How to Understand LGBT+ Terminology

Co-authored by Deb Schneider, LCSW, PPSC and Hannah Madden

Last Updated: April 26, 2024 Approved

Millions of people around the world are members of the LGBT+ community. As with any group, they have their own language and terms they use to define themselves and others, which can be a little tough to keep up with. If you’d like to be an ally or you’re a member of the LGBT+ community yourself, understanding the terminology can be really helpful.

Here are eleven tips to help you better understand LGBT+ terminology.

1

Learn what LGBT+ stands for.

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There are a few common terms that will come up a lot. Take a look at the acronym LGBT+. It stands for lesbian, bisexual, gay, and transgender. The “+” on the end is to signify that there are more identities encompassed within the LGBT+ community than just those four. ^{[1]
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- You might also see the acronym “LGBTQIA,” which stands for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer or questioning, intersex, and asexual.
- The order of the letters does not suggest some identities are more important or are more part of the community than others.

2

Take a look at sexual identities.

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There are a lot of sexual identities in the LGBT+ community. Your sexual identity defines which gender or genders you are attracted to. Keep in mind that sexuality is different from gender, so it has no bearing on your gender identity or expression, such as how you dress, behave, or present yourself. Some common sexual identities include: ^{[2]
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- Lesbian: A non-man who is exclusively attracted to other non-men.
- Gay: Refers to someone who isn't attracted to people of the opposite gender. Unlike the term "lesbian", "gay" can refer to people of any gender.
- Homosexual: Someone attracted exclusively people of the same gender. The term is considered offensive or outdated by many members of the LGBT+ community due to it's clinical history. In most contexts, "gay" or "lesbian" is preferred. ^{[3]
 X
 Research source} Some people may still label themselves as such, especially if their romantic and sexual orientation are different.
- Straight/heterosexual: A person who is exclusively attracted to people who aren't of the same gender.
- Asexual: Someone who experiences little to no sexual attraction. Contrary to popular belief, asexual people can still have romantic attraction for others, and they might even still have sex with their partners. ^{[4]
 X
 Expert Source
 
 Deb Schneider, LCSW, PPSC
 Licensed Clinical Social Worker
 
 Expert Interview. 2 April 2021.}
- Demisexual: Someone who only experiences sexual attraction after forming an emotional bond.
- Bisexual: A person who is sexually attracted to two or more genders. Although the prefix "bi" means "two", bisexual people can and do feel attraction towards nonbinary people.
 - Someone who is attracted to multiple, but not all genders may describe themselves as polysexual.
- Pansexual: A person who is sexually attracted to all genders without any preference. ^{[5]
 X
 Expert Source
 
 Deb Schneider, LCSW, PPSC
 Licensed Clinical Social Worker
 
 Expert Interview. 2 April 2021.}
 - Omnisexual describes someone who is attracted to all genders, but has a preference, or finds gender to still be important in attraction.

3

Look through the different types of romantic attraction.

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Romantic attraction describes emotional and mental attraction. It’s different from sexual attraction in that you can be romantically attracted to someone without wanting to have sex with them, and vice versa. Some common romantic attraction terms you might hear include:
- Aromantic: Someone who experiences little to no romantic attraction. They can, however, experience sexual attraction to others.
- Demiromantic: Someone who only experiences romantic attraction after forming an emotional bond.
- Biromantic: Someone who is romantically attracted to more than one gender.
 - Polyromantic describes someone who is romantically attracted to multiple, but not all genders.
- Panromantic: Someone who is romantically attracted to all genders with no preference.
 - Someone who is romantically attracted to all genders, but has a preference would be described as omniromantic.
- Heteroromantic: Someone who is exclusively romantically attracted to people who aren't of the same gender.
- Homoromantic: Someone who is exclusively romantically attracted to people who aren't of the opposite gender.

4

Learn more about gender identity.

