Download Article
Set simple boundaries to create a memorable Yes Day with your kids
Download Article
X
This article was co-authored by Wits End Parenting
and by wikiHow staff writer, Raven Minyard, BA
. Wits End Parenting is a parent-coaching practice based in Berkeley, California specializing in strong-willed, “spirited” children with impulsivity, emotional volatility, difficulty “listening,” defiance, and aggression. Wits End Parenting's counselors incorporate positive discipline that is tailored to each child’s temperament while also providing long-term results, freeing parents from the need to continually re-invent their discipline strategies.
There are 15 references
cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
This article has been fact-checked, ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the authority of its sources.
This article has been viewed 2,133 times.
A Yes Day, popularized by the Jennifer Garner movie of the same name, is a day in which parents say yes to all their children’s requests. Well, all requests within reason. Because you never know what wacky ideas kids will come up with, it’s important to set some ground rules beforehand to make sure everyone stays safe and happy. In this article, we’ll teach you the best Yes Day rules and activities, plus how Yes Days benefit the whole family and how to ensure your family’s Yes Day goes smoothly.
Common Rules & Boundaries for Yes Days
- Make sure your children know they cannot do anything illegal or dangerous.
- Create a budget and stick to it. Let your kids know how much money they can spend.
- Set limits to how far you’re willing to travel for Yes Day activities.
- Explain that your kids' activities can't have permanent results (like getting a pet, for example).
Steps
Section 1 of 6:
Yes Day Rules
Download Article
-
1Yes Day rules vary from family to family. There are no set rules for Yes Days, as each parent, child, and family is different. While there are a few standard rules that most families choose to follow, it is up to you whether you implement them or not. Consider the needs of your family and how your children are likely to react when setting up your rules.
-
2Activities cannot be illegal or unsafe. Your family’s safety must always come first, even on fun-filled Yes Days. Explain to your kids that Yes Day activities cannot cause harm to them, you, or anyone else. As the parent, you reserve the right to determine which activities are too dangerous. [1] X Research source
- For example, if your child is allergic to peanuts but really wants a candy bar with peanuts, you can deny this request as it would hurt them.
Advertisement -
3Keep all Yes Day activities within budget. It’s entirely up to you whether or not you want to create a budget for Yes Day, but many parents agree that it’s a good idea. This way, you can still say yes to your child within reason without worrying about how you’re going to afford it. [2] X Research source
- If you want, set different budgets for different aspects of Yes Day, like a food budget, toy budget, and activity budget. This way, your child is encouraged to have fun while learning how to use their money responsibly.
-
4The Yes Day lasts no more than 24 hours. It’s called a Yes Day for a reason! Many parents set their Yes Day limits for a full 24 hours while others limit them to the hours their child is normally awake. It’s entirely up to you which version you choose, but make sure your child knows the time frame they have to work with. [3] X Research source
- For example, if you don’t want your child waking you up at 3 am to go do something, it might be a good idea to end their Yes Day at their normal bedtime.
- Most parents also agree that Yes Day activities cannot have permanent results after the day is over. For example, getting a puppy wouldn’t be allowed because you’d have to continue to care for it after Yes Day. Make sure your children understand this beforehand.
-
5Set travel limits, if necessary. Decide if all Yes Day activities must take place in your own town or city or if you’re willing to travel. If you live in a small town, it might be worth it to visit a bigger city for the day so your child has more options for activities. On the other hand, if your child is the type to ask to visit a completely different state, make sure they know their physical boundaries. [4] X Research source
-
6Consider if your child should earn their Yes Day. Arranging a Yes Day is a great way to make sure your child is on their best behavior. [5] X Trustworthy Source Centers for Disease Control and Prevention Main public health institute for the US, run by the Dept. of Health and Human Services Go to source Make sure that all homework and chores are done beforehand. Remember, though, that Yes Days aren’t necessarily meant to reward behavior and are instead a way to bond as a family, so don’t be too harsh on them.
-
7Have fun! The most important unofficial rule of Yes Days is to enjoy them. This is a day for your whole family to let go of their worries and enjoy spending time together. If the idea of setting strict rules is too stressful, don’t do it! You know what works best for your family, so plan your day accordingly.
