This article was reviewed by Tami Claytor
. Tami Claytor is an Etiquette Coach, Image Consultant, and the Owner of Always Appropriate Image and Etiquette Consulting in New York, New York. With over 20 years of experience, Tami specializes in teaching etiquette classes to individuals, students, companies, and community organizations. Tami has spent decades studying cultures through her extensive travels across five continents and has created cultural diversity workshops to promote social justice and cross-cultural awareness. She holds a BA in Economics with a concentration in International Relations from Clark University. Tami studied at the Ophelia DeVore School of Charm and the Fashion Institute of Technology, where she earned her Image Consultant Certification.
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Are you interested in learning where someone works? Maybe you just met someone and you want to get to know them better, or you’re hoping to get valuable career advice. Whatever the reason, asking directly can sometimes feel personal or overly specific, even though it's often a common or standard question. Don’t worry--in this article we’ll cover a variety of approaches and tips (both subtle and direct) that you can use to ask someone about their job while being as polite and sensitive as possible.
Steps
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Someone’s interests may be the same as their job. In this case, they might naturally bring up the place they work when they explain their passions to you--so this approach is great if you’re worried about being too direct. [1] X Trustworthy Source Harvard Business Review Online and print journal covering topics related to business management practices Go to source
- For example, you can ask, “What do you like doing for fun?” or “What do you find interesting?”
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Someone may not be working where they want to be. As a result, they may mention where they currently work while explaining their future goals. [2] X Trustworthy Source Harvard Business Review Online and print journal covering topics related to business management practices Go to source
- For example, you can ask, “Where do you see yourself in 5 years?” or “If you could have any job, what would it be and why?” or “What are you looking forward to?”
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Work is a major part of many people’s daily lives. Many full-time employees report working even more than 40 hours a week. When someone describes their daily routine, they may naturally mention where they are employed. [3] X Research source
- For example, you can ask, “What have you been up to these days?” or “How did your week go?”
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This might trigger a conversation about their job. Though this question is more indirect, work-life balance can be a major part of someone’s current concerns. This may lead them to discuss what the work-life balance is like where they are currently employed. [4] X Research source
- For example, you can ask, “How has your work-life balance been lately?“ or “How is the work-life balance at your company?” or “What does a typical day at work look like for you?”
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People are often eager to share what they’ve learned in their career. They may reference their specific workplace when giving career advice. However, if they give more general advice, you can try asking more specific follow-up questions to guide them to mentioning their employer.
- For example, you can ask, “What is the most important thing you’ve learned while working?” or “What is something important to know about the industry?” or “What would you say are essential soft and hard skills to have at your company?”
- Even if you don’t work in the same industry or have the same interests, getting career advice or even general tips can be really valuable. You may be able to use the advice to structure your own goals. [5] X Research source
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Referencing a specific industry might get them talking about their work. This approach might be especially useful if you already know the field or industry someone works in, because there is less to narrow down. [6] X Trustworthy Source Harvard Business Review Online and print journal covering topics related to business management practices Go to source
- For example, you can ask, “What excites you right now about your industry?” or “How is your company keeping up with publishing trends?” or “Is your company also shifting away from the current finance strategies?”
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This can be a great way to get someone talking about their specific workplace. However, be aware that is more direct than simply asking about a topic or daily routine. It also means that you are assuming someone is employed. [7] X Trustworthy Source Harvard Business Review Online and print journal covering topics related to business management practices Go to source
- For example, you can ask, “What's your favorite and least favorite part of your job?” or “What really excites you about your job?”
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What somebody studied may correspond to their current job. This provides an opportunity for them to tell a story rather than just give a one-word answer as they describe their job and possibly mention their employer. Even if this isn’t the case, the person may mention how they have changed jobs and ended up at their current workplace. [8] X Research source
- For example, you can ask, “What did you study in college?” or “What did you do after college?”
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Help the other person feel more comfortable by bringing up the topic first. It’s possible someone may not want to talk about work because they are afraid to offend you. If you mention your own workplace or employer first, you are establishing a common ground that the topic is okay and resonates with both of you. [9] X Research source
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In certain settings it may not be impolite to simply ask directly. Perhaps you are at a professional conference or business meeting where employment is a standard topic. Or, perhaps the conversation has been going well so far and you think that it wouldn’t be an uncomfortable topic. In these cases, you can consider asking directly while still encouraging the other person to tell a story about themselves. [10] X Research source
- For example, you can ask, “Which company are you working for right now and what was your path there?” or “May I ask where you are currently working, and why?”
Expert Q&A
Tips
- Regardless of which approach you take, show that you are actively listening to the other person. Listening effectively and showing curiosity will help them feel that their thoughts are valued, and allow you to gain new information. [11] X Research sourceThanks
- Continue to ask questions throughout the conversation! Not only do people enjoy talking about themselves, but this can also help you find common ground. [12] X Research sourceThanks
- Overall, be cautious when deciding whether and how you should ask someone where they work in the first place. People may be unhappy with their jobs, retired, or not employed, so this can be a sensitive question. Even if you decide not to ask in the end, people spend so much time working that they may mention it themselves later.Thanks
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References
- ↑ https://hbr.org/2018/01/8-questions-to-ask-someone-other-than-what-do-you-do /
- ↑ https://hbr.org/2018/01/8-questions-to-ask-someone-other-than-what-do-you-do
- ↑ https://buffer.com/resources/27-question-to-ask-instead-of-what-do-you-do/
- ↑ https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/10-interview-questions-ask-reveal-companys-work-life-balance-macrae/
- ↑ https://www.indeed.com/career-advice/interviewing/questions-to-ask-someone-about-their-job
- ↑ https://hbr.org/2018/01/8-questions-to-ask-someone-other-than-what-do-you-do
- ↑ https://hbr.org/2018/01/8-questions-to-ask-someone-other-than-what-do-you-do
- ↑ https://buffer.com/resources/27-question-to-ask-instead-of-what-do-you-do/
- ↑ https://www.forbes.com/sites/theyec/2020/01/14/how-to-connect-with-customers-before-getting-down-to-business/?sh=4edff1a478b2