How to Pretend to be Working at Work

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Pretending to get your work done can be a risky and difficult proposition. If you fail to turn in an important assignment, you could be reprimanded, demoted, or even fired. If you’re careful though, you can avoid work while tricking those around you into thinking that you’re a productive employee. All you have to do is look busy and overwhelmed, use technology to make people think that you’re working, and avoid coworkers and supervisors as often as you can.

Method 1
Method 1 of 3:

Looking Busy

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  1. You’re going to look lazy if you’re sitting down and casually hanging out at your desk all day. But if people see you busily hustle back and forth, you’ll look like you’re struggling hard to meet deadlines. About once every hour or so, take a brisk walk around the office with a pile of papers in your hands. Visit other departments to ask questions instead of emailing them. [1]
    • If anyone tries to stop you to talk, apologize and say that you’re “in the middle of something.”
    • It’s hard for a boss or supervisor to justify stopping an employee that’s hustling back and forth, even if they don’t know what they’re working on.
  2. A messy desk creates the impression that you’re jumping back and forth between a lot of different tasks. Leave a pile of papers stacked on an edge of your desk, and don’t pour out your cup of coffee after it cools. Keep a calculator, pile of pens, or notecards spread out on your desk. [2]
    • Make sure that your work computer never goes to sleep by clicking randomly on the screen once every 10-15 minutes.
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  3. If you sigh, grimace, and rub your forehead a lot, you’ll appear stressed and overwhelmed by your work. If supervisors think that you’ve already got a full plate in front of you, they’ll avoid assigning you additional work. This will mean that you’ll be able to control how much work you’re assigned and avoid taking on any new responsibilities. [3]
    • If you act like you’re stressed but everyone knows you have nothing to do, your coworkers may start asking questions. Keep the acting light during slow periods at work.
  4. Ruffle your hair a little bit, roll up your sleeves, and loosen your tie a little bit. If you look perfectly neat and cleaned up, it may look like you haven’t done anything. If you look a little disheveled though, it will create the impression that you’re actively involved in doing things at work. [4]

    Tip: Don’t overdo it. There’s a thin line between looking like you’ve been working and looking like you just rolled out of bed.

  5. If you eat lunch at your desk or work station, you’ll create the impression that you don’t even have time for a lunch break. This will have the added benefit of preserving your solitude, so people won’t actually be able to see you wasting your time at work while you eat. [5]
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Method 2
Method 2 of 3:

Using Technology to Your Advantage

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  1. Leave your computer on and open a program, email, or project that you’re supposed to be working on. Minimize any web page or game that you’re playing whenever someone gets close so that they only see your decoy screen. [6]
    • Even if someone sees you not working, they’ll see the screen and think that you’re just taking a short break instead of actively avoiding work.
    • There are also several online programs that disguise social media websites on your work computer. MS Outlook will make social media sites look like an email program and MS Word will put web forums into a Microsoft Word document. [7]
  2. Pick up your office phone and dial *72. [8] Once you hear a dial tone, enter your cell phone number. This will forward calls from your office phone to your cell phone, allowing you to respond to colleagues like you’re in the office, even if you aren’t. [9]
    • To turn call forwarding off, press *73 on your office phone. [10]
    • If anyone finds out and asks why you’ve forwarded your phone, you can always flip it to make it seem like you’re working harder by explaining that you don’t want to miss any work calls after hours.
  3. One of the biggest signs that you aren’t actually working will be inactivity on email. If you fail to respond to urgent or time-sensitive emails, people will become suspicious that you aren’t doing what you’re supposed to. Answer the occasional work-related email to give the impression that you’re at least paying attention.

    Tip: Answer the occasional work email after your work day is done. This will trick people into thinking that you have a great work ethic, and they won’t question your productivity during the day.

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Method 3
Method 3 of 3:

Getting out of the Office

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  1. If you’re stepping out of the office when you aren’t supposed to, leave a heavy and colorful piece of clothing on the back of your chair. This will give people that pop by your desk the impression that you haven’t left the building even if you have. [11]
  2. If you hear or see someone approaching you, and have time to pull out your phone, pretend to have a work-related conversation on the phone. This is a simple way to avoid colleagues and supervisors, since they won’t want to interrupt you while you’re talking—especially if you make it clear that it’s work-related. [12]
    • Walk out of the area or building while talking on the phone. Your coworkers will think that you just want to focus on the call, and you’ll buy yourself some extra free time outside of your workspace.
  3. If you’re feeling particularly adventurous, you can choose to simply sneak out of the office and go home for the day. You can always invent an emergency or explain that you were going to work from home if you get caught. It may result in an uncomfortable conversation with your boss, but if nobody notices it means that you get the day off! [13]
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  • Question
    What do I do when I'm bored?
    Savannah Bowen
    Community Answer
    If you're bored at work, it might be a sign that your job isn't right for you! Try hunting for a new job, or if you truly want to stay, find some games online, read a book, or even work on your grammar.
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      Warnings

      • If your company monitors your computer or Internet usage, your deception will not go unnoticed for long if it includes wasting time on games, internet surfing, or other online-only time wasters.
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      • If you find yourself constantly trying to find a way to waste time. It’s probably a sign that you should get a new job.
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      References

      1. ↑ https://tallypress.com/fun/10-tips-pretend-working-work/
      2. ↑ https://tallypress.com/fun/10-tips-pretend-working-work/
      3. ↑ https://tallypress.com/fun/10-tips-pretend-working-work/
      4. ↑ https://tallypress.com/fun/10-tips-pretend-working-work/
      5. ↑ https://tallypress.com/fun/10-tips-pretend-working-work/
      6. ↑ https://www.makeuseof.com/tag/need-break-dont-want-get-caught-check-slacker-sites/
      7. ↑ https://www.makeuseof.com/tag/need-break-dont-want-get-caught-check-slacker-sites/
      8. ↑ https://youtu.be/SV9ialMgHhk?t=45
      9. ↑ https://countrycode.org/business-call-forwarding.html
      1. ↑ https://youtu.be/SV9ialMgHhk?t=61
      2. ↑ https://tallypress.com/fun/10-tips-pretend-working-work/
      3. ↑ https://www.pewinternet.org/2011/08/15/americans-and-their-cell-phones/
      4. ↑ https://www.wsj.com/articles/BL-JB-13355

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