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Get the giggles going with these kid-friendly school jokes
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Cracking a joke about school is a great way to keep kids engaged and bring joy and laughter into the classroom. In this article, we’re providing the ultimate list of school jokes about teachers, students, supplies, and more that are safe for all ages. Whether you’re a teacher, parent, or child looking for a laugh, read on for the most clean and kid-friendly school jokes!

Hilarious School Jokes & Puns for Kids

  • What do elves learn in school? The elf-abet.
  • What’s a math teacher’s favorite dessert? Pi.
  • Where do pencils go on vacation? Pencil-vania.
  • How do bees get to school? On the school buzz.
  • Why was the broom late for school? He over-swept.
  • What’s the blackboard’s favorite drink? Hot chalk-olate.
  • What does a thesaurus eat for breakfast? A synonym roll.
Section 1 of 8:

Funny Kid Jokes About School

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  1. Telling a school joke is a great way to break the ice when starting class, introducing a new topic, or keeping students happy and engaged. Here are some funny jokes about homework, lunchtime, school supplies, and more to make a child smile:
    • How do you get straight A’s? By using a ruler.
    • Where do pencils go on vacation? Pencil-vania.
    • Which building has the most stories? The library.
    • What are the coolest letters of the alphabet? AC.
    • What did the paper say to the pencil? “Write on!”
    • Where do surfers go to school? Boarding school.
    • What’s the most tired school supply? A knapsack.
    • What do you need to go to high school? A ladder.
    • What does your computer do for lunch? Has a byte.
    • Which letter holds the most amount of water? The C.
    • What do you call a school for ice cream? Sundae school.
    • Why was the notebook so popular? It had all the right lines.
    • When is a blue book not blue anymore? When it’s been red!
    • What’s the eraser’s life motto? “Everybody makes mistakes!”
    • Why did the bikes get detention at school? They spoke too much.
    • Where do kids in New York learn multiplication tables? Times Square.
    • Why did the egg get thrown out of class? Because it kept telling yolks.
    • What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? “Supplies!”
    • What’s black when it’s clean and white when it’s dirty? The blackboard. [1]
    • Why do magicians do so well in school? They’re great with trick questions.
    • What did the highlighter say to the textbook? “I’ll bring out the best in you.”
    • Why did the stapler break up with the pencil? It felt like it was too attached.
    • Do you know why every book in the library is the same color? They’re all red.
    • Why did the paintbrush go to art class alone? It wanted to brush up on its skills.
    • Why do fireflies get bad grades at school? Because they are not bright enough.
    • What musical instrument was found in the school bathroom? A tuba toothpaste.
    • What did one pencil say to the other on the first day of school? “Looking sharp!”
    • Why did the girl do her homework on an airplane? To achieve a higher education.
    • What did the pencil say to the sharpener? “Stop going around in circles with me!”
    • Why did the quarterback take the hardest class? Because he knew he would pass.
    • Why did the farmer’s son study medicine? Because he wanted to go into a different field.
    • Why didn’t anyone want to eat next to the basketball team? Because they dribble too much.
    • Why did the student throw their watch out of the school window? They wanted to see time fly. [2]
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Section 2 of 8:

Short Jokes

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  1. Tell a short and silly joke to get students rolling with laughter. If you’re looking for a quick joke that packs a punch, experiment with silly puns and wordplay. Here are some simple and effective school jokes to share with kids:
    • Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, 8, 9! [3]
    • What do elves learn in school? The elf-abet.
    • Where do pencils come from? Pennsylvania.
    • What school is the friendliest one? A “hi” school!
    • Why was the broom late for school? He over-swept.
    • What does a book do in the winter? Puts on a jacket.
    • What is a witch’s favorite subject in school? Spelling.
    • Which school supply is king of the classroom? A ruler.
    • Which room can a student never enter? A mushroom!
    • What’s the blackboard’s favorite drink? Hot chalk-olate.
    • What does a thesaurus eat for breakfast? A synonym roll.
    • What did the paper say to the pen? “You have a good point.”
    • Why isn’t there a clock in the library? Because it tocks too much.
    • What’s the best place to grow flowers in school? In kindergarden.
    • What do kids do during recess on rainy days? Play bored games.
    • Why can’t pirates learn the alphabet? They keep getting lost at C.
    • Why did the glue get in trouble at school? It couldn’t stick to the rules.
    • What’s the name of the superhero in computer class? The Screen Saver!
    • Why did the soccer ball go to school? Because it wanted to be kicked into shape!
    • Why did the M&M want to go back to school? Because they wanted to become a Smartie.
    • Why did the student eat their homework? Because their teacher said it was a piece of cake. [4]
Section 3 of 8:

Teacher & Principal Jokes

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  1. Lighten the mood with these hilarious jokes about school staff. Studies show that sharing a laugh is one of the best ways to bring people together and build community. [5] If you’re trying to create a close environment in the classroom or make children feel more comfortable around you, here are some silly jokes to leave students in stitches:
    • What is a math teacher’s favorite season? Sum-mer.
    • What’s an English teacher’s favorite tree? A poe-tree.
    • Who is everyone’s best friend at school? The princi-pal.
    • Where did the music teacher leave her keys? In the piano!
    • Why do music teachers need a ladder? To reach the high notes.
    • Why did the principal start a gardening club? To help students grow.
    • What do librarians take with them when they go fishing? Bookworms. [6]
    • What are 10 things that teachers can always count on? Their fingers.
    • How is an English teacher like a judge? They both give out sentences.
    • Why did the teacher jump into the pool? They wanted to test the water.
    • Why were the teacher’s eyes crossed? They couldn’t control their pupils.
    • What did the music teacher say to their class? “Let’s find harmony in learning!”
    • Why did the teacher wear a helmet to class? They were teaching “crash” courses.
    • Why did the clock go to the principal’s office? Because it was always running late.
    • Why are music teachers good baseball players? Because they have a perfect pitch.
    • What do you do if a teacher rolls their eyes at you? Pick them up and roll them back!
    • Why did the teacher wear sunglasses to school? Because their students were so bright!
    • Why did the teacher draw on the window? Because they wanted their lesson to be clear.
    • How did the music teacher get locked out of their classroom? Their keys were on the piano.
    • Why did the teacher bring a broom to class? They wanted to sweep thorough the lesson.
    • What did the ghost teacher say to the class? “Look at the board and I will go through it again.”
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Section 4 of 8:

Math Jokes

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  1. Some students view math as a hard and boring subject, but cracking a joke can be the perfect way to change their perspective. Here are some math jokes and puns that always add up to a good time:
    • What’s a math teacher’s favorite dessert? Pi. [7]
    • Why is 2+2=5 like your left foot? It’s not right.
    • What do baby parabolas drink? Quadratic formula.
    • What’s a butterfly’s favorite subject? Moth-ematics.
    • What is a math teacher’s favorite snake? A pi-thon.
    • Why was the math book sad? It had a lot of problems. [8]
    • What makes a circle overqualified? It has 360 degrees!
    • What do you call best friends who love math? Alge-bros.
    • What did the triangle say to the circle? “You’re pointless.”
    • Which tree is the math teacher’s favorite? The geome-tree.
    • Are monsters good at math? Not unless you Count Dracula.
    • Which U.S. state has the most math teachers? Mathachusetts!
    • Why do plants hate math? Because it gives them square roots.
    • How do you make seven an even number? By removing the “s.”
    • What do you call a number that can’t sit still? A roamin’ numeral.
    • Why didn’t the two 4’s want any dinner? Because they already 8!
    • What was the math teacher’s favorite winter activity? Figure skating.
    • Why did the square and the triangle go to the gym? To stay in shape.
    • Why don’t parallel lines ever get together? Because they never meet.
    • What’s a math teacher’s favorite vacation destination? Times Square.
    • Why is the obtuse angle always upset? Because it can never be right.
    • Why do we measure a snake in inches? Because it doesn’t have feet.
    • Where do math lovers go on tropical vacation? The Bermuda Triangle.
    • Why do calculators make great friends? You can always count on them.
    • How do you warm up a cold room? You go to the corner—it’s always 90 degrees!
    • Why did the cow become a math teacher? Because it was great at moo-ltiplication!
    • Why did the student do multiplication problems on the floor? Because the teacher said not to use tablets.
    • What do you get when you divide the circumference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter? Pumpkin pi!
    • Why was the equal sign so humble? Because it knew it wasn’t less than or greater than anyone else.
Section 5 of 8:

Science & Technology Jokes

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  1. Share a science or technology-related joke to brighten up the day. Kids are naturally curious about the world around them, and science and technology allows them to think outside of the box and be creative. Here are some engaging jokes about nature, space, chemistry, and technology that are out-of-this-world awesome:
    • When do astronauts eat? At launch time.
    • What kind of hair do oceans have? Wavy hair. [9]
    • What holds the sun up in the sky? Sunbeams.
    • What do astronauts love to read? Comet books.
    • What’s a biologist’s favorite clothing item? Genes.
    • How do astronauts organize a party? They planet.
    • What’s a tornado’s favorite game to play? Twister!
    • How do you cut the ocean in half? With a sea-saw.
    • What kind of tree can fit in your hand? A palm tree.
    • What do you call a biologist’s self-portrait? A cell-fie.
    • When do student astronauts eat? During launch time.
    • Why did the computer go to the doctor? It had a virus.
    • Why is the ocean so salty? Because the land never waves back.
    • Why did the germ cross the microscope? To get to the other slide.
    • How does a science teacher freshen her breath? With experi-mints!
    • What do you call an acid with an attitude problem? A-Mean-Oh-Acid.
    • How did the astronaut serve dinner in outer space? On flying saucers.
    • What do you call a bunch of iron atoms at a carnival? A ferrous wheel.
    • What did the limestone say to the geologist? “Don’t take me for granite!”
    • Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road? Because he didn’t have the guts.
    • Why didn’t the sun go to college? Because it already had a million degrees.
    • Why don’t science teachers trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
    • Why are chemists so great at solving problems? They have all the solutions.
    • What did the DNA say to the other DNA? Do these genes make me look fat?
    • How did the student feel when they learned about electricity? Totally shocked.
    • Why did the scientist remove their doorbell? They wanted to win the no-bell prize.
    • How do you know that Saturn was married more than once? Because it has multiple rings.
    • Why did the computer scientist catch a cold? Because there were too many windows open.
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Section 6 of 8:

History Jokes

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  1. Create an engaging learning environment with a history-related joke. Looking for a hilarious history joke to help kids remember new information? These jokes provide all the lessons and LOLs you need, and are perfect for all ages:
    • Who invented fractions? Henry the 1/8th! [10]
    • Who made King Arthur’s round table? Sir-Cumference.
    • What is a snake’s favorite subject in school? Hisssstory.
    • What kind of music did the pilgrims like? Plymouth Rock!
    • Why was World War II so slow? Because they were Stalin.
    • Why is history like a fruit cake? Because it has many dates.
    • How did the Vikings send secret messages? By Norse code!
    • What’s purple and 5,000 miles long? The grape wall of China.
    • How was the Roman Empire cut in half? With a pair of Caesars.
    • Where was the Declaration of Independence signed? At the bottom!
    • What’s the fruitiest subject at school? History, because it’s full of dates!
    • What did Caesar say to Cleopatra? “Toga-ether we can rule the world!”
    • How did the pharaoh feel after a long day of ruling? Tut-erly exhausted!
    • What did they do at the Boston Tea Party? I don’t know, I wasn’t invited!
    • How did Benjamin Franklin feel when he discovered electricity? Shocked.
    • How did Louis XIV feel after completing the Palace of Versailles? Baroque.
    • Why did the ancient Egyptians need a doctor? They had sar-cough-aguses.
    • Why did the knight always carry a pen and paper? He wanted to draw his sword.
    • Why did Karl Marx dislike drinking Earl Grey with his breakfast? Because proper tea is theft.
    • What do Alexander the Great and Kermit the Frog have in common? The same middle name.
    • Why were the early days of history called the dark ages? Because there were so many knights!
    • Why did the pioneers cross the country in covered wagons? Because they didn’t want to wait 40 years for a train!
Section 7 of 8:

Geography Jokes

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  1. Reference cities, countries, or physical geography for loads of laughter. If you want to get the giggles going, these geography-themed jokes are where it’s at! Refer to the globe, environment, maps, and more to keep the joy of learning alive:
    • How do mountains see? They peak! [11]
    • What did Delaware? Her New Jersey!
    • What city always cheats on exams? Peking!
    • Where do crayons go on vacation? Color-ado.
    • What’s the coldest country in the world? Chile.
    • What’s a pirate’s favorite country? Arrr-gentina.
    • Which state has the most streets? Rhode Island.
    • What is the fastest country in the world? Rush-a!
    • Which country’s citizens have the nicest teeth? Brussia!
    • What stays in the corner but travels around the world? A stamp.
    • What did one glacier say to the other glacier? “Ice to meet you.”
    • What do you call the little rivers that flow into the Nile? Juveniles.
    • What rock group has four men that don’t sing? Mount Rushmore!
    • What has 5 eyes and is lying on the water? The Mississippi River.
    • Why don’t mountains get cold in the winter? They wear snow caps.
    • How did the mountain tell the time? It used mountain standard time.
    • What’s the smartest state? Alabama, because it has four A’s and one B.
    • Why did the Romanian stop reading at night? They were given Bucharest.
    • Why are mountains the funniest place to travel? Because they’re hill areas.
    • Why do paper maps never win poker tournaments? Because they always fold.
    • What’s the best thing about Switzerland? I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus!
    • What was Thor’s favorite thing about geography? Learning about the equa-thor!
    • How did the scarecrow become a successful geography teacher? He was outstanding in his field.
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Section 8 of 8:

School Jokes About Animals

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  1. Cute, adorable, and absolutely hilarious, animals make the perfect punch line for a variety of jokes. If you know a child who is obsessed with animals, these jokes are sure to bring a smile to their face:
    • What’s a frog’s favorite year? A leap year.
    • What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
    • Which animal cheats on exams? A cheat-ah.
    • What did the buffalo say at drop-off? “Bi-son!”
    • What do whales eat for lunch? Fish and ships.
    • How do bees get to school? On the school buzz.
    • What’s a bird’s favorite type of math? Owl-gebra.
    • How do fish get to school? They take the octo-bus!
    • Why are fish so smart? Because they live in schools. [12]
    • What dinosaur had the best vocabulary? The thesaurus.
    • What do you call a duck that gets all A’s? A wise quaker.
    • What contest do skunks win at school? The smelling bee!
    • What does a spider do on the internet? Create a web-site.
    • What time would it be if Godzilla came to school? Time to run!
    • What creature is smarter than a talking parrot? A spelling bee.
    • Where do sheep go for a tropical vacation? The Baa-Haa-Mas.
    • What does a duck use to solve math problems? A quack-u-lator.
    • Why did the dog fail art class? It could only draw “ruff” sketches.
    • Why did the frog take the bus to work today? His car got toad away.
    • Why did the elephant miss the last day of school? He was ill-i-phant.
    • What do you call an alligator who solves mysteries? An investi-gator.
    • Why did the dog do so well in school? Because they were the teacher’s pet.
    • Why was the fish late to school? Because they was fin-ishing their homework!
    • Why did the cat go to school? Because they wanted to improve their purrr-formance!
    • Why did the duck get sent to the principal’s office? Because it was always quacking jokes in class!

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