Advertisement
Section 2 of 6:
Yes Day Activity Ideas
Download Article
-
1Visit exciting places in your area. Do some research to find fun activities and attractions near you, and let your child pick their favorites. While some of these activities cost money, there are a ton of free options as well. Your city may even have some hidden gems you didn’t know about! Here are some activities you might do for Yes Day: [6] X Research source
- Visit a museum
- Go on a short road trip
- Take a tour of the city
- Go to an arcade
- See a movie or a play
- Go to a concert
- Eat at your child’s favorite restaurant
- Go to an amusement park
- Go shopping for toys
- Visit the zoo or an aquarium
-
2Spend the day outdoors. If the weather’s nice, spending the day outside is a great way for your child to burn off some extra energy while having fun! Plus, many outdoor activities are free or cheap, so you don’t have to worry about spending a ton of money or going over budget. Here are some examples: [7] X Research source
- Go camping
- Have a picnic at the park
- Go to the beach
- Enjoy a day at the pool
- Go hiking
- Play your child’s favorite sport
- Visit different playgrounds
- Have a water balloon or water gun fight
- Draw on the sidewalk with chalk
- Play in the mud or leaves
-
3Enjoy quality time at home. If your child is more introverted or a homebody, don’t try to force them out of their comfort zone. This is a day for them to do what they want, after all, and there are a ton of fun activities you can do from the comfort of your own home. Here are some great examples: [8] X Research source
- Have a movie marathon
- Play dress up
- Bake your child’s favorite dessert
- Play board games
- Build a fort in the living room
- Play “The Floor is Lava”
- Organize a treasure hunt or scavenger hunt
- Have a pillow fight
- Make slime or do fun science experiments
- Have a dance party
Advertisement
Section 3 of 6:
Tips for Having a Successful Yes Day
Download Article
-
1Plan the date ahead of time. By choosing a specific date for your Yes Day, you’ll have more time to prepare for the day, figure out your ground rules, and save up some money. The countdown to the day will also give your kids something to look forward to. A Yes Day can be any random day you choose, or it can be a special day like your child’s birthday. [9] X Research source
- This also gives you time to think about what your kids might like to do and plan any big surprises, like a trip to an amusement park.
-
2Set clear boundaries before doing any activities. Once you’ve decided on your rules, explain them to your children as clearly as possible and answer any questions they may have. Doing this before the Yes Day begins gives your kids more time to think of appropriate requests and will hopefully prevent them from feeling confused or upset if you have to refuse one of their ideas. [10] X Trustworthy Source Child Mind Institute Nonprofit organization providing evidence-based care for children with mental health and learning disorders and their families Go to source
-
3Be open-minded. Remember, the whole point of having a Yes Day is to let your kids do things they’re excited about. Even if it’s something you’d normally turn down immediately, stop and think about why you want to say no. If it isn’t dangerous and doesn’t go against any of your Yes Day rules, why not give it a shot? [11] X Research source
- For example, let’s say your kids have never had sushi before. You know they don’t like fish and you really don’t think they’ll enjoy it, but they want to go to the new sushi restaurant for Yes Day. Sure, they may end up not liking it, which could mean wasting some money, but the experience encourages them to get out of their comfort zone and try new things.
Advertisement
Section 4 of 6:
Benefits of a Yes Day
Download Article
-
1Yes Days empower children to make their own decisions. Children often feel like they’re always being told what to do, which can make them feel like they’re not in control of their own lives. Letting them take control for a day helps validate their feelings and makes them feel heard and understood. [12] X Trustworthy Source Penn State Extension Educational organization dedicated to delivering science-based information to people, businesses, and communities Go to source
-
2Yes Days help children build communication skills. By setting rules and boundaries with your child on a Yes Day, they’re able to develop their negotiation skills. If they make a request that isn’t possible, have a conversation with them to explain why and let them come up with an alternative idea. Children must also work with their siblings to come up with an activity they’ll all enjoy, which boosts cooperation and compromise. [13] X Trustworthy Source HealthyChildren.org Health information from the American Academy of Pediatrics. Go to source
-
3They encourage children to problem solve. Kids are great at thinking outside the box, especially when given the opportunity to solve their own problems. If their chosen activity isn’t possible for whatever reason, they must think creatively to come up with another idea. This helps them develop a sense of independence and self-reliance. It may also boost self-confidence as they see how their choices can positively impact their lives. [14] X Research source
-
4A Yes Day strengthens family bonds. Spending quality time as a family supports children’s emotional and psychological well-being. Studies have shown that children with positive family relationships are more likely to have higher self-esteem and social skills. Having a Yes Day allows you to understand your child’s interests to help you get to know them on a deeper level, and both you and your child can develop a greater appreciation for each other. [15] X Research source
-
5It helps you meet your child’s attachment needs. Your child, like all humans, has a need for emotional connection and autonomy. Having a Yes Day not only gives children the freedom to make their own choices, but it shows them that you trust and respect them. This helps them feel emotionally secure. [16] X Research source
-
6Yes Days are fun and relieve stress. Yes Days aren’t just fun for the kids—they can be exciting for adults, too! Having a Yes Day allows you to leave your stress behind for 24 hours and focus on spending time with your loved ones. You’ll feel more relaxed and create wonderful memories that will last a lifetime. [17] X Trustworthy Source PubMed Central Journal archive from the U.S. National Institutes of Health Go to source
Advertisement
Section 5 of 6:
What is a yes day?
