How to Comfort the Dying

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Everyone should live life to the fullest. This means even a dying person should be given the highest quality of life for every living moment.

Steps

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  1. Do not let a person die alone. Let them experience love and friendship as they pass. If the person is unresponsive, hold their hand and talk to them.
  2. Contract a hospice nurse to provide pain management. Provide a special mattress to alleviate pressure. Offer water, but do not force hydration. If the person is incontinent, keep them clean and dry.
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  3. The transition out of this life can be a source of anxiety or fear. Offer a conversation of faith or peace.
  4. It may seem humiliating to a person when they are incontinent or totally dependent on others for activities of daily living. Tell the person how you admire and respect them.
  5. Talk about times and occasions in life that were important to the dying person. Talk about humorous incidents. Talk about activities and hobbies that have been rewarding. Talk to family members about what they would consider the significant events of their loved one's life.
  6. Don't do all the talking. Don't be afraid to sit in silence.
  7. Bring in meals. Offer time for respite. Promise to be available during bereavement.
  8. Back off of any intervention that makes the dying person uncomfortable. Be thoughtful and considerate.
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  • Question
    My husband is dying at home, and all I seem to be able to do is cry. Any suggestions?
    Community Answer
    Instead of focusing on the fact he is passing away, focus on making his last days at home the best days of his life. This might help him feel better about the situation, while helping you feel as if you have performed a good deed for your husband. For example, make his favorite dinners, take him to do things he always wanted to do but never got the chance. This can help both of you through this.
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  • Question
    Won't bringing back memories just make them feel scared and unprepared to pass?
    Community Answer
    No, it will bring them peace to remember the happy times they had on earth. Focus on the good things that person did for others and the difference they made during their life.
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  • Question
    How can I help the spouse of someone who is dying?
    Community Answer
    Just be there for support. You cannot make it easier, nor can you stop the pain, anger and sadness that will come. Just be there.
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      Tips

      • Initiate hospice services sooner rather than later. Do not wait until the person is actively dying. Admit the person as soon as they are eligible for hospice.
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      • Most hospice organizations will provide a nurse, health aid, social worker, chaplain and volunteer services to a terminally ill person.
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      • Remember, every one of us will face the experience of dying.
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