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Gender identity is how someone personally identifies their gender. Gender identity is not to be confused with gender expression. Gender expression is the external appearance of one's gender. This is usually (but not always) portrayed through your behavior, clothing, mannerisms, and even your voice. Gender is also different to sex. Biological sex is based of one's sex characteristics, gender is based of what someone is on the inside.
- Cisgender: A person whose gender identity aligns with the gender they were assigned at birth.
- Trans man/Transgender man/FTM (female-to-male): A man who was assigned the sex “female” at birth.
- Trans woman/Transgender woman/MTF (male-to-female): A woman who was assigned the sex “male” at birth.
- Non-binary (sometimes written as "nonbinary"): A person who is not either a man or a woman. They may use “they/them” pronouns (but not always). Nonbinary people fall under the transgender umbrella, however, some nonbinary people do not consider themselves transgender.
- Gender-fluid (sometimes written as "genderfluid): A person who is not any one gender. They may switch genders on a regular basis.
- Two-Spirit: An umbrella term for Native American people who may be the traditional third gender in their culture and community. This term is exclusively for Indigenous Americans.
- Assigned gender is the gender which someone was assumed to have at birth. AFAB and AMAB are acronyms that stand for "assigned female at birth" and "assigned male at birth" respectively.
 - CAFAB AND CAMAB stand for "coercively assigned female/male at birth". These terms are used to describe intersex people who have had surgery at birth, when they were too young to consent, to have a typically "male" or "female" genitalia. ^{[6]
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Quiz

wikiHow Quiz: Am I Asexual?

People who identify as asexual (“ace”) generally don’t experience sexual attraction and/or may have absent or low desire for sexual contact. However, like all areas of sexuality, there’s a whole spectrum. Ace folks may still want close emotional relationships, romance, non-sexual contact like cuddling, and some might even experience attraction from time to time. Sound like you? You get the last say in how you want to identify, but if you’re ready to explore your feelings and sexuality, take this quiz.

1 of 16

How do you feel about physical touch and physical intimacy?

Strongly against. I like my personal space.

I like hugging and cuddling but don’t want to do much more.

I like kissing, but nothing more intense.

I wouldn’t mind being physically intimate with my partner.

5

Take a look at non-binary genders.

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Non-binary genders include anyone who is not male or female. While many people do specifically identify as non-binary, there are other terms under the umbrella of non-binary that people use to get more specific. Some common ones include: ^{[7]
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- Genderqueer: An umbrella term to refer to anyone who is not cisgender.
- Non-binary: An umbrella term people use to refer to a person who is not male or female; between two genders (usually masculine and feminine).
- Bigender: A term for people whose gender encompasses two genders, either together or separately.
- Genderfluid: A person who flows between two or more gender presentations.
- Neutrois: A person with a neutral gender.
- Agender: A person without any gender.
- Androgyne: A person who is multiple genders at the same time, or middle gender.

6

Refer to transgender people respectfully.

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Transgender people face a lot of discrimination. There are some terms that are no longer used that can be hurtful toward transgender people. If you’re talking about transgender people or someone who is transgender, take a look through these common terms to make sure you’re using them correctly. ^{[8]
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- Transition: A term to describe the process of moving from one gender to another. Try to avoid saying “sex-change,” “sex-operation,” or “pre-op” in reference to transitioning.
- Transgender person: A term to describe someone who is transgender. If you aren’t transgender, never say “tranny,” “transvestite,” or “transsexual,” as these are all outdated and offensive. Do not refer to trans people as “transgenders”, but instead as transgender people. “Transgendered” is also an offensive term.

7

Understand intersex identity.

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Intersex describes a person a person whose sex characteristics (reproductive organs, sex hormones, sex chromosomes, etc. ) did not neatly fit into the “male” or “female” category when they were born. An intersex person may be any gender.
- The word “perisex” describes someone who is not intersex. The term “dyadic” is also used for the same purpose, but is rejected by some intersex people because it implies sex is binary. ^{[9]
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8

Look through the different pronouns.