Download Article
-
A Yes Day is a day where parents say yes to their child’s requests. On a Yes Day, children are encouraged to make choices about how the family will spend their day, including which activities they participate in, what they eat, and where they go—within reason. Parents are allowed to set rules and boundaries to ensure their children are safe and don’t go overboard with their ideas. The goal is to teach children how to make their own choices and to strengthen family bonds. [18] X Research source
- The concept of Yes Days was popularized after the 2021 Jennifer Garner film Yes Day . The movie was based off of the book of the same name by Amy Krouse Rosenthal and Tom Lichtenheld.
Section 6 of 6:
Yes Day FAQs
Download Article
-
1What if my child asks to buy a lot of toys? Many parents are worried that their child will want to spend too much money, but this is rarely the case. Most of the time, children will be excited about getting to spend a whole day doing fun activities, so buying toys isn’t always the first thing on their mind. Remember, though, that you set the rules for Yes Day. Set a budget for how much they can spend or limit how many toys they’re allowed to get. [19] X Research source
-
2What if my children want to do different things? If you have more than one child, odds are, they’ll all want to do different activities. To settle this, ask each one to choose a single activity they want to do so everyone gets to do something they enjoy. Usually, kids end up enjoying activities they were originally reluctant to do and everyone has a fun time! [20] X Research source
- Or, let your children know about the Yes Day ahead of time and tell them to work together to come up with ideas they’d all enjoy. This is a great way to teach them about cooperation!
-
3What if my child wants to eat sugar all day and gets sick? Yes Days aren’t just fun—they can be a learning experience. Because children are still learning how to navigate the world, they may make some decisions that aren’t in their best interest. If you’re okay with letting your child have a ton of sugar, let them do it so they can understand the consequences and learn the importance of self-control and moderation. [21] X Research source
- Remember, though, that you make the rules. If you really don’t want your child to consume a ton of sugar, create that boundary ahead of time. If there isn’t a medical reason to prevent them from eating sugar, though, it likely won’t hurt to let them experience it for one day.
-
4What if they just want to stare at screens all day? As usual, it’s entirely up to you to decide what your kids can and cannot do on Yes Day, so feel free to limit or ban screentime. However, in most cases, children will grow bored of watching movies or playing video games and decide to do something else. They often realize it’s a waste of the Yes Day and they could do something way more fun! [22] X Research source
-
5How often should we have a Yes Day? Yes Days can happen once a month, every few months, once a year, or whatever works best for your family. Just be sure to plan ahead of time so everything runs smoothly, and remember that if Yes Days happen too frequently, your child might lose some of their excitement.
Advertisement
Expert Q&A
Ask a Question
200 characters left
Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered.
Submit
Advertisement
Video
Tips
- While it’s helpful for parents to plan Yes Days in advance, try surprising your kids by not telling them until the day of!Thanks
Submit a Tip
All tip submissions are carefully reviewed before being published
Name
Please provide your name and last initial
Thanks for submitting a tip for review!
Advertisement
You Might Also Like
8 Common Family Structures in Modern-Day Society
How to
Put a Friend or Relative out of Your House
80+ Funny, Heartfelt, & Unique Birthday Messages for Your Sister-in-Law
Signs Your Family Doesn’t Care For You as They Should & How to Deal With It
What to Know About Practicing Naturism with Your Children
How to
Disown Your Family
7 Comforting Things to Say to Family When Someone Is Dying
Get Closer with Your Cousins: Gaining Trust, Building Relationships & More
Can You Move Out at 16? Here's What You Need to Know
7 Reasons You Feel Irritable Around Your Family & How To Cope
What to Do When Your Mom Says Hurtful Things: How to React
What is an Auntie in Indian Culture?
