It might seem like there's no escaping that embarrassing flush of the cheeks every time you look at your crush, hear an off-color joke, or make a mistake. It feels like that, but that doesn't have to be the case. Some people blush in social situations in which they feel embarrassed; others blush for no reason at all, which in turn causes embarrassment. Some people even have an intense fear of blushing, called erythrophobia. If you feel like your blushing is getting in the way of normal social interactions and you want solutions to your problem, read on for some tips on how to avoid blushing.
Steps
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Snap out of it by relaxing your body. When you blush, you can quickly help fade the redness by relaxing your muscles, particularly in your shoulders and neck. Try to let go of the tension that you are suddenly holding on to. Keep your posture upright and your legs balanced.
- In order to relax, try:
- Remembering to breathe in and out (deeply if you can). [1]
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Expert Source
Donna Novak, Psy.D
Licensed Clinical Psychologist Expert Interview. 8 December 2020. - Reminding yourself that this isn't the first time you have blushed and it probably won't be the last time. This can be oddly comforting.
- Smiling. Smiling may help as our cheeks naturally redden when we smile; smiling also helps us feel happier [2] X Research source , which may destroy any social anxiety.
- Remembering to breathe in and out (deeply if you can). [1]
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Expert Source
Donna Novak, Psy.D
- In order to relax, try:
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Don't fixate on blushing. Many people fixate on their blushing when it happens, worsening their social anxiety. And research shows that the more we think about blushing, the more we blush. [3] X Trustworthy Source PubMed Central Journal archive from the U.S. National Institutes of Health Go to source If you can find a way to stop fixating on blushing, chances are you'll actually blush less!Advertisement
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Consider calling attention to it. If a person's on a date and they do something incredibly awkward, one way that they'll save the situation is by calling attention to it: "Well, now, that was clumsy. I promise I'm only a klutz half of the time!" By calling attention to the awkwardness and putting it out in the open, they've unmasked it. The awkwardness usually leaves right then and there. You can do the same thing with blushing.
- It's obviously not something you can do every time, in every situation, but consider it a tool you can use. Your blushing often gets worse because you're afraid of people uncovering your anxiety. If you defuse the anxiety before other people have time to realize it, you have no reason to blush anymore.
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Try rehearsing thought exercises. In order to help you feel both cooler (as in physically colder, but also street-wise) and to distract you from the blushing itself, try several thought exercises:
- Imagine jumping in an ice-cold lake. Imagine diving deep down to the bottom of the lake while feeling the cold water wash over your limbs and skin. It'll help you cool down and should relax you a bit.
- Imagine people in their underwear. For some odd reason, this public-speaking trick really works. It makes you feel like everyone else is human, and that you're not the only one who makes mistakes. More often than not, it'll make you chuckle.
- Compare your situation to other people in the world. You feel embarrassed because you need to get up and talk in front of your class, perhaps. That's a piece of cake compared to fighting for your life or struggling to find food. Remind yourself of how good you have it.
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Understand what blushing is. Blushing is the involuntary rushing of blood to the face, usually brought on by social anxiety. Blushing causes redness and sometimes perspiration. Blushing is made worse by the fact that the face has more capillary loops and more blood vessels than other skin areas, making blushing in the face particularly visible.
- Understand that blushing can be caused for no "social" reason at all. Most people blush when they feel uncomfortable in a social situation. Other people blush for no apparent social reason at all. This kind of unprovoked blushing is called idiopathic craniofacial erythema.
- Understand that some people have a legitimate phobia of blushing, called erythrophobia. People suffering from erythrophobia may wish to seek out counseling as they try to overcome their fear.
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Try to prevent blushing in the first place, if possible. Find out when you blush. Is it when you're angry, or when you're nervous? Is it when you look at or think of a certain someone? Is it when you're put in the spotlight? Don't necessarily try to avoid whatever makes you blush, but try to condition your body to believe that there is no reason to blush when it comes along. This is the first step in beating the blushing.
- Make a list of all the recent times you remember blushing, especially if you blushed social situations. Write the outcome of the social situation. Were you made fun of? Did people notice? In most cases, decent people don't think that blushing is a problem and don't point it out. And why should they? It's not something that you can control. Start understanding that blushing isn't always as important as you think it might be.
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Don't feel responsible for blushing. Whatever you do, don't feel responsible for blushing. It is involuntary. Train your mind to understand that your conscious thoughts have nothing to do with this autonomic bodily response. You are not to blame, and you are not guilty of anything. If you let go of feeling responsible for blushing, there's a good chance you'll find yourself blushing less often.
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Stop caring. Not only is your blushing much less noticeable than you probably think, but it's also helpful to remember that most people either find blushing to be cute or endearing. There are benefits to being a blusher. They include:
- People who witness someone blush find the blusher to be more sympathetic, softening their social judgments of the person. [4] X Research source In this way, blushing may help build better social bonds.
