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You found the guy you really like, and now you two are dating. Is it time to kiss? If you answered yes to that question, keep reading.
Steps
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Be willing and ready. First off, make sure you are kissing for yourself, not because your friends dared you to, or you have been dating so long that you are far past the make-out point. Do this for yourself, so make sure you are ready to kiss him, both physically and emotionally.
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Get the obvious stuff out of the way. Have a fresh breath, and soft lips, look nice and make sure that the "touch barrier" has been broken with hugs and flirtatious gestures.
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Get into the right place. This task is harder than people think, if it's hard to get into a place that is private, then the school might be the best place there is, for now, just make sure that you aren't being watched by a teacher or any other unwanted viewer.
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Talk for a moment. If it's the end of the day, and you both are about to go your separate ways, then now is your chance, give him a hug and hold it for about 5 seconds, then pull back a bit, but don't move your arms.EXPERT TIPDating CoachJohn Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.
Ease into your first kiss. Start with a casual touch, like holding hands. As comfort grows, progress to a gentle arm around the shoulder. Read his body language–sustained eye contact and corresponding touch are positive signs. If all feels right, lean in slowly and wait for his response.
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Look into his eyes. Forget about being nervous. Think about this going great, because if you do this step properly, kissing will be the easiest thing in the world. Look into his eyes, tilt your head just a bit to avoid colliding, lean in and gently close your eyes, and kiss him.
- Try to look for a good window of opportunity! If he's in the mood to kiss, he'll be making eye contact and mirroring your body language.
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Don't forget to breathe (breath gently in and out of your nose) and kiss his bottom lip. Hold the kiss for about 10 seconds, keeping your eyes closed, after about 10 seconds, pull away, smile at him, and be happy for the rest of the day.
Join the Discussion...
I'm 25 and haven't had my first kiss yet. I can't help but feel like I'm behind :( I feel hopless about my love life. Am I just doomed to be alone forever? How do I have my first kiss?
For your first kiss, take it easy and build up to the moment. Start with a little bit of light physical contact. You might start by massaging her hand, then moving up her arm. You're basically building up the level of intimacy and also seeing how comfortable she is, because if she's not comfortable with this physical touch, she's not going to be comfortable with you kissing her either.
To look for an opportunity for your first kiss, wait for a pause where there's a lot of romantic tension—you're looking into each other's eyes and there’s that kind of awkward smile when you're looking at each other. You might just want to go for it then! Reach over behind her head gently or lean up to reach her and then go for a kiss. You're going to find out very quickly if it's going to work or not because she's either going to turn her head or move away or respond well and lean into it.
Usually in that kind of moment, it's easy to feel that romantic tension. You're both looking at each other's eyes very intently. You're both smiling. There's a pause. Nobody's saying anything. That's a great time to just go for your first kiss!
To look for an opportunity for your first kiss, wait for a pause where there's a lot of romantic tension—you're looking into each other's eyes and there’s that kind of awkward smile when you're looking at each other. You might just want to go for it then! Reach over behind her head gently or lean up to reach her and then go for a kiss. You're going to find out very quickly if it's going to work or not because she's either going to turn her head or move away or respond well and lean into it.
Usually in that kind of moment, it's easy to feel that romantic tension. You're both looking at each other's eyes very intently. You're both smiling. There's a pause. Nobody's saying anything. That's a great time to just go for your first kiss!
Avoid Awkward Kisses with this Expert Series
Are you worried about having a bad kiss? These expert articles will build your confidence and help you avoid awkward situations.
Community Q&A
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QuestionMy boyfriend is uncomfortable with kissing but I want us to kiss. What should I do?Hannah MaddenCommunity AnswerAlways respect the person who you want to kiss, and don't force anything on them. If your boyfriend is uncomfortable with kissing, you should wait until he's ready.
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QuestionSo my friends dared me to kiss my bf. Does that count as our first kiss?Hannah MaddenCommunity AnswerIf you and your boyfriend have kissed and you want to count it as your first one, then yes, it counts! But if you did it because of a dare and you want a re-do, you 2 can always kiss again at a more appropriate time and count that one as your first kiss instead. It's up to you and your boyfriend to decide what your first kiss is.
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QuestionWhat if he doesn't want to be kissed and freaks out? I'd be so embarrassed.Hannah MaddenCommunity AnswerIf your boyfriend doesn't want to kiss you, that's okay! Not everyone is ready to kiss in middle school. You should respect his wishes and try not to take it personally. If you're worried he might not be ready, try asking him directly.
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Tips
- A guy will be happy with you kissing him, no matter how you do it.Thanks
- Focus on the kiss, not what he is thinking, or else you won't want to kiss again thinking that you failed miserably, or that he didn't like kissing you.Thanks
- Make sure he wants a kiss, if he doesn't none of these steps will work, creating a very awkward situationThanks
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Warnings
- If you are kissing in school, don't do it in front of a teacher.Thanks
About This Article
Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 147,319 times.
Reader Success Stories
- "This article helped a lot. My boyfriend said he wanted to kiss me, but admitted to my friend that he didn't know how to kiss. My friend told him that I had experience, but in reality, I don't know how to kiss, but now I do!" ..." more
"This article helped a lot. My boyfriend said he wanted to kiss me, but admitted to my friend that he didn't know how to kiss. My friend told him that I had experience, but in reality, I don't know how to kiss, but now I do!"
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"It is certainly a helpful article. I haven't also kissed him. This is only my first boyfriend. I hope it works out. He keeps looking at me like he wants to, but I am not really sure I like him in that way."
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"I think Step 5 and 6 were the most helpful. Everything that was written on both the steps eased out my nervousness and worries. Now I know how to kiss for the first time in middle school!"
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"I always felt nervous whenever he asked for my permission to kiss me, but with your help, I felt whole and confident. Now he respects me more than before, thanks."
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"I did it and he kissed back it was crazy. I didn't think about it and just went for it. I stopped about halfway and he came the rest."
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