. Find the funny side of nature with jokes about plants and trees. Mother Nature has a great sense of humor. That’s why these tree and plant-themed Laffy Taffy jokes will leaf you crying with laughter:
    • What kind of plant do you put in a cake? Flower.
    • What do you get when you cross a pig and a cactus? A porkypine.
    • What kind of trees like to give high fives? Palm trees.
    • What is a tree’s favorite drink? Root beer.
    • Why don’t trees use the train? They can never decide on a root.
    • What kind of tree survives without water? A family tree.
    • If fruit comes from a fruit tree, where does chicken come from? A poultry.
    • Why was the cat afraid of the tree? Because of its bark!
    • What’s the best way to carve wood? Whittle by whittle.
    • What did the tree say to the wind? Leaf me alone!
    • What did the crop say to the farmer? Why are you always picking on me?
    • What do trees and people each have? Roots.
    • Why do we not tell secrets in a corn patch? Too many ears.
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Section 4 of 10:

Laffy Taffy Jokes about Food

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  1. Please even the pickiest eaters with Laffy Taffy jokes about food. Did you know laughter burns calories? It’s true! [2] So, have an extra helping of dessert and tell a few of these food-related jokes to help work off the calories:
    • Why did the father yell at the grape? Because it was being un-raisin-able.
    • What room can no one enter? A mushroom.
    • How do you mend a broken jack-o’-lantern? With a pumpkin patch.
    • What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
    • What do you call a sad strawberry? A blueberry.
    • What kind of tea is the hardest? Reality.
    • Why do bananas have to put on sunscreen? They might peel.
    • Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
    • Why is a pancake like the sun? Because it rises in the yeast.
    • Why did the man throw his margarine? He wanted to see the butter fly.
    • When can peanuts laugh? When you crack them up!
    • What is a potato's favorite game? Hash-tag
    • Why was the apple so mean? It was a crab apple.
    • What’s a mummy’s favorite food? Wraps.
Section 5 of 10:

Laffy Taffy Jokes about Sports

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  1. Give your funny bone a workout with these sports-related jokes. Many people take their sports very seriously, but it’s a lot more fun with a healthy sense of humor! If you love to play (or just watch) sports, here’s a whole category of Laffy Taffy jokes that are sure to be a slam dunk:
    • What can you serve but not eat? A tennis ball.
    • What did the grass say to the ball field? I want to root for you.
    • What did the pancake say to the baseball player? Batter up!
    • What did the gum say to the taffy on race day? We’re in the home stretch.
    • What do you call a crab that plays baseball? A pinch hitter.
    • Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he gets a hole-in-one.
    • Why did the bowling pins stop working? They went on a strike.
    • Why did the skier bring wipes? He didn’t want to wipe out.
    • Why do bananas like gymnastics? They like doing the splits.
    • Which sport involves the most chewing? Gumball.
    • Why did the basketball player bring a duck to the game? He wanted to shoot a fowl shot.
    • What runs around a soccer field but never moves? A fence.
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Section 6 of 10:

Smart Laffy Taffy Jokes for School

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  1. Show your smarts with Laffy Taffy jokes that are perfect for school. A silly joke is a great way to make the school day pass more quickly. Try out a few of these school-friendly jokes on your friends:
    • What happened after David had his ID stolen? We had to call him Dav.
    • What did zero say to 8? Nice belt.
    • What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved.
    • What did one triangle say to the other triangle? Let’s get together and square dance.
    • What did the digital clock say to its mom? Look, Mom, no hands.
    • What did the cheerleader say to the ghost? Show your spirit!
    • What did Tennessee? The same thing as Arkansas.
    • What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
    • What's green and fluffy and comes from Mars? A Martian mellow.
    • What building has the most stories? The library.
    • What kind of chain is edible? A food chain.
    • How is a bad joke like a broken pencil? They have no point.
    • What is thin, white, and scary? Homework.
    • Do you know what’s really odd? Numbers not divisible by 2.
    • What did the music teacher say when her students asked if they could sing their favorite song? Of chorus.
Section 7 of 10:

Laffy Taffy-Style Jokes for Adults

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  1. Enjoy a Laffy Taffy-style joke geared toward adults. There’s nothing that says a good, silly joke can’t be about grown-ups. Here’s a list of jokes in the spirit of Laffy Taffy that focus on the foibles of adult life:
    • How are marriages like algebra? When you look at your x, you can’t figure out y.
    • Why did the lion go to therapy? He found out his wife was a cheetah.
    • How is my wallet like an onion? Every time I open it, I cry.
    • What do you call a cow’s illogical point? Moot.
    • Why should you never eat a clock? It’s time-consuming.
    • Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducked.
    • What's the difference between a piano and a fish? You can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish.
    • You know what always makes me smile? Facial muscles.
    • Where would you find a cow who's having a really bad day? McDonald’s.
    • Why did the man miss the funeral? He wasn’t a mourning person.
    • Why did the zombies get divorced? Their marriage was dead.
    • Why don’t cannibals eat clowns? They taste funny.
    • How do you shoot a killer bee? With a bee-bee gun.
    • Why did the skeleton go to the movie by itself? It had no body.
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Section 8 of 10:

Cute Laffy Taffy Puns

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  1. Try a little wacky wordplay with cute Laffy Taffy puns. Puns can be traced as far back as 184 B.C. [3] Even after all that time, people still love them… or love to hate them. Check out this list of some super-cute Laffy Taffy puns to see if any tickle your ribs:
    • What is a parasite? Something you see in Paris.
    • How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it!
    • How should you greet women’s shoes? Hi, heels.
    • Where do hamsters go on vacation? Hamsterdam.
    • How do you turn soup into gold? Add 24 carrots.
    • What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.
    • When does it rain money? When there is a change in the weather.
    • What button can’t unbutton? Your belly button.
    • What did the lunch lady say to Luke Skywalker? Use the forks, Luke.
    • What do you call a lazy bull? A bulldozer
    • How do you organize a space party? You planet!
    • What car does a ghost drive? A Boo-ick
    • Why did the bird go to the hospital? To get tweetment.
Section 9 of 10:

Submitting Your Laffy Taffy Joke

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  1. Submit your original Laffy Taffy joke at the official website . If you have a Laffy Taffy-style joke you want to see printed on a wrapper, you can submit it at www.laffytaffy.com/yourjokes. Just type in the setup in the space at the top of the wrapper and your punchline at the bottom. Then, click Submit and you’re done! [4]
    • Laffy Taffy jokes are usually in the form of a setup and a punchline.
    • Only submit clean jokes. Laffy Taffy only uses jokes that are fun for the whole family.
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