- Researchers believe that people who blush are better at relationships, reporting higher levels of monogamy and trustworthiness. [5] X Research source
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Work out strenuously before you feel you might get embarrassed. This does two things: your face will have a natural red hue that looks more "normal," and you'll lower your blood pressure so much that you could become effectively immune to blushing, based on how hard and long you work out, for anywhere between 30 minutes to 2 hours. Even if your redness from working out fades, this temporary immunity will continue.
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Find helpful relaxation techniques. Prime your mind and your body to relax before the blushing sets in through meditation or gentle exercise. Feeling relaxed and in control could help you prevent blushing from occurring in the first place.
- Try yoga. Yoga is the perfect mind/body exercise that will help center your thoughts and provide enough physical stimulation to get blood flowing throughout your body, not just in your face. Experiment with different types of yoga; there are dozens. Find the style that best suits you.
- Try gentle meditation. Meditation can mean so many different things. One form of meditation that you can try is simply becoming aware of your body and shooting that awareness out to the very edges of your body, achieving a kind of release. Focus first on the thoughts in your head, and then gradually move your awareness to the edges of your body, until you are aware of your body as a whole.
Expert Q&A
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QuestionHow do I stop being awkward and cringe?Dr. Nicole Lippman-Barile is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist and a Nutritional Therapy Practitioner (NTP) who practices in New York. As a psychologist, she specializes in treating anxiety and mood disorders, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD), and related compulsive disorders. As a nutritional therapist, Dr. Lippman-Barile specializes in treating blood sugar dysregulation, digestive health, and mood disorders related to food. She holds a PhD in Clinical Psychology from Hofstra University and a Nutritional Therapy Practitioner Certification from the Nutritional Therapy Association.You might not actually be coming off as awkward! We tend to think that people can pick up how we're feeling and being in a social moment—but a lot of times, that's not true. Instead, it helps to get out of your head and engage with something completely different in the environment. Try using mindfulness tactics to get out your head and live in the present moment so you can normalize the situation you're in.
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QuestionHow can I get over an embarrassing experience?Samantha Fox is a Marriage & Family Therapist in private practice in New York, New York. With over a decade of experience, Samantha specializes in relationship, sexuality, identity, and family conflicts. She also advises on life transitions for individuals, couples, and families. She holds both a Master’s degree and a Marriage and Family Therapy License. Samantha is trained in Internal Family Systems (IFS), Accelerated Experiential Dynamic Psychotherapy (AEDP), Emotion Focused Couples Therapy (EFT), and Narrative Therapy.Everyone at some point has an embarrassing experience. We are human and we make mistakes–this is how we learn! When you find yourself fixating on it, take a moment to find the feeling you have in your physical body around this experience. Connect to it (as uncomfortable as it might be) and become curious as to what might happen if you weren’t ruminating. It’s likely that the rumination is a part of you that is protecting you from making the same blunder again by keeping it fresh and alive. Validate that feeling, ask it if there is anything more it needs you to know, and then thank it for trying to protect you from repeating the same embarrassment. Let this part of you know that you learned from the experience and need that part of yourself to take a step back now.
Reader Videos
Tips
- If you want to avoid blushing for a particular event, like a speech, drink a full water bottle of ice-cold water about 5 to 10 minutes before. Drink it sort of quickly, but it doesn't have to be fast enough to make you sick. This will cause all blushing to stop for about 30 minutes, and it really works.Thanks
- Drink lots of water! A lot of times blushing occurs because of dehydration.Thanks
- Breathe deeply . It helps prevent and disperse blushing.Thanks
Tips from our Readers
- Try this simple technique: a few minutes a day, imagine your hands are in front of a fire, and focus on the heat specifically. By doing this daily your body will send to blood flow and warmth to your hands and not your face and cheeks.
- Don't think about if you're blushing or not. Just do something else that might get less attention from people around you. Be yourself and don't let blushing ruin your life!
Warnings
- Don't think about trying not to blush and what's going to happen if you do blush because this will make you blush. Just remain calm and don't think about blushing.Thanks
- Remember, if you are a teenager, blushing could be hormonal.Thanks
Expert Interview
Thanks for reading our article! If you’d like to learn more about communication, check out our in-depth interview with Donna Novak, Psy.D .
References
- ↑ Donna Novak, Psy.D. Licensed Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 8 December 2020.
- ↑ https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/smile-it-could-make-you-happier/
- ↑ http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2855024/
- ↑ https://www.nytimes.com/2009/06/02/health/02mind.html?_r=0
- ↑ http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2044467/Blushing-New-research-shows-sign-youll-great-lover.html
About This Article
To avoid blushing, try taking a deep breath and relaxing your muscles, which can help quickly fade any redness on your face. Also, try exercising for at least 30 minutes before an event you're worried about blushing at, which will lower your blood pressure so you're less likely to blush. You can also meditate or do some yoga to relax your body and prevent blushing. To learn how to overcome the underlying causes of blushing, scroll down!
Reader Success Stories
- "The article was very informative, and shed some light on the more positive aspects of blushing as well. Overall, I'd say it was very helpful, and I'll keep in mind any tips or reminders said in the article." ..." more