Q&A for How to Deal With a Runaway Teen

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  • Question
    My friend wants to runaway and I don't know how to help or if I should tell an adult. What do I do?
    Community Answer
    I've been through this and I really thought I would lose my friend. I talked to her and she wouldn't listen to me so I had to talk to my parents. My mom talked to her parents and my friend didn't talk to me for two months because I "betrayed" her. I think she went to a really good psychologist. We are finally friends again, but it took her a little while to come back to me. Support your friend, show him/her that you won't let go and eventually tell him/her to talk to his/her parents.
  • Question
    What about a situation where the teen's homeless because one parent won't allow that teen to live in the home?
    Community Answer
    Call Child Protective Services. They will most likely place the child with other family members or with a foster family.
  • Question
    My teen runs away repeatedly. Now he's 18 and we don't know what to do. He doesn't have any reason to not to contact us, and he doesn't.
    Community Answer
    He is a teenager. Teenagers grow and they want to explore. He might have run away because he wants something or feels something is missing from his life. Ask him what he wants. It may be that he just needs to learn something very important the hard way. Just let him know that you are always there for him if he needs you.
  • Question
    My cousin went into social services and doesn't want to talk to family. How do I get in touch with him and slowly rebuild a relationship where he knows he can trust and say anything to me and I won't rat him out?
    Community Answer
    You can tell him he can trust you, and then you can tell him one of your secrets so that he knows that you trust him.
  • Question
    I had a fight with my sister and she left. What should I do to get her to come home?
    Community Answer
    If you can get in touch with her, apologize to her and tell her what she means to you.
  • Question
    How do I handle it if my child's friend needs a place to stay because they got kicked out by their parents?
    Community Answer
    It depends. If it's for a relatively mild reason and they're likely to patch things up pretty quickly, invite them to stay on your couch for a day or two but make sure they know it's temporary. If it's something serious (the child was abused, the child was kicked out for being gay, trans, etc.), you might have to get social services involved. Of course, you're not absolutely required to do anything, it's all up to your discretion.
  • Question
    If my teen has become violent and run away on several occasions, should I have the police return him only to either have him run away or become violent again?
    Community Answer
    If your teen is acting out violently, he made need to see a therapist to learn how to deal with his anger issues. This will likely only get worse as he becomes an adult, so be proactive about seeking help for him now.
  • Question
    What if I stayed at a friend's house, but they didn't know I ran away? Could they get in trouble with the law?
    Community Answer
    Harboring a runaway is illegal, so there is a chance they could get in trouble, even if they didn't technically know you were a runaway. It would be best to just be honest with your friend so they can make a decision for themselves about whether or not to let you stay with them.
  • Question
    My cousin (15 years old) left home and doesn't want to keep in touch with or go back to his immediate family. We were always close, how do I let him know I'm fine with that, want to keep in touch and won't snitch or send him back?
    Community Answer
    If he left not too long ago, maybe he just needs space for now. If you feel the time is right, you could try putting your feelings down in a note/letter and giving it to him.
  • Question
    What can I do to help if I think my sibling may possibly run away?
    Community Answer
    Confront your sibling, but not in an accusatory manner. Be gentle, understanding, and compassionate; try to see the situation from their perspective. Acknowledge and validate any hurt or anger they may be feeling, but encourage them to cope with it in healthier, more productive ways. As a last resort, alert your parents to your fears so they can keep a closer eye on your sibling.
  • Question
    What should I do if none of this works?
    Community Answer
    Contact the police and social services in your area for help.
  • Question
    My 15 year-old daughter ran away to a house full of men, will not speak with me and is not going to school. What can I do?
    Community Answer
    Either try reasoning with her or the men. Otherwise, you could call the police, but the best thing to do is try reasoning with her.
  • Question
    I'm a 13-year-old girl with autism, and my mom doesn't understand how my brain works. It's causing a wedge in my family. I want to run to my dad's house, which is a 6 hour walking distance. Advice?
    Community Answer
    Don't walk. I have done this. It doesn't help. Have a calm, respectful conversation with your mom about the possibility of moving in with your dad. If you're afraid she won't listen to you or understand you, talk to another trusted adult first, like a teacher or counselor, and ask them to help you talk to your mom. If you run away, you'll be putting yourself in danger, and if you even make it to your dad's, he will likely have to send you right back, and your mom will be really mad.
  • Question
    My 14 year old grandson got caught sneaking out at night, then ran away to prevent punishment. This was 2 weeks ago. We believe he’s at a friend’s house, but the friend's parent denies this. Need a little help.
    Top Answerer
    Take this as a sign that some kind of abuse may be happening at home. Running away to avoid punishment is a good sign that something abusive is happening. He may be afraid for his life because he knows he will get beaten or locked in his room when he gets home.
  • Question
    My daughter is 16 years old and she's so fearless, does not come to sleep at home sometimes and keeps male friends. What do I do to make her trust me with anything?
    Claire Compton
    Community Answer
    It sounds like what your daughter needs is some support. Talk to her about how you love her and tell her you're not mad, but just want to make sure she's safe. Your daughter will appreciate your kindness, and may trust you with more things then if you responded with anger or threats.
  • Question
    What happens if I want to run away? How do I tell my parents that?
    Whiskas Que
    Community Answer
    If you want to inform your parents about your feelings, you should find a time where you can talk to them. Tell them your feelings and why you want to run away. Maybe then you will find a solution that does not involve running away.
  • Question
    I have an adult daughter who hides her younger siblings from me and refuses to return them home or will hide them with friends. I have called the police and filed a missing person .
    Community Answer
    Try not to take any extreme measures at first. Ask your daughter why she's hiding her younger siblings from you. If you're genuinely worried that your kids may be in trouble, then that's when you should call law enforcement.
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