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Pronouns are the words you use to refer to someone in the third person. For instance, when you’re talking about your friend coming over later, you might say, “He is coming to my house.” In that sentence, “he” is the pronoun. Different people use different pronouns, and it’s polite to ask someone what their pronouns are when you first meet them. Common pronouns include: ^{[10]
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Trustworthy Source
LGBTQIA Resource Center
The LGBTQIA Resource Center of the University of California, Davis.
Go to source}
- She/her: Commonly used for women.
- He/him: Commonly used for men.
- They/them: Commonly used for non-binary or gender-nonconforming people.
- Some people may use a selection of these pronouns, for example they/she pronouns.
- Some people use neopronouns. Neopronouns are pronouns other than she/her, he/him, and they/them. An example of this is if someone used xe/xem pronouns.
- It is extremely important to use and respect everyones’ pronouns. If you aren't sure of how to properly use someone's pronouns, it's best to ask.

9

Watch out for words that have been reclaimed.

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The most common one is the word “queer.” While it used to be considered a slur, the LGBT+ community has reclaimed it, and it’s now an umbrella term for anyone who goes against the gender or sexual binary. However, some still consider it offensive for anyone outside of the LGBT+ community to use the word queer, though some LGBT+ people are comfortable with it and even prefer it. ^{[11]
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- Different people within the LGBT+ community have varying levels of comfort with this word. When in doubt, don’t call someone else queer without checking in first.

10

Do research if you aren’t sure.

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New terms pop up all the time. If you ever hear something and you aren’t sure what it means, do a quick Google search to find out what you can. Remember - Google is free! If you’re close with someone in the LGBT+ community, you can ask them if you’d like to, but it may be easier to do research on your own first. ^{[12]
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- Members of the LGBT+ community aren’t obligated to educate you about their terminology. While it’s fine to ask your friends, approaching a stranger or someone you don’t know well with questions about terms can feel invasive.

11

Be respectful.

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Show sympathy and compassion for diverse people. Love comes in many forms, and LGBT+ people are simply living their lives in the way that’s best for them. Even if you don’t quite understand something or it’s different from what you learned when you were a kid, try to respect it and take it seriously. Your LGBT+ friends, family members, peers, coworkers, children, and neighbors will thank you! ^{[13]
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- If you hear friends, coworkers, or others using disrespectful language towards LGBT+ people, say “I have loved ones and people I care about who are queer/LGBT. And so it’s important to me that we use the right terminology and that we’re respectful of people’s pronouns.” ^{[14]
 X
 Expert Source
 
 Deb Schneider, LCSW, PPSC
 Licensed Clinical Social Worker
 
 Expert Interview. 2 April 2021.}

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I like both genders but I like girls a bit more. Am I still bi?

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Definitely! You could be bisexual with just a more female preference. This is totally normal!

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I don't feel like I have a gender, and I'm into both genders, but I rarely want to have sex with anyone except for people I've known for a while. Is this weird?

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I'd identify you as an agender, biromantic, demisexual person. Agender means without gender, biromantic is feeling romantic (not sexual) attraction toward both genders, and demisexual is only feeling sexual attraction to someone whom you share a strong emotional bond/connection with. This is not weird, and you're not alone.

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I'm a girl and I'm attracted to both genders. But, I'm not sexually attracted to guys. What am I?

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You might be a biromantic homosexual. Study the difference between romantic orientation and sexual orientation, and see which terms fit.

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Tips

If you accidentally use a term wrong, don’t make a huge deal about it. Just correct yourself and move on.

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Always use people’s correct pronouns.

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Don’t judge somebody by orientation or gender or gender identity. They’ll be offended and probably won’t accept your apology.

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How to Understand LGBT+ Terminology

Steps

Learn what LGBT+ stands for.

Take a look at sexual identities.

Look through the different types of romantic attraction.

Learn more about gender identity.

wikiHow Quiz: Am I Asexual?

How do you feel about physical touch and physical intimacy?

Take a look at non-binary genders.

Refer to transgender people respectfully.

Understand intersex identity.

Look through the different pronouns.

Watch out for words that have been reclaimed.

Do research if you aren’t sure.

Be respectful.

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