Q&A for How to Deal With a Friend Who Constantly Blows You Off

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How do you tell if a friend is gaslighting you?

Tala Johartchi, PsyD
Clinical Psychologist
Dr. Tala Johartchi is a Clinical Psychologist based in the Los Angeles, California metro area. With expertise and advanced training in Evidence-Based Practices and therapeutic/behavioral frameworks, Dr. Johartchi specializes in working with individuals, couples, and families experiencing Substance Disorders, Love Addiction and Codependency, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, as well as common co-occurring disorders such as Depression, Anxiety, and Relational/Attachment difficulties. She earned an MA and PsyD in Clinical Psychology from The American School of Professional Psychology at Argosy University, San Francisco.

Tala Johartchi, PsyD

Clinical Psychologist

Expert Answer

Think about how they treat you in conversations. A gaslighting friend will try to deflect blame and make you question your sense of reality. Let's say you confront a friend about how often they cancel plans—a gaslighting friend might twist the situation and make you feel like you're perceiving things incorrectly.

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Question

What do I do if my best friend keeps blowing me off when I know they don't have any other plans or anything better to do?

Community Answer

Confront them about it. Maybe they are going through something right now. It's best to communicate how you are feeling with your best friend.

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Question

My friend doesn't listen to me, and loves irritating, annoying and laughing at me deliberately, when when I tell her I don't like this. What do I do?

Community Answer

Directly confront her and ask her why she's doing this. If she doesn't respect your feelings and change her behavior, end this friendship.

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What do I do if a friend acts like she is interested, but then doesn't respond or put in any effort when I try to plan something?

Community Answer

Try not planning anything for a few weeks and see if she asks to hang out. If she doesn't, she is probably not a great friend.

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