What Does It Mean to Be a Hopeless Romantic? 10 Signs to Look Out For

PDF download Download Article
Plus, advice on how to thrive as a hopeless romantic
PDF download Download Article

Do you believe in true love, soulmates, and fairy tale endings? If so, you might just be a hopeless romantic! If you’re looking for more information on what this means, you’ve come to the right place. We’ll explain what a hopeless romantic is and go over common signs that you might be one. We’ll also provide advice on how to thrive as a hopeless romantic, so keep reading!

Hopeless Romantic Meaning

A hopeless romantic is someone who has an overly optimistic view of love. They believe in soulmates and love at first sight, and they long to experience a fairy tale romance. Because hopeless romantics idealize love so much, they may ignore red flags in potential partners or develop an unrealistic view of relationships.

Section 1 of 5:

What is a hopeless romantic?

PDF download Download Article
  1. These sensitive, sentimental people believe in love at first sight and fairy tale endings. They long to experience a cinematic, epic love story, and they’re constantly searching for “The One.” Due to their idealism, hopeless romantics may develop an unrealistic view of relationships, and they tend to ignore red flags in potential partners. [1]
    • For example, a hopeless romantic might meet someone and immediately get swept up in a whirlwind romance, without waiting to see if they’re actually compatible with this person.
      • In a matter of weeks, the hopeless romantic may believe that they’ve found their soulmate, and that the two of them are destined to be together.
    • On the other hand, someone who is not a hopeless romantic would likely take a more cautious approach and move at a slower pace when dating someone new.
      • This might involve taking a few months to get to know the other person before taking major steps like saying “I love you” or becoming “official.”
    2. Advertisement
Section 2 of 5:

10 Signs That You’re a Hopeless Romantic

PDF download Download Article
  1. Hopeless romantics have an incredibly optimistic attitude toward romance. They genuinely believe in soulmates and destiny. [2] Even when they experience setbacks and heartbreaks, they remain hopeful that they’ll find “The One” and live happily ever after. If you tend to view love through this dreamy, idealistic lens, there’s a good chance you’re a hopeless romantic. [3]
  2. Hopeless romantics love to visualize the perfect, fairy tale future they’re longing for. If you’ve spent hours daydreaming about your wedding, imagining every detail from the bouquet to the dress to the decor, this is definitely a sign that you’re a hopeless romantic. [4]
    • For example, hopeless romantics likely have Pinterest boards filled with wedding inspo, and they may enjoy browsing engagement rings online, even when they aren’t in a relationship with someone.
  3. Hopeless romantics tend to be obsessed with media about love. Their favorite movies are swoon-worthy romances like The Notebook or adorable rom-coms like When Harry Met Sally , and they enjoy reading romance novels like the Bridgerton series and Pride and Prejudice . If this sounds like you, there’s a very good chance you have some hopeless romantic tendencies! [5]
    • You'll often find hopeless romantics listening to love songs. These may include older classics like Whitney Houston’s “I Will Always Love You,” or newer hits like Taylor Swift’s “Lover.”
  4. If you believe in love at first sight and get super invested in new relationships right away, you might be a hopeless romantic. Driven by their belief in destiny and fairytale endings, hopeless romantics start idealizing about marriage and a future with someone almost immediately. [6]
    • For example, a hopeless romantic may feel ready to become “official” after only a few dates.
    • They may even hit major milestones like saying “I love you” or wanting to move in with someone in just a few short weeks or months.
  5. Hopeless romantics may create a fantasy version of their partner in their mind, rather than seeing them for who they truly are. [7] Unfortunately, this idealized view may cause the hopeless romantic to only pay attention to their partner’s positive traits and ignore red flags. This often leads to relationship difficulties down the road. [8]
    • For instance, a hopeless romantic may focus on how attractive the other person is, or how much physical chemistry there is, even if this person is a terrible match for them.
    • The partner could be unfaithful, unkind, or completely incompatible with them, but it wouldn’t matter. The hopeless romantic excuses these faults, claiming that true love will conquer all.
  6. Hopeless romantics tend to prioritize love and romance over other areas of their life. [9] As a result, they may devote all their time and energy to their partner, putting their friends, family, hobbies, and professional life on the back burner. If you tend to lose yourself in your romances, this could be a sign that you’re a hopeless romantic.
  7. Because hopeless romantics are so desperate to experience true love, they tend to do everything they can to make their relationships work, even if this means putting their own needs aside. [10] If you find yourself consistently putting in more effort than your partner and compromising on your needs in relationships, you may be a hopeless romantic. [11]
    • For example, if a hopeless romantic feels their partner withdrawing or becoming more distant, they may take on the full responsibility of trying to reignite the spark in their relationship.
    • The hopeless romantic might do all kinds of romantic gestures for their partner and obsess over ways to improve the connection, emotionally exhausting themselves in the process.
  8. Hopeless romantics dream of long-lasting relationships, but their idealized view of love often has the opposite effect. When a relationship inevitably falls short of the fairy tale vision they’ve created, the hopeless romantic may take this as a sign that their partner isn’t actually their one true love. They then jump ship in order to search for their “real” soulmate, rather than sticking it out and working through things. [12]
    • As a result, hopeless romantics may have a string of intense but brief relationships in their dating history.
    • As soon as they break-up with one person, they find themselves in love with someone else.
    • When this happens, they assure themselves that they’ve found “The One” this time, but then the whole cycle repeats itself.
  9. If you often find yourself desperately pining after a crush who doesn’t feel the same way, you could be a hopeless romantic. Hopeless romantics tend to develop feelings for people very quickly, even when they haven’t had a chance to get to know this person and truly connect with them. As a result, hopeless romantics are more likely to fall head-over-heels for someone who doesn’t reciprocate. [13]
  10. Hopeless romantics often have a hard time being single. They view romantic love as the center of their universe, so they feel incomplete and unhappy when they aren’t in a relationship. [14] If you feel an intense need to get into a new relationship immediately after you go through a break-up, this is definitely a sign that you’re a hopeless romantic.
    11. Advertisement
Section 3 of 5:

Is Being a Hopeless Romantic Good or Bad?

PDF download Download Article
  1. A hopeless romantic is someone who has an incredibly optimistic view of love. This optimism can be a beautiful thing because it allows you to be vulnerable and open yourself up to the possibility of romance. However, if this optimism tips over into unbridled idealism and unrealistic expectations, it can present some difficulties. [15]
    • These difficulties include an inability to see red flags in a relationship, trouble with working through conflict, and lack of healthy boundaries.
    • The intense idealism of hopeless romantics can also make their relationships more one-dimensional and shallow, since they’re focusing on a fantasy version of their partner, rather than truly getting to know them. [16]
    • There are a few steps a hopeless romantic can take to develop a healthier and more balanced view of love, and we’ll cover them below.
Section 4 of 5:

How to Thrive as a Hopeless Romantic

PDF download Download Article
  1. The ability to be happy and single is one of the most valuable skills a hopeless romantic can develop. When you’re comfortable with life as a single person, you won’t feel pressured to rush into a new romantic relationship before you’re ready. Instead, you’ll be able to work on yourself, figure out what you truly desire in a partnership, and hold out until you find the right match for you. [17] Here are some tips for enjoying single life:
    • Take this time to get to know yourself better . You may find it helpful to journal about your thoughts, feelings, and desires.
    • Remind yourself of the positive sides of being single. For example, single people have more time to pursue their hobbies and connect with family and friends.
    • Make self-care a priority . This may mean spending time in nature, getting enough exercise, doing the things you love, and setting aside time in your schedule for relaxation.
    • Take a break from romantic media. Watching rom-coms or scrolling through social media posts of happy couples may reinforce the idea that you need a partner to be happy. Try avoiding these things for a while. [18]
  2. If you’re a hopeless romantic, you likely have a distorted view of what a relationship looks like. You may imagine the perfect romances you’ve seen in movies, rather than appreciating the beauty of a real partnership. Letting go of these idealized notions can be very freeing, and it also helps you build a deep, meaningful connection with a partner. [19] Here’s some info on what a healthy relationship looks like:
    • You respect each other’s privacy, space, and boundaries.
    • You encourage each other to spend time with friends and family members.
    • You celebrate each other’s individuality and maintain your interests and hobbies outside the relationship.
    • You feel comfortable expressing your emotions, thoughts, and opinions to each other.
    • You aren’t afraid of respectfully disagreeing.
    • You work through conflict with patience and love.
    • You feel physically and emotionally safe in your partner’s presence. [20]
  3. If you’re a hopeless romantic, you may give too much of yourself in relationships and ignore your own needs. You may also end up neglecting other important relationships in your life in order to spend all your time with your partner. To avoid these things, work on setting healthy boundaries with your partner, [21]
    • This may mean setting aside time in your schedule to pursue your individual interests, or making it a priority to see your friends and family on a regular basis. [22]
  4. Being a hopeless romantic is not a mental health condition. [23] It’s important to note, however, that some hopeless romantics may struggle with things like codependency or enmeshment. Falling in love too quickly may also be a sign of anxious attachment style or borderline personality disorder. [24] If you’re a hopeless romantic who deals with any of these things, a licensed therapist or counselor can help.
    • Ask a trusted friend or family member for a referral if they work with a therapist, or check out online directories to choose the right therapist for you. [25]
    5. Advertisement
Section 5 of 5:

Key Takeaways for Hopeless Romantics

PDF download Download Article
  1. Although there are a few important pitfalls to watch out for if you’re a hopeless romantic, your sensitivity, positivity, and caring heart are definitely attributes. And, if you focus on approaching relationships with a little bit more caution and practicality, there’s no doubt you can find your perfect match and experience a love for the ages!

Expert Q&A

Ask a Question
200 characters left
Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered.
Submit
      Advertisement

      Tips

      Submit a Tip
      All tip submissions are carefully reviewed before being published
      Name
      Please provide your name and last initial
      Submit
      Thanks for submitting a tip for review!
      Advertisement

      You Might Also Like

      How to
      Impress a Girl with Words
      25 Ways To Know a Man Loves You Even if He Doesn’t Say It
      How to
      Know if a Girl Likes You Secretly
      20 Qualities Men Adore in Women (And Why They Love Them)
      Signs from the Universe That You Should Definitely Be with Someone
      8 Reasons You're Sleepy Around Your Partner
      The 7 New Love Languages Explained
      What Are the Signs That a Girl Isn’t Into You?
      What Is the Three Loves Theory?
      How to
      Make a Cancer Man Miss You
      Top 6 Zodiac Signs: Who’s the Best Kisser?
      20 Signs You’re Not in Love Anymore
      216 Cute Love Quotes & Romantic Lines for Him
      How to
      Stop Being in Love With a Person You'll Never Meet
      Advertisement

      References

      1. ↑ https://psychcentral.com/relationships/hopeless-romantic
      2. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-myths-of-sex/202404/how-to-be-a-hopeful-instead-of-hopeless-romantic
      3. ↑ https://psychcentral.com/relationships/hopeless-romantic
      4. ↑ https://psychcentral.com/relationships/hopeless-romantic
      5. ↑ https://www.scienceofpeople.com/hopeless-romantic/
      6. ↑ https://psychcentral.com/relationships/hopeless-romantic
      7. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-myths-of-sex/202404/how-to-be-a-hopeful-instead-of-hopeless-romantic
      8. ↑ https://psychcentral.com/relationships/hopeless-romantic
      9. ↑ https://psychcentral.com/relationships/hopeless-romantic
      1. ↑ https://www.marriage.com/advice/romance/what-defines-a-hopeless-romantic
      2. ↑ https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/love/romantic-love-understanding-what-hopelessly-in-love-means/
      3. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-myths-of-sex/202404/how-to-be-a-hopeful-instead-of-hopeless-romantic
      4. ↑ https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/love/romantic-love-understanding-what-hopelessly-in-love-means/
      5. ↑ https://psychcentral.com/relationships/hopeless-romantic
      6. ↑ https://psychcentral.com/relationships/hopeless-romantic
      7. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/life-in-transition/202112/why-people-idealize-others-in-relationships
      8. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/a-funny-bone-to-pick/202402/14-benefits-of-being-single
      9. ↑ https://health.clevelandclinic.org/how-to-be-ok-with-being-single
      10. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/life-in-transition/202112/why-people-idealize-others-in-relationships
      11. ↑ https://www.ny.gov/teen-dating-violence-awareness-and-prevention/what-does-healthy-relationship-look
      12. ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships-communication/setting-healthy-boundaries-in-relationships.htm
      13. ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships-communication/setting-healthy-boundaries-in-relationships.htm
      14. ↑ https://psychcentral.com/relationships/hopeless-romantic .
      15. ↑ https://psychcentral.com/relationships/how-long-does-it-take-to-fall-in-love#why-does-someone-love-too-much-too-soon
      16. ↑ https://www.apa.org/ptsd-guideline/patients-and-families/finding-good-therapist
      17. ↑ https://psychcentral.com/relationships/hopeless-romantic

      About This Article

      Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 3,377 times.

      Did this article help you?

      Advertisement