14 House Rules for Teenagers & Young Adults Living at Home
How to
Cut Off Family Members Who Hurt You & Move On With Your Life
Advertisement
References
- ↑ https://www.firstfiveyears.org.au/child-development/parenting-trends-what-is-a-yes-day
- ↑ https://www.firstfiveyears.org.au/child-development/parenting-trends-what-is-a-yes-day
- ↑ https://www.championyourparenting.com/make-yes-day-a-new-family-tradition/
- ↑ https://thefergusonjournal.com/why-you-should-do-a-yes-day-with-your-kids/
- ↑ https://www.cdc.gov/parents/essentials/toddlersandpreschoolers/consequences/rewards.html
- ↑ https://www.championyourparenting.com/make-yes-day-a-new-family-tradition/
- ↑ https://www.championyourparenting.com/make-yes-day-a-new-family-tradition/
- ↑ https://www.cnn.com/2018/01/11/health/yes-day-strauss/index.html
- ↑ https://raisingfamilies.org/fbc/yes-day-for-siblings/
- ↑ https://childmind.org/article/teaching-kids-boundaries-empathy/
- ↑ https://www.authentichappiness.sas.upenn.edu/newsletters/authentichappinesscoaching/open-mindedness
- ↑ https://extension.psu.edu/programs/betterkidcare/early-care/tip-pages/all/giving-children-choices
- ↑ https://www.healthychildren.org/English/family-life/family-dynamics/communication-discipline/Pages/Components-of-Good-Communication.aspx
- ↑ https://www.rasmussen.edu/degrees/education/blog/problem-solving-for-preschoolers/
- ↑ https://child.unl.edu/family-relationships
- ↑ https://www.umt.edu/ccfwd/resource_library/mental-and-behavioral-health/mbh_emotion.php
- ↑ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5954612/
- ↑ https://www.firstfiveyears.org.au/child-development/parenting-trends-what-is-a-yes-day
- ↑ https://thefergusonjournal.com/why-you-should-do-a-yes-day-with-your-kids/
- ↑ https://raisingfamilies.org/fbc/yes-day-for-siblings/
- ↑ https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/self-control.html
- ↑ https://thefergusonjournal.com/why-you-should-do-a-yes-day-with-your-kids/
About This Article
This article was co-authored by Wits End Parenting
and by wikiHow staff writer, Raven Minyard, BA
. Wits End Parenting is a parent-coaching practice based in Berkeley, California specializing in strong-willed, “spirited” children with impulsivity, emotional volatility, difficulty “listening,” defiance, and aggression. Wits End Parenting's counselors incorporate positive discipline that is tailored to each child’s temperament while also providing long-term results, freeing parents from the need to continually re-invent their discipline strategies. This article has been viewed 2,133 times.
1 votes - 100%
Co-authors: 3
Updated: June 19, 2024
Views: 2,133
Categories: Family Life
Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 2,133 times.
Did this article help you?
Advertisement
Co-authors: 3
Updated: June 19, 2024
Views: 2,133
100%
of readers found this article helpful
.
1 votes - 100%
Click a star to add your vote
% of people told us that this article helped them.
Quizzes
Do I Have a Dirty Mind Quiz
Take Quiz
Am I a Good Kisser Quiz
Take Quiz
Rizz Game: Test Your Rizz
Take Quiz
What's Your Red Flag Quiz
Take Quiz
Am I Smart Quiz
Take Quiz
How Insecure Am I Quiz
Take Quiz
You Might Also Like
8 Common Family Structures in Modern-Day Society
How to
Put a Friend or Relative out of Your House
80+ Funny, Heartfelt, & Unique Birthday Messages for Your Sister-in-Law
Signs Your Family Doesn’t Care For You as They Should & How to Deal With It
Featured Articles
How to
Make Your Android Screen Black and White or Grayscale
How to
Study a Week Before an Exam
How to
Stop Taking Things Personally
13 Signs Your Friends with Benefits Is Falling For You
How to
Love an Overthinker
Do I Have Rizz Quiz
Trending Articles
How to
Work on Yourself: 11 Essential Tips for Self-Improvement
How to
Keep Your Dog Happy
400+ Cute, Cool, & Unique Name Ideas for Cows & Bulls
Can Enemies Become Friends? How to Mend Your Relationship
How to
Make Soft Drinks
Which Emojis Represent Taylor Swift? A Guide for Swifties
Featured Articles
How to
Improve Your Personality
How to
Force Yourself to Seriously Study
11 Ways to Confuse and Disarm a Narcissist
"Hot to Go!" by Chappell Roan: The Flirtatious Lyrics & Their Meaning
How to
Dress for Fall
What Human Emotion Am I Quiz
Featured Articles
How Strong Is Your Intuition Quiz
People with Big Eyes: What Are They Like, and Are They More Attractive?
50 First Date Conversation Starters to Spark a Connection
118 Cute, Flirty, and Romantic Good Night Texts to Copy and Paste
How to
Achieve the Messy Fringe Look
21 Common Hand Signs & Gestures (& What They Mean)
Watch Articles
How to
Remove a Toothpaste Stain
How to
Make Couscous
How to
Properly Take Off a Face Mask
How to
Know when Oat Milk Is Bad
How to
Blow Dry Bangs
How to
Prepare a Pop Tart
Trending Articles
13 Striking, Masculine Flowers That Men Will Love
How to
Overcome Your Fear of Roller Coasters
How to
Find Scholarships, Plus When & How to Apply
Ticketmaster Thinks I'm a Bot: 6 Reasons & Fast Fixes
How to
Stop Being Sad
How to
Permanently Delete an X (Formerly Twitter) Account
Quizzes
What Disney Princess Am I Quiz
Take Quiz
Do I Have a Phobia Quiz
Take Quiz
Guess My Age Quiz
Take Quiz
Am I a Genius Quiz
Take Quiz
Depression Test
Take Quiz
What Human Emotion Am I Quiz
Take Quiz
