Q&A for How to Mingle With Strangers at Parties

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How do you socialize at a party where you don't know anyone?

Amiccio
Social Events Host
Amiccio is a Social Events organization based in New York, New York. Amiccio hosts social events to help people make new connections, whether they are new to the city, or just wish to expand beyond their existing social network. Amiccio’s efforts focus on connecting singles and new friends by hosting socials, dance classes, and speed dating events.

Amiccio

Social Events Host

Expert Answer

Strike up a conversation about something happening at the party, recent local events, or popular trends and news. You can also ask the person how they found out about the event and/or what they like to do in their free time.

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Question

How can I mingle with others?

Klare Heston, LCSW
Licensed Social Worker
Klare Heston is a Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker based in Cleveland, Ohio. With experience in academic counseling and clinical supervision, Klare received her Master of Social Work from the Virginia Commonwealth University in 1983. She also holds a 2-Year Post-Graduate Certificate from the Gestalt Institute of Cleveland, as well as certification in Family Therapy, Supervision, Mediation, and Trauma Recovery and Treatment (EMDR).

Klare Heston, LCSW

Licensed Social Worker

Expert Answer

You can work up some topics of conversation before leaving for a social event. Decide in advance how much time you will spend with each person before moving on to the next person. Plan to talk to at least 3-5 new people. This way you shouldn't run out of topics and can use some of the same material.

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Question

What is small talk in communication skills?

Klare Heston, LCSW
Licensed Social Worker
Klare Heston is a Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker based in Cleveland, Ohio. With experience in academic counseling and clinical supervision, Klare received her Master of Social Work from the Virginia Commonwealth University in 1983. She also holds a 2-Year Post-Graduate Certificate from the Gestalt Institute of Cleveland, as well as certification in Family Therapy, Supervision, Mediation, and Trauma Recovery and Treatment (EMDR).

Klare Heston, LCSW

Licensed Social Worker

Expert Answer

Small talk is generally thought of as very general statements or questions that don't require any personal sharing risk. It includes things like the weather, the time, and asking where someone is from. The purpose of small talk is not necessarily to get to know someone on a deeper level.

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Question

How can I avoid small talk?

Klare Heston, LCSW
Licensed Social Worker
Klare Heston is a Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker based in Cleveland, Ohio. With experience in academic counseling and clinical supervision, Klare received her Master of Social Work from the Virginia Commonwealth University in 1983. She also holds a 2-Year Post-Graduate Certificate from the Gestalt Institute of Cleveland, as well as certification in Family Therapy, Supervision, Mediation, and Trauma Recovery and Treatment (EMDR).

Klare Heston, LCSW

Licensed Social Worker

Expert Answer

A little bit of small talk is ok. You can readily pick up on something more important from some initial small talk. For example, if you first talk about the weather, you can then ask, "What do you like to do on rainy days?" This can lead you to get to know one another.

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Question

How do you become the life of the party?

Klare Heston, LCSW
Licensed Social Worker
Klare Heston is a Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker based in Cleveland, Ohio. With experience in academic counseling and clinical supervision, Klare received her Master of Social Work from the Virginia Commonwealth University in 1983. She also holds a 2-Year Post-Graduate Certificate from the Gestalt Institute of Cleveland, as well as certification in Family Therapy, Supervision, Mediation, and Trauma Recovery and Treatment (EMDR).

Klare Heston, LCSW

Licensed Social Worker

Expert Answer

Be interested in everyone around you. Don't just fixate on one or two people. Assume you can find something interesting in everyone. Others will notice that you seem genuinely interested in them. Be willing to talk about yourself, laugh at yourself, and share some stories. Be sure to ask others about themselves and don't just talk about you. Smile a lot!

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